Am I in love again? 🤔

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1 year ago

I am not the type that has this time for ladies, most times I joke a lot and when ladies feel I make them laugh so much then they would just keep beating and beating thinking they are playing. So I made up my mind to reduce my interactions with ladies especially when it comes to joking.

This got to the extent that I don’t even have many feelings for ladies again since I have been ignoring them and limiting my time and actions with them. It continued like that for years and I could feel changes in my life. But how would I cope with my wife if I had to continue this way?

I had to tell myself, “you have to start relating with them again and make sure you learn how to control yourself”. I understood the message I passed across to myself and I decided to go for a girl I felt I would like over time.

Yeah, it worked out. She accepted me and I started to maintain my first relationship with a girl. It wasn’t really bad as a first-timer but I noticed something strange about the relationship. She is always the “asking” type and not ready to support. I felt I already pushed myself into this. So there is no backing out. I made a write-up about her, don’t know maybe it’s on this platform or others I am not so certain.

Then all of a sudden there was a day Mum called me to ask about my relationship with her, I said nothing much. Then she told me to forget about her. I took the step with immediate effect and broke up. Since I already started to have some ill feelings about her.

It broke my heart and hers too, she kept asking the reason for the sudden break up for days but I gave no answer. I was just so sorry.

Since then I never asked any lady out because I don’t want what happened at first to happen again. Not until my 3rd year in the university that I came across this lady. I had a crush on her but it seems she never noticed me. So I decided to throw my card. I expressed myself to her but she never gave a direct response. She seems to like me but something is holding her back. I thought she was trying to play hard not until I realized that ever since I have been calling her on my call log and messages, she never called me or messaged me once. That’s when I realized she is a no-go area for me.

I suffered another heartbreak but it was just for a little while. I moved on with my life. Meanwhile, my relationship with ladies kept on reducing after each experience.

Fast forward to my after-school days and when to go for our youth service corps. I met a lady. We were on the same bus to the state where I was deployed. Seems she was a friend to a friend of mine. From there I knew her name and nothing more.

We camped for 21days and I have gotta see her often, but I just wave at her and move on. I can’t experience another breakup again. After camping all of my friends moved to another state. But I remained where I was posted. I got my place of primary assignment and tried settling down. The next morning it was this same lady I saw next door.

I approached her and she said she was also posted to the same place of primary assignment. I was at least happy that I would have someone to talk to again. I won’t be lonely after losing all my friends.

I got her contact number since she is the only one I knew partially from camp and the same bus too. Then gradually we got fond of each other and our chat became more consistent. From there I felt some attraction towards her. I don’t know if she has any. But I could feel it.

Right now I am in a state of confusion as to whether I should express my feelings to her or just keep the friendship going between us. And I don't know if I am ready to love again after a long time.

To my Sponsors, readers, commenters, tippers, and upvotes maker. I am using this medium to say a big "THANK YOU" to you all. Without you my page is nothing. I appreciate you all. 

©Adeleye

10:35 pm Thursday, 20th January 2022.

IT IS NOT GOODBYE 👋 BUT SEE YOU AGAIN

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1 year ago

Comments

Hahahah😆. I have passed through all these stages you mentioned and I'm on one🤣. To me, keep the friendship for now, build your space in her heart first till she start to crave for your presence, then strike. But some other way, the more you delay the more the chance of her being chased by another. So be fast with your friendship with her

$ 0.05
1 year ago

Wow. Wise one from my boss. Maybe I should take you my relationship advisor 😂 😂. You said it right. I am trying to keep the friendship. But I don’t think she is yet to crave my presence.

And I would try my best to strike ASAP. 😂. I hope I don’t strike my penalty kick to corner kick

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1 year ago

This is not love..this is respect I think

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1 year ago

Okay. That’s right. I would see to it

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1 year ago

Control on emotions and feelings in relationship is key . Anything beyond the limits hurts always. For love my theory is " we love (by heart& soul) only once in life . We can't bring back that ( first love) originality again so remaining are may prove good relationship but not love.

$ 0.02
1 year ago

Hummmn. Words! I really appreciate your contribution. Love should be sincere and come from the heart and soul.,

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1 year ago

Not love. Admiration maybe haha

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1 year ago

Wow. I have been expecting you ma’am crush 😻. So it’s just a mere admiration and not love?. I would make sure to work on that. I thought I started to love again 😞

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1 year ago