Date: May 16, 2022

Are you a parent or a guardian? Are you with a child most of the time? If yes, you know how a cry of a child means. They might be needing or wanting something right? But do you know that not all the time that they will cry, we will say yes to them. We will talk about it now.

Hello my dear read.cash family. How are you this time? I really hope so that everyone is in good health. We all need a good health right? So, keep hydrated by drinking lots of water specially this summer season. Water plays a vital role in one's health.

A child cry over a toy

Yesterday, we had our Bayanihan in the church but men is the most needed in the work. So, women is in charge to prepare and cook food for our lunch and merienda. Some of our churchmate went here in our new small house to cook for food. One of our churchmate brought her son with her. So, her son is playing silently enjoying my son's toy car. It is okay with my son because he also wants to play with the child.

When we are about to leave to bring the food, the child doesnt want to go out without a toy car. He play with different toys but he likes the most that yellow toy car and wanted to bring it with him.

The child cry loudly and I felt pity on him. I told her mom at first just to bring it and then return it when his son done playing with it. Her mom agreed with me but after a seconds I remember our experience with my son regarding with the same situation. I told her that before I never let my son bring anything from a friend, a neighbor, a churchmate or anyone because I am worried that he may grow thinking that he could get anything through crying. I just let him cry. Then, she decided to get the toy car and leave it while his son is crying even more.

Is it right that I told her about it? It seems that I don't want her son to borrow my son's toy. But for me, I just share how I handle my son regarding that matters.

Our own experience

One day, we visited our God parents (Ninong and ninang sa kasal). They have a grandson who has a lot of toys. We can see toys everywhere. His father is a police man and for sure he could afford to buy a lot of toys for his son. My son who is 2 or 3 years old that time is enjoying his toys with him. To make the long story short, we decided to go home and as expected, a child wants a toy. My son wanted a particular toy and he cried over it. The grandpa said to his grandson to give that toy to my son and never minds about it because he has a lot of toys. His grandson is kind enough and agreed with his grandpa to give that toy to our son. But, I told our God father (ninong) this:

Ninong, we are glad to know that your grandson is willing to give it to Sam-sam (our son), thank you so much but we cannot accept it. Please don't be mad or please don't think negative about it ayaw lang namin na masanay sya na everytime we will visit a home and he find something interesting to him, iiyak lang sya para makuha nya ang gusto nya. It is not good, right? We will just let him cry, dont worry he will stop crying very soon.

Our Ninong agreed and understand our side. That is not the only experience we have about it but it happened many times from different houses and we did the same thing.

The result of saying No

As our son grows, he learned to understand that when visiting someone's house he could play freely but make sure to return and leave toys there. He didn't own it, he just borrowed it, so never bring it home.

We are happy that he understands about it now. One day he went to his friend's house and play there. I don't know what is their conversation there but he runs home and told me, Mama kuya Chaz want to give me a toy, he said that it is damaged (Remote control car but didn't function well now) but it is still good to play. Will I accept it?

I never thought that he will ask permission from me to accept it or not. I told him that if he will give it to him and he likes it then why not? I asked him what to say if kuya Chaz will give it to him. He said "Thank you" and ran back to his friend's house.

He went home with an additional toy car. Accepting it is far different if we allow to accept a toy when he is still young and cry over it. This time, he never cry over it, but a friend freely give it to him and he is hesitant to accept it and ask my permission.

Closing thoughts

Not all cry should be given. Not all cry should be answered with yes. We can say No if we know that saying No is the right thing to do.

How we train or how we react in the early years of a child will have a big impact when they grow. So, as parents let us help our child become a good child, a good student, a good citizen someday.

Disclaimer:

I am not a perfect mother, we are not a perfect parents nor our son is perfect but I am just sharing this experience hoping to help a parent or a mother like me.

Thank you for reading. I hope you
learn something.