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Understanding complexes is one of the psychological tools we need for life. Identifying and making sense of our complexes opens many doors and helps us to understand ourselves, since we build our personality on them. Most of the time they are also loose "pieces" in our structure, because many of the complexes are built on episodes or ideas that have left us marked. Complexes and traumas are intimately linked. A complex contains all the conscious and unconscious thoughts, feelings, memories, sensations, and, above all, self-protection, both learned and innate, that are associated with a trauma.
In that sense, we understand as trauma a situation that is experienced with strong feelings and in which the sensation or perception of threat appears, which in turn, must be explained logically with a thread of thoughts. A comment, a person, a place, an aroma, etc. that has been associated with the situation described above transports us to the whole. It activates the feeling of threat and by extension the defense mechanisms. Mechanisms that prepare us to react to a subjective reality that may be very different from the one that actually exists. One of the essential tasks in life, if you want to be a conscious person and control your existence, is to explore your complexes in your consciousness. You cannot always prevent them from going off, but you can learn to spend less time on them.
Well, another reason to understand a complex is to understand what is going on when someone else is involved in one. When someone else is involved in your complex, the relationship with that person is more emotional. The reactions we have when we relate to that person or they are present in some way, everything seems more negative, more intense, more threatening. You feel defensive, blamed, labeled. Everything around you seems to conspire to highlight that which makes you feel inferior. People with complexes are usually people who feel insecure and inferior to others. They are often tormented, bitter, uncomfortable and reject the natural changes of life. In addition, they often have self-esteem problems.
In the same vein, not all complexes are overcome in the same way, and in some cases professional support is necessary. Always look for the positive side of things, enhance one's own virtues and be realistic, knowing what you have and where you can get to are some ways to overcome these complexes. In addition, it is very positive to set challenges and goals that are close and accessible to reinforce self-esteem. Normally, behind a complex hides an unfulfilled expectation. The vast majority of people who suffer from some kind of complex may tell us that "life is not as they expected" or "I do not have the body I would like". When we imagine how things should be, we tend to hold on to that expectation.
In conclusion, today we live in a society that demands unrealistic perfection from us. We must have the best bodies, more money than anyone else, the best job, appear absolutely happy on social networks. We are created an expectation of perfection that is impossible to achieve. So, it is not difficult to get carried away by this current maelstrom and feel frustrated and self-conscious about not meeting the imposed expectations. I believe that the best way to overcome complexes is to know that everyone is as they are and not to compare ourselves with anyone. We should all go our own way as best we can and be happy with what we have. Of course we can go for more, but always being happy with what we have in the present. Few feelings can be more cathartic, satisfying and liberating than letting go of our hang-ups.
Have you ever had to deal with complexes?
Disclaimer: I would like to let you know that English is not my mother tongue, I may even make some mistakes in the elaboration of sentences in my posts. Feel free to correct me attentively. It will help me in my learning process.
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