It’s Getting Near And I Don’t Know How To Feel About It
I received some news this morning while I was attending my class in Biochemistry. It’s about our limited face to face classes. Our professor in Anatomy told us that it will push through next month and they are just finishing with the guidelines. While we were still waiting, we were advised to buy the needed laboratory materials for the subject. It was a long list and fortunately, I already have some of the materials.
Please start preparing the following;
(Per student)
1. Dissecting Set (Scalpel holder no. 4, Scalpel blade no. 20, Surgical scissors (Straight)
2.50-cc syringe
3.15 gauge needle
4.Laboratory gown
5.N-95 face mask
6.Protective Eyewear or Goggles
7.Ambidextrous Gloves (1 box)
(Per group = 4 members)
1.Canine specimen
2.10 liters formaldehyde 37% solution
3.Euthanizing agents such as Zoletil, Xylazine, and KCl = will be discussed later on after finalizing the number of groups
4.Plastic drums with cover
5.Animal Restraint (muzzle, rope etc)
6.5-cc, 3-cc, and 1-cc syringes
Good thing is that our school will provide medical insurance for all of us. I don't need to pay 900 pesos per month for the student Philheath.
I was shocked when I heard the news, I didn’t know what to feel about it. I was in a blurry state. I know this is what I really wanted months back but I also know that I am not ready.
I've always mentioned in my previous blogs regarding online classes that I am not learning. It's like, study now, forget later. That is what always happens to me all the time.
The tentative of our limited face to face classes starts next month, April 4. And as it gets near, my mental health rapidly deteriorates. I am not confident. I have to study from the very start.
My department is still polishing the guidelines for our limited face to face classes and I am not quite sure if I'll go back to my boarding house or I'll just commute every time I have classes.
I am considering 3 things: schedule, budget, and resources.
I live two hours away from my school and I'm still weighing if the schedule is going to be too hard for me to travel every time I have classes. But I am also thinking of what I am going to do in my boarding house if I decide to stay there. What I am going to do if I don't have laboratory classes. I'll probably just sleep and slack my ass off there.
Since the inflammation rate has affected the price of gasoline, the cost of transportation is too high. The 70-80 pesos fare that I pay for a single ride costs 110 pesos now. So, going back and forth would cost me around 220 pesos already. And take note, my tricycle fare of 20 pesos is not yet included. My department is not located on the main road so I also need to take a pedicab going there and it costs 10 pesos for each ride. I almost forgot, I also need money for my food.
Estimated breakdown of my budget:
Bus fare: 220 pesos
Tricycle fare: 40 pesos
Pedicab fare: 20
Food allowance: 200 (estimated)
Total: 480 pesos
This is the budget that I will be needing every time that I will attend limited face to face classes. It's quite a big amount. Also, we're not rich and it would be too hard for my parents to give this amount.
One thing that I also consider is the resources. I have all the things that I need here at home that I don't have in my boarding house. E.g. Food, wifi, laptop, etc cetera. Going back there will just be too costly for me plus there is no good food there.
This news is what kept me thinking these past few days. It turned my world upside down. I am afraid of failing. I don't want to waste 3 years worth of med school. At this point, I am already doubting myself if I can. I need to grind more so that I can lessen the burden in my family. I just really hope that I'm going to be in a good state of mind.
P.S. this is a late post. I started to write this a week ago and I just have the energy to finished it tonight.
Author's Note:
Thank you for reading this! What are your thoughts regarding going back to school, are you ready or not?
Check out my previous blogs:
Kaya mo yan! Mahirap mag adjust ulit pero para tiwala lang. Good luck sayo 💛