10/25/2021
Things just don't always go as expected. And as if it's not yet bad enough, worse things unexpectedly happen, that test our spirits. Should I push through, or stop now?
I've been in this situation lots of times. It's a continuous streaks of failures, mistakes after mistakes, worse days after bad ones, tears after tears, fears after rejections. Unmet expectations are such a pain in the bangs, even if you don't have one. And we are not hypocrites to just say the eagerness to pursue will stay the same. In reality, it wavers. It's always tempted to fly away.
Whenever we come into this point in life, there are suddenly lots of question marks on the way. Am I doing it wrong ever since? Should I just have listened to what they said? Will I really get there if I continue? Should I just accept that this is not for me?
Answering these questions, along with a thousand more, can be nerve-wracking. It's not an exaggeration when I say it could cause an emotional breakdown. It's the state of confusion, of crisis, that, unfortunately, only YOU, could ultimately solve.
While others may be influential enough to tell you what to do, the final say is still on you. At the end of the day, it's your mind who will command what's to be done. It's your heart that will dictate what direction you'd take. But what if you could not hear what your heart and mind say?
This is what I do. First, I take a break. Even this sounds like an irresponsible way to sort out our feelings, it's actually helpful. It's normal to have worries and mixed emotions that can be overwhelming, and just thinking about it more does not actually make it better, truth be told. So, I take at least a day, to just losen things up. Like a lady losening up her tight corset, she lets go and breathes better, finally. A relaxed mind works wonders. During this state, I can now start to clear out my clouded mind, and distinguish my heart's voice among lots of others.
This may include doing things that calm you. Personally, I do sleep. Or just lisyen to music. And pray. It's different for everyone, do what works for you.
After relaxing, I would either ask for others's advice or work it out myself. Most of the times, I do the latter. I am personally not inclined to sharing my burdens with other people; moreover, I find it exhausting to talk especially when I am struggling inside. So, I usually think things through alone. Again, this works differently for everyone. I also had 'Eureka' moments, thanks to friends' help and pieces of advice. It is also true that two heads are better than one.
After these two steps comes the final one. Decision making. Should we stop, or should we continue?
For this area, I know it's gonna be hrd to give a specific answer because it depends om the situation. However, let me share some things to consider whether you should not give up, or whether to let go.
Does doing it make you happy?
Does the outcome matter more than the means?
Do you think you are nearing the desired results you want?
Do you think it's worth it?
Are you still inspired to pursue this?
Is continuing more beneficial that giving up, or vice versa?
These are just some of the questions I ask myself. Most of the time, I get the answer "Continue".
While there are situations we may have to give up, let this be known to us that surrendering a battle does not mean we are incapable. It actually means we are meant for something more. Remember this, whenever you feel like giving up is a sin.
Taking that thought aside, we actually never know if we can unless we just go and try multiple times. We know practice does not make perfect, but it makes us improve and become better than the last time, until we achieve the desired results.
There is a story of two people who are mining diamond, James, and Lucas. James was further below the cave and has already dug a great part of the underground mine, initially enthusistic for the large diamond which was the talk of the town. However, one week into his seemingly vain attempt, he gave up. On the other hand, Lucas who was just a few meters behind James, followed through the path James left, and continued what was left of the deep hole. After almost three days of digging in the same area James left behind, Lucas jumped in joy when he finally found the large diamond hiding.
Is it luck, or hardwork? You judge. All I can say is, too bad for James. If he just put up with it a little more, he could have gotten that diamond he's worked for a week.
Sometimes, things in our lives are like that. Whenever we're about to give up, God helps us realize that we just need a little more push to see what's waiting at the end of the tiresome race. Failures are meant to prepare us to trimphs and victories, so I hope we'll continue to stay strong and hold on a little longer, because who knows? Your diamond is waiting a few meters below you, just waiting for more efforts.. A little bit more, and you'll finally see it shining before your eyes.
You'll soon be there, keep going, friend.
Another Rainy Monday!
Whoa, I really did not expect the strong rains! Is it still the same typhoon? Sigh.
Anway, these are just some of my insights while traveling home from work earlier this evening.I consider myself as a person who don't really have massive successes. But then I look back and realize I won many battles already, and those victories are because I did not choose to give up, but fought instead.
I hope you enjoyed reading my insights today. Until next time!
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Pause for a moment but never give up , it okay to take a rest but continue to hold on...Laban lang!!