What's your opinion on this matter!!.. I need it!!
Recently, I was going through the internet and I saw a post that was written out like this
95% of ladies are guilty of this. Most ladies in relationships and marriages collect gifts and money from other guys without taking permission from their Bfs/ Husbands.
It’s very disrespectful and will eventually lead to cheating. Some ladies will say, why should I take permission from an “ordinary boyfriend?” But if he is ordinary, why are you with him? Most ladies won’t even allow their bfs/ husband eats another lady's food, not to talk of accepting a gift.
Some ladies immediately came to my DM to explain their take or opinion on the matter, the first lady said, there is nothing bad in it, that is it normal for girls to collect gifts from their guy friends, and I asked her, how will she feel if another girl is giving her boyfriend money or buying a gift for him? And she answered with a question, do I take permission from my girlfriend before I collect gifts from my lady's friend? And the conversation continue, she said it is not cheating and she see nothing wrong in a lady accepting gifts from her friends, though she wouldn’t accept gifts in front of her boyfriend cause it might be disrespecting to him but she would when it comes randomly.
She also said she would get jealous if she find out another lady is cooking for her guy, or cooks and bring it over for him to it, and I was like, oh, so you would, but you see nothing bad in you collecting gift from other guys, wahoo. She asked this last question which I avoid, is there anything bad in a lady asking for money from her male friends? I will leave this to the audience.
The second lady's opinion was the one that still got me thinking, I wonder how she reasoned, she said the write up is partial
He is my boyfriend, not my husband, have you ever thought if she is being maltreated or abused by her partner, have you ever thought if the guy is not taking care of her, and what if the guy is stingy and doesn’t see anything bad in being stingy.
There was so much I wanted to point out in what she said, if she’s being maltreated she should leave the guy and go for a better relationship, but in the case of married people, I wouldn’t advise divorce, I would leave that aspect for the likes of @Olasquare and @Oluwa_damilarea to do justice to them, I have read their articles and I believe they have a good sense of judgment on matters like this, she further went ahead to explain herself in a 3.27minute voice note. She said
There are some guys that don’t count it, we are talking about boyfriend now, if I’m with my finance or husband, I won’t collect gift from anyone but boyfriend?, the way relationship is in this current age, guys don’t take girls serious anymore, guys don’t date one girl, but tends to blame girls more, a girl going to the extent of cooking you, when you have a girlfriend, and you collect it, would you be happy if you find out your girlfriend is cooking for another guy, yes, the guy can accept gift but not to the extent of allowing a girl to be cooking for you, there are two different things, the guy can accept gift from his female friends but not food, because you won’t like it if your girlfriend is cooking for another person, so that write up is partial, if my boyfriend isn’t treating me right and there is another guy out there who is ready to treat me like a queen, then I would accept gift from him, a relationship that hasn’t reach a certain stage of seriousness shouldn’t be done with all the heart if not they will lose at the end.
And it went on like that, I don’t even know how to reply to her, but in my own opinion, there is nothing worse when a girl receives a gift from a guy friend that is not after her when she knows he is after her, she shouldn’t collect gifts or money from him, she should stay with her boyfriend no matter who or how she is, and if she can’t, she should break up and go after the other guy, same goes for the guys too.
My opinion might be wrong or might have some fault in it, I’m not saying it is the best, you can drop a comment and let's learn from each other. I will drop my pen here
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I reall appreciate you mentioning me here, I've been away and I just came back to get the notification, my take on it if they're married is to stay, it's not enough reason to leave your marriage because he doesn't gift you which I highly doubt he didn't show signs of before they got married. To the ladies, know your love language, don't make your man feel not capable, you've met this guy ? Fine, you like him? Fine. Are you sure he's giving you all you want? If no, then why go into a relationship... I do gifts and I also love surprises but in cases when I see guys gift my girl, I'll feel like I'm not doing enough especially if I watch her reaction to it... Thanks for this btw, I should write on this too...