Missing Each Other

November 12, 2021

Have you experienced to be in a long distance relationship? How was it for you? Does your relationship worked out in that scenario?

I've heard a lot of stories about a long distance relationships from the people I've known and most of their relationships failed. Some were also able to surpassed on that kind of set up. Well, every relationships have different stories to tell anyway. Whatever it's kind of set up. But I'll have to talk on a long distance kind of set up in this article.

I've actually been into many long distant relationships before. I have an ex were we broke up because of such set up. Well, in the first place were not in a long distance relationship because we always seen each other since were just living in the same barrio. But when he went to Manila to work which is very far from our place. It's from Luzon part and our place is from Visayas part. I guess it's just a month after he flew to Manila then we broke up. The reason was misunderstanding and it's hard to fixed it when were far away from each other. Then the following relationships I had still in a long distance just like once or twice in a month we've seen each other, still it doesn't worked out for me.

Then I met someone from same boarding house were I'm staying when I was still in my 3rd year college. We both understand each other then later on we became girlfriend and boyfriend. We were in an intimate relationship to the point the we already shared a room in our boarding house were like living in partners. That's actually our set-up for a year. We've been together all days seeing each other everyday and even every night. Because of intimacy, I became pregnant and that is our son now. For me, I thought that our relationship worked out because were seeing each other everyday unlike in my past relationships that are mostly long distance.

But, the time of my pregnancy I've stayed at my parents house and he my partner stayed at a boarding house since he was still studying. During weekends he went home in my parents place there we see each other. That was our set-up until I gave birth. During weekends he went home to my parents place where I'm living but sometime he went home to his hometown which is far from our place with my parents.

Then, here comes the pandemic. The reason why we'd undergone and been engaged into a long distance relationship. That time they stopped going to school because that was the declaration of the mass lockdown in every municipalities and provinces. Then, he was at his hometown at that time and were not allowed to travel because of the strict policies of the lockdown. Therefore, were enduring the long distance relationship with almost a year with just chatting, sometimes cannot communicate with him because our place doesn't have signal. We still need to go somewhere else to have a better signal then the fact that we can't easily go out due to the lockdown implementation that time. So, it's really hard in my part.

For almost a year of being in that kind of long distance thing. A lot happened between us. We argued always through chats, texts or calls. I always made him angry and I'll always start arguing with him on some little things. Because I made little things a big deal. I always said to broke up with him that time but he just refuses anytime I said that to him because what he always said to me that I'm in the mood of anger and he will just listens to me breaking up with him if I'm not angry. I don't know, because before in that almost a year of being away from each other I also suffered from post-partum depressions that's why even with just some little things I made it a big deal and argued with him many times. This is one of the reason why I hate being in a long distance because sometimes when I missed someone badly I tend to argue instead to send some sweet messages.

I had this kind of attitude that I hate the most of myself. I don't know. Maybe I'm just like this. I'm just lucky that my partner at this time understand how I felt. I know sometimes his somehow tired because I always argued with him and I knew he doesn't like that. When were together, we just rarely have fights but that time when were apart from each other every week we had a fight and I don't even dare to chat him for a week once we had a fight. He will always be the one who find ways to communicate back to me. Maybe he knows how post-partum really is because he acts that way. I really expect him to get out in our relationship that time. But good thing we able to survived in that kind of challenged that we both faced and learnt some lessons from it. Maybe were adjusting that time, or I'm adjusting that time since I'm used to be with him days and nights for a year. Maybe that's one of the reason aside from the fact I also suffered a post-partum depression.

Then, recently. As I've shared also in here that I was hired and now working at my college alma mater and this school were also far from our home their at my partner's hometown. Again, we are in a long distance set-up for the second time. Since it's been 3 weeks that we haven't seen each other. But this time it's not like before that every time we chats we always argued. I'm happy that I'm not like what I used to be before when I'm far from my partner. Maybe times had passed as well made me more mature. Because before, I felt like I was so immature if only I'm not in a depression due to giving birth. Now, we missed each other everyday. Even we chat everyday but it's really different when were together. The bond is different. It felt like a day passed that has something has something empty or that wasn't filled in. Maybe because, were always been together for several months then suddenly been away from each other again for almost a month now.

Well, actually. I planned to get home there at our rented house every weekend. But sad to say this past three weeks I wasn't able to get home because I'm thinking on the money I'll be wasting for the fare knowing that my salary was delayed. Good thing last Wednesday our salary from October was already given. Therefore, I can now able to get home. Since, he said he also missed badly our son. So, I will be going home there tomorrow and I planned to left him our son for the following weeks.

That's how we missed each other everyday.

A big thanks to social medias because this is one of the way to somehow lessen our feeling of missing out each other.

This is just my thoughts of the day. A nonsensical article. Apologized for that.

Have a great day forward!!!

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