Is there a limit to how much of ourselves we sacrifice?

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1 year ago

The ability and willingness to make selfless sacrifices is a much valued and rare trait to find in a person. If you have people who are that selfless and do things just for you, please do not let them go for they are getting rarer by the hour. If you're one of those people please do not change. We need more of you in this world. 💖💖

Although I consider the trait as a very desirable one, infact "sacrifice" forms a very good part of my beliefs but I have been thinking recently if I made a mistake or is it just the way I am? I don't plan in changing any part of me except the negative parts so I will keep on sacrificing for God, myself and for others for as long as I live!

Though, I'd love to do whatever I can for people, my past experiences have taught me otherwise and I know better now. I used to be a person with no boundaries and have gone out of my way several times just to make people happy. The most painful thing about it all is that 90% of the people I did these for end up taking me for a fool and exploiting that weakness of mine. I am no fool and know what the things they do but couldn't bring myself to stop because, my loved ones are both my strength and my weakness and the fact that they know this provided them an added advantage and most times they do so without any repercussions. They think they found a puppet they could use anytime it suits them and yes! There was once a puppet!

There's a limit to everything they say. Every action, every human has a limit and when it is reached and it gets too much , a reaction follows even from the meekest of people. I soon realised that there are people who are better off loved from a distance and just like that, a new me was born. I started taking actions and distancing myself from people without even taking the slow step of reducing contact with them. I just cut them all off!! They were shocked and couldn't recognise me, some even proceeded with smear campaigns and started telling others that I have grown crazy and stuff like that. The thing with me is that no matter how bad a person hurts me I can never stop loving them and like I said, that's my weakness, but over time I have learnt to hide it from people so that they won't continually use it against me by mistaking it for foolishness. Even though I can't unlove you once I do, I have learnt and now mastered the art of loving from a distance to protect my own peace as that's my duty and no other's. I have learnt to equate emotional pain with physical pain. You can't watch a person slice your flesh like onions and you stay watching without doing anything just because you love them. You go away from them, heal and keep staying far away from them as possible. That's exactly what I do now when people hurt me continually, I stay away, heal and keep staying away unless extremely necessary... I know it is not my place to tell you what you should and shouldn't do but you should do that too if you have those people in your life.

It's true that making other people happy also brings you a form of happiness, but when the "if you're happy, then I am happy phrase" is uttered all too often, the party you're favouring starts thinking that they are entitled and once you stop doing things for them and start doing things for yourself, they say you don't love them anymore and say you're "changed". It's too hard not to do that as it is a dark part of human nature. I have seen such things happen in relationships countless times.

Humans have a certain level of self grandiosity in them and if unfortunately you get associated with those whose level of self grandiosity is high up the scale, they expect you to keep sacrificing for them just to show that you love them and sadly, these type of people dominate those who aren't like that.

Never forget guys, our sanity should be placed over everything else. Once a person starts driving you nuts in a bad way, take a step back, access the situation objectively and do what you have to do to keep your sanity intact. You owe yourself that. If there's one thing you should never sacrifice for anyone including your own self, that would be your sanity and by this I mean mental health. Honestly very few people are mentally sane these days so don't be among the lot.

Remember, do not let the behaviours of other's change the beautiful soul you have, I have seen people turn bad because they have been treated un-nicely in the past. Maintain your nature, stick to your beliefs and setting your boundaries and enforcing them strongly is one way to do that.

Thanks for reading,

Yours Layly,

💖💖💖💖.

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1 year ago

Comments

I used to be selfless a lot in the past and will go the extra mile for people but I stopped it after observing that humans can be very selfish sometimes and someone you sacrificed a lot for today can turn their backs on you tomorrow

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1 year ago

I can't count how many times I've been told that I have changed simply because I noticed o was being used and decided to stay away. People will always want to use another and not feel an ounce of remorse for it. It's out duty and ours alone to take care of ourselves

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1 year ago

It is oo. Infact it id compulsory. Stay away from those who cause nothing but trouble.

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1 year ago

Sometimes we need to set bounderies and decide for our own sake, this is not about being selfish at times but rather a self love. Because when others see you that you're alwys there, there are tendecies that they will use you and take advantage of you over time.

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1 year ago

You're right. Over familiarity breeds contempt. Distancing ourselves helps a great deal in maintaining our selves.

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1 year ago

You have a good point, sacrifices shouldn't be limited but we can make them in forms that wouldn't bring any sort of familiarity we wouldn't appreciate.

I love to have to do my best for people as well but I am used to keeping my distance regardless how much favor I have done. Getting to close to people doesn't work very far for me, because they end up bringing bad energy which I don't entertain.

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1 year ago

That's right. That way you get the respect you deserve. Familiarity truly brings contempt.

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1 year ago

loving from a distance

I like that and I agree. We can still be there for others if needed but it's okay not to be involved with their toxicity.

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1 year ago

That's it. Just stay away from their negative energy and only associate if necessary.

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1 year ago

Some people always want to take advantage of our kindness and they will make us feel like we did the wrong thing by offering helping hands to them.

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1 year ago

That's why we should always do from our hearts so that we don't feel disappointed when we are under appreciated

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1 year ago

We should always limit how much we sacrifice ourselves for other people. Some people don't know our worth and we should walk away because they'll keep taking us for granted. It has happened to me and I know how it feels

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1 year ago

That's sad nature of humans, they never value something when it's over available.

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1 year ago