Measuring your success with others yardsticks.

This thing about success kept coming to mind after reading Olasquare's article yesterday, I didn't pay much attention to it until I came across another article about success written by Princess Busayo on Hive. The Kp's eventually gave me an idea about what to write and I appreciate them for that.

Our definition for success varies even though it still has one general meaning from which our definition still originates.

According to the Oxford dictionary, success can define as the accomplishment of an aim or purpose. Success is not attached to just a thing because many of us today translate success as wealth, the first thing that comes to mind when we hear the word success is money. Based on our differences, exposure, understanding, experience, family background, we are bound to have different purposes in life, and achieving it regardless of small or cheap it might look to others makes you a successful person.

It could be setting a target based on your family life, it could be education, it could be anything and it can't be written off as long as it brings growth to you or the people aimed at.

Many of us are making the mistake of measuring our success with others' yardsticks and it has been one of the reasons why many people fail to see their progress which automatically discourages them from pressing on.

Let's use Fred and Donald's careers as an illustration.

The two guys are footballers from the same country but they play in different leagues in Europe, Fred signed for Noise FC while Donald signed for Read FC.

Fred is a better player than Donald but he is yet to meet Donald's achievements in the last five years, Fred hasn't won any European trophy in the last five years despite scoring +15 goals to beat every previous season record, he has scored Donald's total goals in five seasons in a single tournament.

Donald isn't performing great but he plays in a better team and they have won three times in the last five European trophies.

Does not winning trophies make Fred unsuccessful?

In as much as we will love to rank them based on trophies they have won, Fred can't be tagged as a failure. The first target of everyone is to develop their self which he is doing from time to time, he might not win the big prize but he is making progress every day. Every step he takes is a success for him and one day would bring the big reward he has been eyeing.

Fred not appreciating his progress can cause him to lose the inspiration for improving himself and that's the case of many people out there, they fail to recognize their growth because they are measuring their success with others' yardsticks.

Donald has the team to his advantage, he is fortunate to play alongside the best players in the world while Fred plays with an average player and still achieves individual growth.

The people you are comparing yourself to might have bigger support you don't know about, dragging yourself down because they are doing better than you is a terrible thing.

Aside from having more resources to their advantage, your aim might be different. Seeing life as competition might make one run into a pit, growth is unlimited and we should move at our pace because doing the opposite can make us crash even before completing our aim.

You and your friend had the plan of building a house before 2023 and while you are saving for the land, he already starting his foundation because he inherited a plot of land from his grandfather. When you bought the land, he was already roofing his own and that doesn't make you a failure.

You should understand that since he owns the land, his first target would be setting a foundation while yours would be getting a plot of land. The timing might be different but you are making progress, measuring your growth with his might make you look like a failure but you aren't as long as you are making progress.

Comparing your success with others can result into:

•Jealousy: This is dangerous and can make you do silly things that could make even your little progress disappear, this is no point in getting jealous. Working hard if you feel you are not doing enough would be better.

• Mental exhaustion: Focusing on others' success as a measurement for yours can drain you mentally. It can steal every bit of energy in and make you feel empty, it would deprive you of the strength to carry on with more little progress that would lead you to bigger glory.

• Not appreciating yourself: Comparing yourself can make you lose what's called "Self Appreciation". It makes your effort look worthless, everything you have struggled to achieve will mean nothing and you start losing them gradually.

Success isn't just a spot, it involves the journey of how you were able to achieve it. The step-by-step process, the good and bad days, everything you encountered while traveling on the path sums up to be success.

Lead image.