Have you kept a secret and you never knew this would result in the way it did when the promises are broken and you're the one left to pick up the pieces. Who knew that this would be the result of keeping a secret somehow the evidence started leaking and my masculinity started to weaken....see I had entertained these thoughts for so long that I began to imitate these forces. Sexual urges started clinging like the spirit of anger and the spirit of pride and the spirit of lies and the spirit of pornography.
I was held in content of my sin to witness my own demise but I can testify any day and anytime that wasn't me. The scripture describes those who will inherit his kingdom and also this is message to all that I wouldn't tell if you don't want me to but you would have to do that yourself and make the decisions not to do that anymore.
One thing about keeping secrets is that you make them and promise to keep them till death because it's impossible to change. I though being quiet would choke the life of it but keeping quiet was what was the feeling towards it. To consistently choose the right way means you can live that same exact way and for this outcome to come we must start at overcoming because God's message is worth repeating.
So I'm praying tonight that we release some of the loudest and deepest secrets, only to his ears alone and make sure we are open to receive our healing. If God did it when I was challenged and felt consumed by own thoughts and the things I knew would damage me, he will equally change you. This is how secrets works, if you tell somebody like the first person you think you can trust... there is a likely chance that before you wake up the next morning your story will be all over the place.
That even makes the whole thing a lot difficult, but only if you can confide the truth to God. Sexual urges can lead to so many things, that I can't even start listing them and its effect psychologically. The person you made a commitment to, never to open up would be living their best life and allow you suffer with it for the rest of your life.
I was exposed to so many things from age 15 and my innocence was stolen, but who would predict the conflict with several leaks, one touch with no lights. That was my struggle, living in darkness and craving for it every single day. How do you feel when you know the truth but choose not to because what you do is fun, well I have a word for you today it's never too late to tell.
If it's something that would require you to talk to someone for an advice then go for it...this is planned to be short today cuz I'm really unwell with fever....so I love you all so much.
Thank you for reading.
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Bye for now.
29 SEPTEMBER 2021
Living in Nigeria we have been exposed to a lot of things from a very young age that have left us scarred for life. We can't even talk about the things we have seen, but it's better to just tell it all to God so He can lift the burden from our heart. There are some secrets that are better left buried, but God sees all