Beauty in Pressure
Date: March 18,2022
Author: SequoiaShine bright like a diamond...
Oh common, don't sing it. Lol. Before anything else, I would like to greet you all a pleasant and beautiful morning. How's your sleep last night? I hope that you were able to have an awesome sleep and joyous dream. Well, I sleep bit late last night since I still have to make lesson plans for our requirements in Field Study two.
As you guys have known, I already started my internship and that caused me to be super occupied and pressured as well. This month, our schedule is Monday, Wednesday and Friday only but this coming April till June, I already need to find boarding house in the city near the school where I am having my internship because I have to go there every weekdays. I am so nervous with the upcoming face-to-face class. With all the stuffs running around my head, I can't help myself but to get pressured.
Pressure is what consuming me these past few days. Struggling on how to balance being a breadwinner and student at the same time. My family are already expecting me to graduate this year. In fact, they are so confident to the point that they already forgot to ask me if I am still fine. How am I coping up with everything? I mean, no one ever ask me in my family on how am I doing. If I am still eating on time, getting enough sleep and enjoying my life. No one dares to dive into my world of brokenness. They only see me as someone who will give them better life since I'll be the first member in the pack who will have a degree if the Lord allows.
They are all expecting me to perform well in my academic and support the whole family financially at the same time. Please don't get me wrong, I am not being greedy or what. It's just that, I am too tired of everything.
Just like what I have said, I'll be renting a room in the city for an easier and better access to the school. That means another expenses as well. However, instead of saying "focus on your study and personal expenses for now. We will be fine", I received, "What about us here? Where we will get food? Who will support your aunt? The bills? Make sure to go home every weekend and buy groceries, okay?"
I wanted to scream my heart out and admit that I am so exhausted. But I can't. I can't afford to see them starve if I will only think about myself. They are my responsibility. I have to do something.
Therefore, I cried when I saw this specific video in Facebook about a girl giving motivational speech to her co-students. She highlighted in her speech about the role of pressures in our lives. People will never see our sweats and blood but they will the result. Often, they would think that it is easy to reach the top without knowing the hardships that you've gone through just to get there. Bombarded with expectations and pressures. However, let's always remember that diamonds are form through pressures. With that being said, let us remember that we aren't being pressed to be broken, we are pressed to be the person that we are supposed to be.
"Pressures should not break us. It is meant to make us."
Disclaimer: Photos are not mine. It's from istockphoto.com
That's just life lods, just always bare in mind that at the end of the day, it molds you to be the person that endured all of this trials. I always tell this to people whom I have shared a time or close friends to just keep the grind steady and firm, for no matter what happens, family is always family. Its normal to feel the pressure lods and I know you can get through it all also. Hehe napasama pa tuloy ako sa umaasa haha