These all started when we were just kids specifically toddlers. We began to be curious on many things. Like how this and that things differs from each other, why they look like that, why they act that way. As kids, we made lots of experiments out of curiosities. We tend to be confused on many things like we called all animals with four legs as dogs or cats because that’s what our parents told us, so if we see a dog then we called a cat as a dog because what we thought of an animal with four legs are dogs. Questions started to arise when we were just toddlers.
Confusion starts, Curiosity begins and Questions were started to build in our minds.
Questions ? ? ?
Well, these are the things that will sometimes ruins our minds especially if we had the hardship in seeking it’s answers. These are the things that made us curious on something. The things that will came up in our mind out of disappointments in life.
I knew all of us, had our different kinds of questions depending on what are the things that made us curious. A questions that are made out of confusions and a questions which are due to our negative thoughts.
Questions out of negative thoughts...
Since we are just human being, I think it’s already part of our nature as human to think negatively especially if we are experiencing downfalls in life. When we are in times of troubles and in times of hardships. We tried to be positive at all times, we tried to radiates and seeks positivity despite our downfalls but still we can’t deny that there were always a time, a single time that we thought negatively and even our mind creates questions of why we felt, suffer and experienced terrible things in life.
Why me of all people?
When I experienced the worst part of my life, I always asked myself WHY ME OF ALL PEOPLE SUFFERS THIS WAY? I know that this type of question were out of my negative thoughts. A question that is bombarded with negativities. Maybe you’d wonder why? Well, I’m not saying that what I experienced is the worst for others because I also knew we had different stories and different definitions of what are the worst that happens to us, so do I.
I already shares in here my experienced when I had allergy attacks. For me, every time this allergy attacks me I really felt the pain, the itch, can’t breathe properly, high fever, headache, LBM, and most worst is stomach ache which causes me to vomit every single minute. Due to vomiting, sometimes I get dehydrated. I’ve been admitted to the hospital a lot of times because of this especially when I can hardly breathe already. That is why every time I had this attack, I always asked why me? I’m not rich though, my parents cannot afford my medications every time I had this attack so why me?
Another part of my life which I considered it as the worst part in my 23rd of existence in this world is when I was being diagnosed to have bipolar stage 1 but before that happens I've been attacked first by my allergy, so imagine the pain here I mentioned it above. Then after I recovered from that said attack, within that week I again had fever, high fever actually. I suffer fever for one week, then after that since I'm already dehydrated and can't totally get up my parents decided to see a doctor and again I was admitted for one week in the hospital because of dengue. Since, that time I was in my 3rd year in college, of course I was very eager to get back to school. So, after 2 days of being discharged from the hospital I already get back to school because I knew that I'm already left behind from all the subjects. I got discharged Monday, then on Wednesday I already get back to school. So, I only had one day of rest after being admitted to the hospital for one week. So, when I get back school of course many paper works that I must done within that week because I was already beyond the deadline. Of course, I got busy of that paper works not knowing that most of the times I skip eating meals. Sometimes I just go to sleep with an empty stomach and goes to school in the morning without eating breakfast were in fact I must not doin this way because I just recovered from dengue.
Therefore, with that style I had in that week. Saturday on the same week, I broke down. Early in the morning of that day, I just woke up crying so hard then at I guess that was 7:00am I already started to be out of mind as in I've been like crazy. I can't control talking, so I talked and talked nonsense that time. So, within that day my parents immediately went to the nearest hospital that has a psychiatric clinic but it was 3 hours of ride from our home. So, it's quite far. When I get their, I was being diagnose to have bipolar stage 1, and according to my Psychiatrist that time my normal IQ became triple which leads to the abnormalities of my left brain if I'm not mistaken. I suffered that for one day, as in whole Saturday and that week was really the worst week I had in my existence.
That is why after all of that, I again asked myself, Why am I suffering all of this? What did I do wrong to experienced all of this?
This kind of experienced I had leads me to question that way and I the worst part there is I even question God on the things that happens to me.
Because of what our experiences and all the hardships we encountered, we tend to QUESTION ourselves, our existence and even God for all of it were in fact it is not the right thing to do.
When, I started to realized things and reflects from it I learned that it is not right to questioned to anyone even ourselves because first and foremost we are living in the world full of challenges and we must be ready for all of that, we must bare with that. Instead, we should try our best to look for what is it's positive side why all this things happen to us, maybe because God wanted us to be tough and be ready in everything that may still happens to us.
Thinking positively is one way that we can't able to create and formulates some questions out of our negative thoughts.
It's normal for us to have lots of questions because we are just humans, but what is not normal there is when our questions were being formulated because of our negative thoughts. It will just only ruins our positive thinking and our life.
~end~
So, this will be my entry to @JonicaBradley prompt #5 about QUESTIONS. Since, I can relate to the said prompt so I tried to make an article for it. Thank you so much for this prompt, I was able to express my thoughts by writing this article.
Happy reading!!!
Just want to thank the upvoters of my previous article entitled Blissful day with the Great Fathers in my Life @Jane @OfficialGamboaLikeUs @Bloghound @Eunoia Thank you, Thank you from the deepest of my heart.
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You can also checked my related articles to this:
Being immune to anti-allergy pill
Ayy nakahilak ko te. Hahaha i was there man gud when you suffered that time. I do not know it feels but I know you've been in so much pain that time. I hope you are doing great now. Of all what happened, its a challenge. God knows that you can endure it and you can get through it. Pray lang gyud and He will do the rest. 💕