To whom much is given, much shouldn't be expected
"To whom much is given, much is expected". This is among one of the most popular statements among the population that is often used to address a situation about give and take. Well, I'm going to address the above topic from a slit different angle.
Countless times, I have heard men and women alk about a friend/ relative who they had rendered a tremendous assistance in the past. They often become shock and bitter when such a friend fail to reciprocate their kindness if the tables were turned. This makes the individual to feel cheated and the unpleasant situation would linger far too long in their minds, making such a person bitter and resentful whenever they remember the person who had "betrayed" them.
This attitude of "rub my back and I rub yours when the need arises" often leads to animosity and hatred between two individuals and even between two families. I have seen alot of selfish folks render unsolicited help to others and would later use it as a weapon against the beneficiary in the future. As time goes on, they would want the other person to always agree with them on every issue irrespective even when they wrong . What's worse, they would want the other person to live their life according to their dictates .This could later become unbearable for the other person who would one day declare that they have had enough and walk away from such a malignant friendship or partnership.
Expecting too much from others because of whatever favor you have done for them in the past is simply unfair. Personally, I don't get to achieve or accomplish alot of the things I had expected from myself, so why would i expect so much from others irrespective of my closeness with them, especially when they have their own lives to sort out.
I believe that we all had assisted a pauper on the streets with food, money or clothing recently. Would you be looking forward to the person reciprocating the kindness if you eventually become in need of financial assistance tomorrow? Ofcourse not. Infact, the destitute would be the last person that would ever cross your mind if you decide to go seek help. This is because you have helped him with no strings attached. You did it out of the goodness of your heart . You did it because you felt like, not because you had to. This is the type of mindset we should cultivate when we are about to render a favor to anyone. Ofcourse, you could decide not to help or even look in that person's direction, and no one would hold you responsible. If you fail to help, some other passerby will.
If you are the kind of person that can't help being emotional or upset whenever people don't help you the way you have helped them in the past, then you shouldn't take special effort or cause inconveniences to yourself when helping others. Chances are that the other person wouldn't bend backwards for you when you step into similar shoes in the future. This might cause you alot pain because too much expectations on others often results in regrets.
I know of a man who put his life on hold when he decided to sponsor his younger brother through school. He was banking on the fact that when his brother had graduated and got a good job, he would help take care of his own children and their education. But guess what, as soon as the young man got a job, he started saving and planning towards his own wedding. This arrangement did not sit well with the older man. He knew that when his brother gets married, he would definitely care less about his nephews and nieces and focus on building his own family. He couldn't convince his younger brother to delay his marriage a little longer. In summary, the relationship between the two men deteriorated badly and the older man felt cheated. Once in a while, I hear him telling his neighbors how evil humans can be whenever he recounts what has happened between him and his brother to anyone who cared to listen. Lol
Ofcourse, it might seem quite difficult at first if you decide not to go out of your way to help, but believe me you are not as good as you think . No one is perfect.. Also, you are not as bad as others might make you think. They would definitely get over it and everyone would be just fine..
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Thanks for reading 🙏🙏🙏🙏
This is a very essential topic, the mentality has to change coz literally a person shouldn’t give with the intention of taking advantage of the next person.. fine it feels not so good when i had maybe giving out something that belongs to me and yet the person I give it to don’t appreciate it.. I’ve been under this influence before, and it was until I returned everything I had my freedom..