Sometimes it's better to let someone go

A story as old as time itself, it's unhealthy to hold on to things that aren't yours. This is a case of knowing the right thing to do but being unable to go through with it.

I told myself I wouldn't write about love since it usually acts as a form of a trigger to my mental health but since I'm already feeling that way, what is the worst that could happen?

Exactly 1 year ago around this time, I was still in a toxic relationship even though at the time I hadn't realized it yet. My friends advised me to quit the toxic relationship, I knew it was the right thing to do, yet every single time I tried to end it, I found another reason to stay. It got so bad that it was obvious no amount of advice could change me from the path I had chosen for myself. I knew exactly where it was headed and I went on with it.

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Hello friends, here's an article based on my experience and what life has taught me, you might find some of the things I will write upsetting so I would like to apologize in advance. You might also pick up a free lesson along the way so you won't make the same mistakes I did. I'm glad I made the mistake because I was able to learn that way but I wish I had just avoided it completely so I wouldn't be in so much hurt.

I used to be a big fan of "soulmates" and "love at first sight" kind of situations but everything changed after I met this girl. I saw the red flags but turned a blind eye to it thinking it would change with time but it never did, it only got worse.

I couldn't even focus on any serious thing for too long without this lady coming at me for one reason or the other. Little by little I started to lose my good friends and I still didn't see what was wrong with it. Love (or whatever that was) must be really blind. Even a blind man could see that it was heading to the pits.

One time, I had had enough and needed to stop, so I ended it only for me to fall back into the same old pattern a few days later. What is it about this girl that keeps bringing me back? - I thought to myself.

It was like a drug, once you are addicted to it, you find it very hard to stop and if you eventually manage to do that, the tendency to relapse is always a risk especially if the drug is within sight.

I really did try to let it all go, but my efforts bore no fruits, it's fruitless trying to advise anyone who thinks they are in love. I was self-aware of the damage I was doing to my health but I still stayed anyways. It felt like I was in a prison and I couldn't escape even though I had the keys in my hands.

Everyone has the limits they can take, I had finally gotten to mine, I had to let her go. I had to let it all go. It was finally time to let go of all the toxicity. It took a lot of courage and my mind was already made up. What is the point of being in a relationship when you are nothing but miserable?

It was one of the hardest things I had to do but every day I wake up and I'm just glad I did. At the very moment I ended it, I felt free, like a heavy load had just been released from my weary shoulders. I could smile again, the world just seemed different. I felt like myself again.

If you are in such a situation where you are no longer happy with your partner and every effort you have put into the relationship to make things better remain futile, then I suggest it's time to accept your losses and move on. It's never easy but in the end, it's completely worth the effort. Your happiness should always be a priority.

I will also suggest counseling if you are determined to make it work and you can afford it. There have been cases where counseling helped solve such issues, but there is still a risk of slipping back into old habits. We only live once, in this lifetime, live your life to the fullest be happy.

During my last moments on this Earth, I want to look back and smile, knowing fully well that I lived my best life, don't you want that too?

• Lead Image Source: Unsplash