Caregiver's Insanity (My Own Story)

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Written by
4 years ago (Last updated: 2 years ago)

Caregiving isn't an easy job. You'll be handling different kinds of patients with different kinds of illnesses and different kinds of personalities and behavior.

In my few years of working as a Caregiver, I could say that it is so exhausting. As a Caregiver we need to have empathy and compassion towards our patients, we need to be responsible and reliable, we need to have long patience, and of course flexible as we aren't only taking care of our patients, but also do some small house chores like cooking for our patient's meal, washing their clothes, preparing their bed, etc.

As a Caregiver, we need to be strong and healthy as our job involved assisting our patients, especially those who can't do their activities of daily living alone. We need to assist our patients who can't walk, stand or sit alone and assist them in eating, bathing, defecating, urinating, and even brushing their teeth. Sometimes, our work involved lifting, pushing, and carrying stuff.

There are times that we need to handle our patient's agitation and reassure them. Most of the time, agitation and aggression happen for a reason. So as a Caregiver, we need to find the cause and reassure them to stop the patient's misbehavior.

Sometimes, we encounter patients going back to/her childish behavior. And when it happens, we need to be a child as well. We play with them, talk with them, shared stories with them, and sometimes, escape from things thrown by them.

Our job can be overwhelming and rewarding, especially if we're over our heads or have control over the situation. But this job also involves many stressors. And since it is a long-term challenge, the emotional impact can build up over time. It's really disheartening when there's no hope for our patients to get better, and when their condition is gradually deteriorating.

We, Caregivers, take good care of other people but we can't even take care of our family. It's really depressing when you have a family member who is sick yet we are away taking care of another patient. I guess this is the sad part of our life and other healthcare professionals.

The pain of the past is still in my mind. I felt so guilty about my grandfather's death. He was sick at that time but I can't even take care of him as I was busy taking care of another patient. One day, I received a call from my cousin saying that our grandfather passed away. I froze from my post and a feeling of guilt formed inside me. Tears gradually fell, lucky that my patient was on the bed at that time, or it might trigger her agitation.

I sat down in the corner and contemplate the past and asked myself - "If I had taken care of him, will he live longer?" I went home later that day and can't even look directly at his dead body. It took me a long time to accept that it was his fate. That he died because of his severe illness. That it wasn't my fault.

That memory is still painful, which carved a scar in my heart and my mind.

And now I am here abroad doing the same things. Away from home and family and can't look after them if they're sick. I just relied on my family members who will look after our sick loved ones.

My work is depressing, but I'm trying my best to fight against depression as it might consume my whole life. I don't want to die abroad. I still want to go home, be with my family, celebrate occasions with them, and play with my niece and nephews, and I want to take care of my parents once they get old.

I don't want to experience that painful memory from the past again.

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Written by
4 years ago (Last updated: 2 years ago)

Comments

You have a very noble job and I admire you for that.

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4 years ago

I just want to say thank you to all the caregivers out there. All of you, are the real heroes in this world. I hope that you know that the people you care for want you to know how much they appreciate you. You are absolutely amazing and selfless. May God grant you his peace and wisdom.

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4 years ago

Thank you.. i really hope all will appreciate our hardwork.. 😅

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4 years ago

I know you can't please everyone to appreciate you but there are those who knows how hard and selfless your work is.

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4 years ago

Of course, we all can't please everyone. But still thankful with this job.. because of the time I studied caregiving, i met my real friends.

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4 years ago

Good for you. I salute you dear!

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4 years ago

I think nurses and caregivers deserve so much more. Doctors deals with problems, illnesses, diseases but not much with sentiments. They do their jobs and they are gone. I think caregivers or nurses do the most and the worse of the job. They are the one that support mentally, emotionally and to some extent medically people. Which is much needed really.

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4 years ago

Yes much needed, but sometimes less appreciated. But what matters most is when you see your patient getting better.. and you're helping other people..

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4 years ago

wow, since you can handle it then you must have a very good virtue and I envy that...with this experience, you will be able to cope with different kind of people anywher you may find yourself...you are very lucky to work as a caregiver, you will appreciate it in the future

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4 years ago

It might be called lucky, but at the same time has stressors... emotional impact, distressing..but yeah,.. maybe in the future I will thank myself to get this kind of job.. this challenges might be a blessing in disguise in the future.

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4 years ago

exactly, so just hold onto it, cherish it, and always offer the best you can

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4 years ago

Thank you.. i really appreciate the encouragement I've got here... you guys are blessing to me as well

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4 years ago

you are welcome

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4 years ago

I watched a movie titled 'Caregiver' starring Sharon Cuneta. It is indeed a hard job. I felt emotional after watching that thinking that one of our kababayans are experiencing that.

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4 years ago

It is really so exhausting.. I'm thinking to quit this job once i saved enough money

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4 years ago

Heart touching dear... Thanks for it

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4 years ago

caregiver was one of the toughest job.. I salute all the people who sacrifices their life in other countries

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4 years ago

Thank you.. it's not easy to work broad.. really a tough one. This is my first time to work abroad, and on my first year here, i was always missing home..

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4 years ago

Yes, you are of a real heroes of our nation

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4 years ago

That's true. Medical professionals and everyone under the line of work can't do anything for their own families. It's against the law to do so. It makes you question why you even pursued a medical career to begin with if you can't help when you're needed the most and by the people you wanted to help the most

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4 years ago

True... one of my before has a son patient's who is a doctor. Everytime my patient got hospitalized, her son only visited her during free time and it's other doctors who look after her... Those times, it made me think about you've said, why pursue a medical career if her son can't even look after his sick mother

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4 years ago

Move on on your grandfathers death dear , I know that his happy even if you didnt take care of him when he was sick . I know he is so proud of you right now . Dont feel so guilty that you taking care other while your family is taking care by your relatives also . You have to do this to give the best for your family and also for them to live . I know that they are so thankful and proud to you for being so responsible . Just always take care of yourself dear your family is waiting for you to come home . And have time to each other again ;)

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4 years ago

Thank you. It actually happens 4years ago. But that memory already engraved in my mind.. even if I moved on, it still painful whenever a flashback appear in my mind... and thank you for your encouragement, . It will make me more positive. 😊

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4 years ago

Your welcome dear . I hope the hurt will gone soon as you were remember it . I hope youll remember the good sides or the happy moments with your grandpa rather than his death ;)

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4 years ago

Sure sis..thank you for encouraging me..

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4 years ago

I hope you get the blessings you deserve! I hope a happy life for you because you deserve it. I admire you so much after reading this article. And I will surely pray for you to be happy and receive the greatest blessings that you deserve. Have a blast!

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4 years ago

Thank you so much... workers like me really need a healthy body and mind in order to perform our tasks well...

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4 years ago

Right!!!

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4 years ago

What an extra ordinary life you have my friend. I would feel depressed If I'm on your feet, I know my limitations. I salute your strong personality and keeping your heads up in your hard time, just always remember what you're doing is for your family here in the Philippines, reminisce your happy moments with them, make it as your strength.

Thank you for sharing my friend.

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4 years ago

Thank you for that wonderful comment. 😅 kidding aside, yeah i will remain positive here coz I'm doing this for my family... once i saved enough money, i want to get a deserving vacation..lol..

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4 years ago

Very touching article. You're so brave because being alone and living far away from your family are already difficult but here you are, healthy, kicking and a blessing to others. I consider it as your success because you always choose to be strong and not to be demotivated, so Congratulations friend :)👏👏👏👏👏👏👏I know your family members are so proud of you and they're already waiting your come back :)

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4 years ago

I just hope that I can hold until the last day of my contract here... as for now, my body isn't that strong and healthy anymore.. sometimes I'm exhausted..but always praying to God to give me strong and healthy body so i can continue my work and go back home safe, healthy and kicking

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4 years ago

for now i will save your article. i am going to read it later at home. so i can fully understand this 😇🙏

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4 years ago

I'm also in the healthcare field and I feel your exhaustion. Especially on this pandemic, you will sometimes ask yourself if this is all worth it! but then, at the end of the day you will just say to yourself if no one does, who will?

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4 years ago

True.. this is the saddest part of our life. But it i rewarding when you know you take control over the situation, or your patient get better.. but still.. the emotional impact is our worst enemy whenever the situation turns down..

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4 years ago

I think that caregivers, are never paid, for what they offer. What they offer, cannot be counted with money. They are compensated, for their time given.

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4 years ago

Sometimes, money doesn't matter in our work, we felt happy if our patient get better or take control on unwanted situation... and it's more worth it than money

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4 years ago

Of course. If you leave the money, money, money scam, life is happy and wonderful.

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4 years ago

true all noble work is really hard. but because we need and love it we do not try ... it is very difficult especially if you are not with your family and you are far from them ..and i salute to all ofw all over the world..

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4 years ago

Thank you... many ofws already gave up their lives abroad. So i will remain positive as possible as i could so i can go back home alive and be with my family.

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4 years ago

Yeah sis. Always think positive and be brave, always put God in the center of you.😊

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4 years ago

Sad to know that you experience that, youre right job like caregiving was a decent and rewarding job, but always consider your own family aside from other things, being with your family in such moments,hard or good times was so treasurable, so better have time on them as long as we live in this world

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4 years ago

Yeah I know that, but it's hardest thin we can't do while doing this job. Especially now that I'm abroad, it's really depressing. My depression here is on and off... sometimes, I just do things which will divert my thoughts into a positive one. Sometimes my body is burnt out but my mind remain strong, as I don't want to end my life in here. 😥

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4 years ago

this is really sad. actually I feel the same way too when I was working in Dubai. As much as you want to be with your family always not only at times when they they are sick or if they need help, but times like celebrating birthdays, graduation, anniversaries, etc. , we can't be with them all the time since we need to work for them.

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4 years ago

True.. and it gives us depression. Those who can't handle it just chose to end their life. But i want to remain positive until i get back home.

Btw, are you a caregiver too?

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4 years ago

No. I worked as a customer service representative. I worked there for more than 5 years and It's really hard. But I am thankful to my office mates who serves as my second family when I was there.

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4 years ago

Oh.. it's really to be away from your family. It is my first to work abroad..currently on my 3rd year here... but still the homesick is there.. Btw, i have a friend who also worked as cs in dubai before..now she's a virtual english tutor...

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4 years ago

where in dubai? Since 2016 pa ko dito sa pinas. I did not renew my contract anymore. I don't want to leave my little girl na. It's really hard to go if you have your own child na po.

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4 years ago

Dunno, haven't asked... but she just went back there for good last year..

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4 years ago

It's a nice place kasi. Kahit ako If given a chance I want to go back there , but hopefully with my family na.

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4 years ago