We all make mistakes, sometimes not once, twice but many times because just like in the case of learning, we assimilate in different rates.Some people learn from their first mistakes while others repeat the same mistake twice or more before learning from it, some never learn from their mistakes at all. We learn from mistakes in different ways like taking time to reflect but most times, we need someone else to point it out to us because we're flawed, other times we correct others when we see their mistake because just like us, they too are flawed just like us and that's been human.

Today I wish to talk about correcting mistakes and criticism.

Criticism is generally of two types : constructive and destructive. Whenever we're in the position of addressing someone who's made a mistake or whose flaw in character need to be addressed whether for their own good, for the good of both of you or for the good of society at large, it is very important to not only bear in mind the issue, but also be mindful of the way we present the issue to the person we want to address. When the approach is wrong, the correction means very little and instead of solving a mistake, you end up creating a maybe even bigger one. In this regard, constructive criticism is employed to not only create an environment where the person you wish to criticise will listen to you wholeheartedly, but also increase the chances of them changing for the better.

Below are some tips on how to criticise constructively:

Reason for criticism :

Ask yourself if the criticism is that even necessary. Do you have a good reason to give such criticism? We make tiny slips everyday and we do realise it, we don't usually need someone to tell us what it is we need to do because it was only a mistake. We have the ability to correct ourselves in most things without anyone even telling us to do so. An example of a good reason to criticise is when the subject keeps repeating the same thing over and over again and it seems they don't know what they are doing anymore, and when such actions can be detrimental to them or those around them, then you have every reason to step in.

Start of with a complement :

If it is a person whom you are close to, there's definitely something you like about them because even the worst people aren't bad all in all. Before venturing into calling them out for what they have did or didn't do, you can start by genuinely praising them for the praiseworthy things they have done, especially if it relates to the situation you're about to address, this can make them feel relaxed and more open to whatever it is you want to say. Everyone loves being praised and complemented, just that some of us are modest or don't show it. Do not try to force positivity if there's nothing positive about the situation (it gets like that sometimes) because it might sound not genuine.

Talk to them in private :

In our attempts to correct a mistake we end up making an even more hilarious mistake so, who are we to criticise after that? One of the fastest ways to ruin possibility of them ever listening, even if you're speaking raw truths is to criticise them in front of people especially when it is done destructively. It is like an attack on their self-esteem which can force them to retaliate in defense then you start thinking that "gosh! They're so full of themselves" when you're the one who messed things up from the beginning. Set a time with them, sit and talk with them alone, they're more receptive this way.

Tone:

Instead of adopting the "big-brother" or a condescending tone, use soft speech. We should make our tone as sweet and nice as possible. Don't even make it sound like you're advising them, use a conversation but serious tone and you can even spice it up with some humor. The point is to get your point across. People love being treated nicely and will be grateful to you when you do, even if it has to do with criticism.

By making it sound like a conversation, I mean it should be two-sided. Sometimes the person critiquing can be wrong due to a lack of proper information or perspective in the matter. Give them a chance to say whatever it is they wanna say, this way you make compromises and maximise you chance of getting positive feedbacks. In conversing, where you think they went wrong you can suggest a better approach of addressing the matter, this would make it sound like they're are the one who consulted you for advice rather than the other way round.

That's all for now and I hope we enjoyed it!

Thanks for reading.

❤❤