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Me, my friends and some questions

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Written by   85
2 months ago

There is a famous phrase that begins..."I am me and my circumstances" by the Spanish philosopher José Ortega y Gasset. Perhaps it could be applied to more things, like friendship, so we would say “I am me and my friends”. And about friends and friendship I am going to reflect here now with some words and telling experiences, thanks to the inspiration of a friend here from Read.cash @Coolmidwestguy who has written in his article "Friend questions" those questions that I also want to answer. The rest of you can do it too if you want...

Let's go there.

What is a friend to you?

More phrases!!! There is another phrase or proverb that says... "who find a friend find a treasure", there is even an Italian film from 1981 (with actors Bud Spencer and Terence Hill) of that name. Funny.

Filmaffinity.com

Image source: Filmaffinity España

And it may be true, having a friend, even though it may seem like it, is not easy. We can meet a lot of people but friendship implies a deeper bond, giving up that initial facade to let us really know each other, knowing things that others don't know, and helping us when we need it most. They say it's in bad times when we find out who our friends really are.

Do you have a best friend?

I think not, and I think that in reality I have never had it because otherwise it should continue to be. Now I don't have it, but I think that what best friend means, the first person you turn to or think of, even in some cases with more relationship and affinity than with relatives, I have not really experienced it with the intensity and the time that I would have liked.

Yes, at some point in my youth I thought I had that, a best friend, even more than one in different moments depending on the time, but my question is, should best friends always be?

Also now in these times, we have a new virtual world in which to find friends, although it is not the same. I don't think they can be the best of friends, but virtual friends can give us a lot, and in some way share ideas, thoughts and comments, share our days and worries or they can be happy when they see the photos of a trip. That is also friendship.

Do you think having many similarities is necessary to become friends?

It depends on what we mean by similarities, I do think there must be something in common, but it doesn't have to be physical, mental or even political. It is possible to have friends who think differently if we are empathetic, respectful and intelligent enough to hold interesting discussions with deep arguments that in the end enrich us all. Perhaps this is becoming increasingly difficult because I also believe that there are impossible points, on which a true, sincere and lasting friendship cannot be based.

There has to be something, a connection and affinity that brings us closer instead of pulling us away.

Have you ended a friendship with someone?

Over time people move away, follow different paths, their lives and ours are occupied in a different way. It is a way to end friendship, passively or tacitly. When neither party is really interested, nothing needs to be said, each one will go their own way without longing for anything, and that says it all. That has happened to me, in one sense and another. Unfortunately with a lot of people.

Also sometimes in a more direct way, when you feel that it was not like before, that you feel that they are taking advantage of you or that they throw things in your face that a friend would not do, that you have changed, or that at the moment you need it you do not is by your side

But sometimes this is necessary, we have to push away people that we discovered one day to be toxic, who in the end did not give us anything of what it should be, I always say that a lot of falsehood must be cleaned up, because there is a lot of it.

And I add, there is no need to fear loneliness, because we are never alone, we are our best friend or at least we should be. And if you are not, ask yourself why.

Have you lost a best friend?

No, I have not lost a best friend, in the physical sense. I know it must be very painful because, after all, it is part of your family, a very important part of your life.

I have lost friends in other ways, without realizing it. I thought I had friends, but I realized that they were there for parties and trips, or to tell me things or to ask me other things... but when all that good time ends, where were they? They have moved on with their lives and you have been left behind, with no one to turn around and look.

Do women or men make better friends?

I want to believe so. I have had male and female friends, and it is possible, but there must be the same or more sincerity in these cases, everything must be clear because there can be also some misunderstanding and it is hard to manage it... but why not? To deny this would be to affirm that we cannot be friends with a large other part of the population, it would be sad. It may even be that in some cases it is even easier, if there is an affinity in the way of being or thinking, if there is that connection as human beings.

Do you believe in soulmate friends?

I imagine it must be the same as in love, in the end there are different types of connections at a deeper level, and there are friendships that have almost become brothers, as if they had always been together. I believe that beyond what we think, what we think or how we behave, there are things that truly unite us, those invisible threads that go from soul to soul, and friendship is another form of love, just like family love. Those divine threads can exist if we want to say so, in the end we are part of something bigger and somehow we can go fitting some piece, in our existence. Could it be some kind of miracle in our lives?

Final Thoughts

I'm not sure I have any final thoughts, well actually, yes, I could add a lot, I guess from what we've been through and what these experiences and friendships have taught us. Because any friend we have had, good or bad, in the past or even in the present, all of them in some way or another have given us something, a lesson and an experience that is part of us and in our lives. So to all those who have passed through my life I thank you.

Unsplash.com (by Taylor Smith)

Image source: Unsplash.com (by Taylor Smith)

Thanks so much for reading! Have a nice and encouraging day!

And really thanks to my sponsors!♥

November 18, 2022

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The text is totally mine, by Duvinca

The image is a screenshots from filmaffinity.com

and the lead image is from Unsplash.com


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Comments

Sometimes I feel that no one is my real friend except my childhood friend with whom I am still very close despite the years that are behind us. There are many other friends, but I don't feel a sincere connection and everything comes down to benefit and interest, unfortunately.

$ 0.01
2 months ago

I agree, at least you still have some connection with childhood friends, not always possible... but people talk very easily about friend when in fact it's very hard to really meet real ones. I have learned well, when your life is good many people come and when you are in trouble people go far away...

$ 0.00
2 months ago

Best friend I don’t think has to be that forever. There are best friends for various stages in our lives and some of them might be for life, but in my case I don’t have friends like this. I have one friend that I know since pretty much I was born, as our parents were friends too, but I’d not call her a best friend then or now. Just a friend, which is valuable nonetheless. I have a best friend now, but will she be forever? Who knows. In either case I value her for the role she plays in my life now, just like any other ‘best friends’ I had in the past 💙

$ 0.01
2 months ago

Yes different stages, different ourselves too so it can be normal, people change so friendship values maybe too. But all people who are/were in our lives it is always for a reason, maybe for some life lesson or who knows... so we should appreciate that. Thanks always a very rich and interesting point of view, my friend!

$ 0.01
2 months ago

I am very happy that you value my comments sis. We have a saying about people in our lives… they come for a reason, for a season or a lifetime. I think it’s very true 💙

$ 0.01
2 months ago

You have answered those questions of Bob very beautifully. I really love those, and got some interstate answers, even helped in increasing my knowledge.

Answer regarding Soulmate Friends is very heart touching answer.

$ 0.01
2 months ago

Thanks dear, it's nice if you liked the answers, I just wrote according to my memories, experiences and listen to my heart and what it was telling, that's all.

$ 0.00
2 months ago

Yes but those were interesting and wonderful answers ☺️

$ 0.01
2 months ago

Well answered Duvinca. Yes I can certainly agree having friends that we have a family kind of love for like a brother or sister.

$ 0.03
2 months ago

Yes that can be, sometimes family members are good and we have a lot in common some other times not really... but not easy always to find those other friends. If you do it you are lucky.

$ 0.03
2 months ago

Ya once in awhile you can feel a good friendship.

$ 0.01
2 months ago

If ending friendship is defined as drifting away from 'used to be' friends, then I've ended a lot.

I don't quarrel, I just drift away when I see that the bond is no longer there

$ 0.01
2 months ago

Sometimes it's better like this, natural... but some few time maybe some words remain untold...

$ 0.00
2 months ago

Yes my friend that's true. We had a different paths that's why people never stayed us because they had their own lives too.

$ 0.01
2 months ago

Yes it can happen and we can understand it but sometimes it's just a lack of real interest to keep being there...

$ 0.00
2 months ago

Yes that's true my friend. It's part in our lives. It's normal.

$ 0.00
2 months ago

I thank you either for being a dear friend here

$ 0.01
2 months ago

Thanks a lot for your kind words, my pleasure to be here, very happy dear.

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2 months ago