Sobriety

What a day yesterday was. I almost went out of my mind looking for the solution to my phone when it suddenly went out of service. Yes, that was what I thought when in between a chat my messages stop delivering neither was I receiving any. I thought it was my SIM, so I went ahead to subscribe on another, only to receive a call from a friend about this same issue. Maybe it’s “the beginning of the Apocalypse” as @Temimay suggested in his article.

I can’t help feeling sober, just one of these times when you feel something is wrong but you can’t just point your finger at what it is. I feel tired. Not the physical tiredness, it’s something I can’t explain with words. I feel like I’m going about with a huge weight on my shoulder but the need to move on makes me press on. Maybe what ate Jane said will help me do justice to it. I’m tired, but this is my purpose in life - that’s the title she gave it. I realise what has been the driving force behind my unrelenting strive for success was the need to make my loved one’s happy.

My mind then wonder to ate @Ruffa ‘s article “A Dream Is a wish your heart makes” as she said she sees how other people are living their lives, graduating from school, leaving home in search of greener pasture, working and earning. That’s almost everyone’s dream but what do you do when you are unemployed and things don’t look like it’s changing anytime soon. It’s when we come to realise that there are various routes to a single destination that’s when we will find joy. It doesn’t necessarily need to be the way we planned it. We don’t need to be envious of other’s life. We will be surprised if we listen to them talk about their struggles. Some even wish to be like you.

My wondering mind then started thinking of the future. What does life have in store for me? Society has its expectation, though I’m not moved by what they say, but my parents are there. They are the typical African parents who believe there’s a time range for everything. Someday they will ask that question. “When are you planning to settle down”. I know it’s still far but I can’t help wondering “ will I be a good husband? Or a good father to my kids?”. Being a good father is different from being a good husband. Do I have it in me to be a good one?

Love dwindles sometimes as @Giddyboy said in his article “ Marriage, love and my opinion”. will I marry the one I love or love the one I marry? I asked myself. Beauty fades with time and age or circumstance. @George_Dee talked about “A Beautiful scar” . will I be able to see the beauty in such a scar? . Won't i aldo look for excuses to push her away? Will i complain that she's fat or noisy?. They say It’s easy to criticize people when we are not in their shoes. I hope I don’t turn out to be an irresponsible father or husband. Hope situations and circumstances won’t change me.

“Life happens” are the first words @King_Gozie used in his Tackling the toughest Questions . so I’m going to ignore my questions for now and let life take its course. When we get to each bridge we’d cross it. I won't let the thought of what tomorrow will be disturb my today.

Thanks for reading! 😔💚😔

Sorry for the tags guys. If you will to join the trend/challenge feel free to join.

This is an entry for the challenge by @McJulez to “connect each title to make a story”. also in respect to the challenge passed on by ate Jane.

Special thanks to @PVMihalache for the sponsorship. It's an honour to have your badge on my page. Thanks a lot.