"Womb- watchers"

Due to cultural inclinations, most people in my continents especially the elderly and middle aged are of the belief that marriage is largely because of the purpose of parentage rather than of love and affection. Having children that would inherit you and represent you on earth when you're no more is considered as the most important achievement in a typical african marriage.

Thank you 🙏

Alot of folks expects that as soon as a couple are pronounced man and wife, then children should better start coming out of the union, at most two years after the wedding. If this does not happen, they'd definitely be regarded with jaundiced eyes by virtually every one around them, and a whispering campaign could keep covering grounds as time goes.

But the times have really changed you know. In this twenty first century, a young couple, might decide to take time to strategize and workout the future of their marriage first before they start bringing children to the world.

No doubt, childbirth brings happiness and contentment and every woman would love to have at least an experience. Sometimes it might not come as quickly as expected to some couples even if they had been trying to make it happen for a while.

This might lead their marriage to be under serious strain by outsiders who never cease talking about them

" The next time I come visiting, I would really loved to be greeted by the screams of "Grandma! grandma! " from my little grandchildren". An impatient and worried mother would say to her son and daughter-in-law, either jokingly or with a stern face before storming out of the house.

Sometimes her visits to the young couples might turn unexpected and she'd explain to them that she was on her way back from a nearby destination then she decided to stop by at their house to say hi. Ofcourse, this might not be true, her reason for might just be to observe if the young woman have started developing a protruding tummy. Heck, some mother-in-laws can tell when a woman is pregnant, even if it's just a day old just by physically observing her.

This constant bother might cause a married young woman great discomfort as she'd be made to feel as if she was deliberately evading pregnancy. To make matters worse, she'd always imagine what is always been said about her childlessness whenever her husband and his mom are having a private discussion.

Other mother in-laws might exercise some level of patience by leaving the couples alone till it's exactly nine months after the wedding. Then they would suddenly come out of the blue and start screaming at the couples about why she hadn't yet been invited for her grandchild's naming ceremony.

Some might even suspect that the reason why their daughter in-law hasn't yet conceive was probably because she had done series of abortions in the past which might have affected or cause such a delay in her ability to conceive. Even though several fertility tests and diagnosis have proven that there's absolutely nothing wrong with either of the two couples.

Most times, the husband might not seem as bothered as the wife since he might be very busy at the job. And ofcourse a man definitely doesn't display emotions as easily as a woman. He'd always be the one to calm his wife and also promises that everything would be alright. By the way, the attention of family members, friends, neighbors and "well wishers" are mostly being focused on the woman. Maybe because she's always at home and also the one who would carry children in her womb.

One day, a "concerned" mother-in-law might come along with a native medicine which she'd claim would facilitate quick pregnancy. Then she'd make sure that the young woman understands and adhere strictly to the instructions of it's usage .

Few months into the marriage , some close friends of the lady might ask her every now and then in a playful, or serious manner ( even though they are aware it would hurt) about the reason why she hadn't got pregnant yet. Such kind nof questions are mostly ask by friends who are still single. Because I don't think a fellow married woman would be so insensitive since she also knows and understand how these things are.

I know of a young woman, who after getting married took only seven months before she could get pregnant but the constant subtle and direct babbles from outsiders made it seem as if she had been married for many years without an issue.

That's how our people are. They have this inherent albeit repulsive attitude of poke nosing into others affair. When a girl of marriageable age is still unmarried, they keep wondering and even asking " why are you not married yet when your mates are already in their husband's house". And when she eventually gets a man, they'd never stop asking why she's yet to have child even when the marriage is barely two year. Even when she and her husband decides to wait a little longer after the first birth, people would still ask if something had suddenly gone wrong in their reproductive ability . Urghhh!!

Sometimes, I can't help but wonder the emotional trauma that couples who had been married for a long time without children pass through in the hands of such malicious people.

Ultimately, children would definitely come when they would come. " God makes everything beautiful at the right time". It mostly end in joy and gratitude.

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Thank you for staying with.me ♥️♥️♥️