@Princessbusayo
more from that month
Relationship in marriage. Image Source https://images.unsplash.com/photo-1540076156429-35ffe82b7870?ixid=MnwxMjA3fDB8MHxzZWFyY2h8MTl8fGNvdXBsZXxlbnwwfHwwfHw%3D&ixlib=rb-1.2.1&auto=format&fit=crop&w=700&q=60
Yesterday, I talked about ***"Communication In Relationship"*** and I said *'Lack of Communication breeds Disorganization'*. You can check it out if you haven't. Do you know there won't be Communication if there is no Relationship? This is why I would be taking us into what Relationship in marriage really means . I know we have professionals on this platform who are into Relationship matters and I would want you to follow me and perhaps disagree with me on some things, only if you found one though 😁😁 I think it was a coincidence to have stumbled on an article and I decided to tag her so she can understand some things about this as it relates to what she has written. @Deeepensiverse wrote an article where she said marriage worries her and here is the link https://read.cash/@Deeepensiverse/marriage-worries-me-55a9866b Actually, to be sincere with us, we would get discouraged when we see marriages going through a lot in their homes and it looks as if we shouldn't risk our lives going into marriage at all. But is that true? We still have some marriages that are existing and love is found in there. It all depend on the kind of foundation your marriage is laid on. Before proceeding, I want us to understand some points about relationship and here they are; We serve the God of Relationship ( remember, the Holy Trinity: God the Father, Son and Holy Spirit and they work together as one. That's relationship. The first need God has placed in the heart of man is the need for a relationship (we can see this in the Bible when He created Adam and said, "it is not good for a man to be alone" he created a relationship between Adam and Eve. Relationship means connection or association with two or more people. It may be a relationship between a father and son, mother and daughter, husband and wife, employer and his employee etc. Without a relationship, there won't be any association. Even when God sent Jesus into the world to save us, He related with Adam first and because he disobeyed God, He didn't want to leave us alone and this is why out of His love, He sent Christ to us. A relationship was activated between God and Man. If there is no need for a relationship, God wouldn't have ordained marriage. We need to understand that God is the initiator of Marriage and Relationship. One of the importance of Relationship is found in Ecclesiastes 4:9-12. Two are better than one. When a person falls, the other would try lifting him or her up. ****The purpose of Relationship is to be of an helping hand to one another.**** In a house that is full of chaos every day, no understanding, no agreement between them. It means the relationship wasn't built on the foundation of God. This is why many marriages have crumbled because God isn't allowed in it. When God has hand in the relationship of two people, even though there is challenges in it, it will rise up again if they call onto God. An author of a book I am reading recently said something. *When God ordains relationships, it depends on the people in it to keep it growing and if such home falls, then it means there is a* ***"Fifth Columnist".*** *Who is a Fifth Columnist? This is someone who allows the devil to take over and controls the home. It might be from the wife or husband. This is why you shouldn't allow third party in your home. In a situation where the wife is listening to her friend or someone who keeps dictating to her on how to run her home, by disobeying the husband or fighting back her husband in any situation, the wife is the fifth columnist because she has allowed a force to help her run her home in a bad way.* **Do you now understand?** There is no relationship between two people without both of them actively participating in it. The task is not left for one alone. Both of them are in it and should work together to make progress. In a relationship, there must be contribution among both parties. There are differences in relationship between two people in marriage. ****MINIMAL RELATIONSHIP:**** When we talk about "Minimal", it means something that is little, there is no real engagement in it. Some marriages are just the type that do not relate so well in the home. Just "hi" "hello" . There is no commitment to the relationship. They hardly have time for themselves and this keeps them at a distance from each other. In this type of relationship, they wouldn't be able to understand or study each other and this is what causes fight among them. ****MODERATE RELATIONSHIP:**** This is different from minimal relationship because there is some kind of emotional attachment between both. When a partner travels, the other is expecting him or her to be back soon. ****STRONG AND QUALITY RELATIONSHIP:**** This is the strongest relationship between minimal and moderate because there is this strong and binding connection between both. Partners aren't ashamed to see each other's nakedness. They are free with each other. They don't hide feelings or secret. They prefer to open up with each other instead of keeping it to themselves. There are laws in relationships which I would be talking about in my next article to avoid writing a long post. Thanks for reading and stay tuned to my blog for the next part. |October 13, 2021|
43 comments
What if it's just civil wedding? Can we say that it's God-centered relationship? Because in here some people would say that it's only church wedding that they consider as a formal and the right way to marry if we want God to be the center of the relationship.
I want you to believe that whether marriage done in the church or outside the church, if God is in it or you both come together to allow God control your affairs, it is definitely God centered. The joy of having a beautiful Relationship together is when you pray to God concerning the relationship or marriage.
The only thing that is necessary for a marriage to be legal and godly is that the man pays the woman's bride price. God has no hands in anything else we do today in the name of marriage. Religion are responsible for all that you see today. Whether you wed in your backyard or in the kitchen, as long your bride price has been paid honorably your marriage fulfill the order of God. You only need to pray to guide to make right decisions for your marital life.
Fifth columnists ruin things most of the time, they give advice that they can't follow. I understand it better now, thank you, thank you for the mention too
I am glad you understood it. Thank you for coming around.
I have the same question with Marinov.
I just answered her which I believe would answer your questions 🤗
Thank you for the answer, Princess :)
First of all, I hate that we have so many rules and judgments between two people in their relationship which is personal to them alone...
Things should be kept personal between couples and not talking it out to anyone except there is need for it.
The saying that there are three persons in one God is what I really dont get but to say they all work to compliment all efforts is but a welcomed idea for me. God is God and ca never share his glory with anyone
You can check 1 John 5:17 to understand that part🤗
It's my first time knowing about the "Fifth columnist" concept. I learned a lot from this. Thanks! I am happy you're tackling about relationships. :)
I am glad you learned. I also was surprised when I got to know about it and thank God it's part of what I am gaining.
I am beginning to think of going into a relationship with all these lessons coming from your article🤣🤣🤣. Fifth columnist! First time am hearing that, although I know people who destroys another person marriage exist.
🤣🤣🤣 if you understand the principle in a relationship, why not? You are free to go into that. Afterall, you are a man
I am a boy ooo😅😅😅
😅😅😅
I like to have a relationship where modesty is the watchword. Too many rules makes it a boring affair altogether.
I read Deepens' article yesterday night too. I agree with you and also need to add a little. One of the cogent reasons why relationships fail is that "Love isn't enough". When the relationship starts love is always hot but with time it dwindles. Why? . You realise the lady/man you marry isn't perfect, he isn't the most handsome, he isn't the richest, he has some habits that you don't like. This is where perseverance , determination and contentment comes in. Even if a relationship is sanction by God ,if the couples don't have this attributes. It is bound to fail.
God bless you for this comment. This is very right. Couples need to understand all these to have wonderful time together.
Enhancing effective communication in relationships is key in sustaining it.
You are right. Thank you
Communication is the sole of every business, same thing applies to relationship, if we want a build va strong foundation for relationship, we should not underestimate the power of communication, if not it will collapse . If a relationship is not working as it should be , there must be something wrong somewhere which has to be fixed. There's are still some long distance relationship that work out well because there's is understanding between them. Majority of people don't do what they are expected to do to keep their relationship, all they want is what they will get. And the question is , what did we offer in a relationship ? Is all those things that will build it or or the toxic things that will brake it up.... Just a question for us to answer!, Will be expecting the next article ma'am, I know it gonna be interesting.
Wow! I can see another beautiful relationship speaker here 🤗🤗 you have made a valid point and a question to ponder on.
I think the first statement that there wont be communication without relationship should have been without relationship there wont be communication. There are so many things that happens to us humans that has nothing to do with God, and one of those things is in a marriage. God has set everything in their order and set laws to govern them, if will follow the rules we enjoy the benefits, if we chose to go against the rules we faced the consequences. There is nothing God can do about them, he made all things beautiful in his time. So many people spend a lot of time praying to God to make their marriage work when they are the ones to do the work. God cant work out anything we have not work in. It is not God that would teach a woman to be submissive to her husband, nor is it God that would make a man chose to neglect his wife, it is left to us to chose how we want our life and relationship to go. Marriage is work, if you don't work it, it will never work out. Those getting ready to go into marriage must be ready a life time work if they want to enjoy their marriage.
Yes, this is why I said it all depends on both partners to make the relationship work when God has done His part. He will not come down to organize for them. When there is a disarray in the home, it means there is a fifth columnist in it.
Where there is no God there can't be love and where there is no love there can't be relationship and where there is no relationship am sure there can't be communication
I agree with you Sis. Thank you so much.
You are always welcome
Is better for two people (before getting married) to have a proper conversation on how the relationship is going to be after marriage. Cause some people usually change after marriage.
It really needs both partners to study each other and be opened before going into the marriage.
Have been married for 6 years now. The relationship is based on mutual respect, understanding, and lots of love. We try to keep love alive every day. 💓
Great! This align with my next post coming soon. Thank you for your input.
I feel you there, mama. It's relationship because it has to be relational and it's not one-ship as most people do... It has to be mutual, you have to both sacrifice, you have to meet each other half way and do the best with each other in mind.
Thank you Popsy Dara 🤗🤗 you have said it well and partners should be mutually connected or else, it won't go down well.
🤗🤗🤗
True relationship is a sincere bondingq between two peoples. But many of them don't respect the relationship called marriage. 70% of the marriages are at stake due to ego.
Ego destroys relationship and some are ignorant. It takes a wise person to understand this.
I love the strong relationship Aspect and it’s what I wish for. Come to think of it Having a great time in relationships really matters a lot. And can define one way of living. So I see marriage as something we have to be careful of the steps we take and make sure to keep prayers our priority.
You are right. I also want to get to that strong relationship stage. Thank you for your input.
I agree relationship is necessary to make the marriage to stay long. But sadly there are only few people who truly care for strong relationship before engaging in marriage.
Some couples still want to keep doing what they were doing when they were single, they aren't mature or ready for it and this causes trouble.