Some hurt will always be part of us. It makes us grow to a strong person. They don't define us, but they serves us our daily reminder of the unforseen challenges that may came in our way.
We've done everything to help ourselves. But then again one day we wake up with a familiar ache in our heart. We distract ourselves with many things, like exercising, travelling, working extra time, and etc. but still the pain we felt remains. Even if we forget it briefly for a moment, it return soon after. A distressing reminder that nothing really changed.
The hurts that never heal are rarely discussed openly and denied. We tend to comfort ourselves with words of encouragement, that everything will be fine. But deep down in our hearts, the pain is haunting us and it sometimes grow deeper.
Common hurt that won't heal
Death of a loved one. This is perhaps the deepest hurt that everyone experience, although we know that everyone will go through. When the people we loved is taken away from us, especially when it happen unexpectedly, we struggle to go on or move on. Everyday, we rememeber them then suddenly we reminded that they are gone, leaving a space in our heart that may never be filled.
Addiction. This a particularly cruel affliction because the person we loved is still there but they are no longer themselves. Witnessing someone we love fall into addiction is a hurt that is truly heart-wrenching.
Chronic illness. The thought of possibly having an illness is indeed a heartbreaking. We refused to believe that it is true. We start to think of the people that we may leave behind. We struggle with the fear that our condition may be worse.
Betrayal. A betrayal by someone we loved and trust cuts really deep. We trouble trusting others and push them away because of the fear that they will hurt us again. Betrayal not only makes us doubt others but it also makes us doubt ourselves.
Permanent injury. Daily tasks that were simple before now take a great deal of effort on doing. People we will look at us with great sorrow and pity that makes us feel pathethic small. We wish that it never happens but we were forced to lived with it. Realization hurts.
Trauma. Trauma leaves an imprint that endure and can change the course of our life. When it is activated, time and space stop and we find ourselves trapped in the feeling of terror. That terror may live inside us quietly or overwhelm us in any moment.
How to cope with hurt
Turn hurt into a mission. We are hurt and we know its feeling. Lets channel the hurt in a profound sense of mission. As we are given another chance to live, lets make each moment to give hope and help others who undergo same experience with us. Helping others will not only trigger healing in them, but it also triggers healing us as well.
Share your pain. A support group or group therapy is wonderful and safe way to practice opening our heart and letting others get close to us. Communicate with others who suffered similar experience. Isolation is the enemy of healing. It makes us more in pain and depression.
Keep growing. Grieving our pain is important but it doesn't have to dominate our life. Don't give hurt the power over us by playing the victim. Acknowledge it and move forward despite of what we are feeling.
Hurt is our reminder that life is fragile and also life is precious. It inspire us to live in the moment and appreciate life more.
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Thanks for sharing