Let's Cast The Fears Away

Blog #30

October 8, 2021

Hello, what's up? It's Friday already!!! Looking at the number of blogs that I write, this will be the 30th. Wow, I can't believe that I was able to publish many articles already. Seems like I just joined yesterday. Anyways, since I am already a month old user, I am starting to give a little to the community by sponsoring others. It's just a small amount because that is what my wallet can afford this time.

I was sitting in my bed, watching the four corners of my room. This is the only place that I am comfortable with and the only place which knows what I have been through in life. I am getting used to this kind of life. If you'd asked me if I have some friends, I will say yes. I have my pillow who used to be my crying shoulder, a blaNket that will keep me covered when I sleep, and my bed which makes my sleep comfortable.

I just get out to buy some things that I need but after that, I just stayed here all day without any worries. When I go out, I made sure to wear my blue hooded jacket and my head lowers down whenever I meet other people outside. I also made sure to buy all the things I want for a week or two so I won't go out always. For me, it is a hassle if I go out every day, I am not used to seeing many people. Whenever I see someone staring at me, I feel like I am melting slowly and that makes me want to run and lock myself inside the room. Don't blame me for behaving like this, this is the life that I am used to. This is the life I lived for many years. I am afraid to face people, I am not confident to interact with them. I am driven by this fear inside me. If I am inside my room, it keeps me sane but when I get out, I am getting paranoid. I am thinking a lot of things.

But the time comes that I need to come out of this four-cornered room. I need to work for a living. My family will not stay forever with me, time comes that they will leave me so I need to secure my future. But can I survive the life outside? I am not used to it. Right now I am already having so many what-ifs.

What if I will fail in everything I do?

What if I can't find a job, what will happen to me?

What if I will just disappoint them?

What if? What if? What if?

Thinking of these what-ifs makes me insane. Should I take risks? What will happen to me once I came out of my comfort zone?

Who would have thought that I was once a shy person? I was somewhat like the person in the scenario given, not exactly what she did but the one which is afraid to face other people. The one who is not comfortable when someone stared at me.

Why I became like that? Maybe because of the environment which I grow up in. I only have my grandma, uncles, aunts, and siblings with me. Then our neighbors are too far from us. We live in the province. Every day is silent and peaceful.

I remember when I was in elementary, I am a student who is just silent inside the classroom. Whenever we have participation, I am always hesitant or I am too afraid to voice out my opinions. I am afraid that they will laugh at me when I commit mistakes. Even when I was in high school I was like that too. That's who I am before.

But as I age, my mind gets matured. I realize that I can't survive in this world if I am afraid of taking risks. Life itself is a risk already! Making decisions, choosing which path to take, and taking chances in every opportunity is a risk already.

If I don't take a risk, I will not know what I am capable of.

If I don't take the risk, I won't learn something.

If I don't take risks, I won't reach the dream that I want.

If don't take the risk, I won't be living the life that I want today.

If we let those what-ifs and fears stay in our life, then we will not be living happily today. Our only limitations are ourselves, if we let fear and our negative thoughts control us, then nothing will happen with our lives.

Don't let fears grow inside our minds and heart, it will just destroy our life. It will kill our dreams and it will kill our confidence.

Fears can't give something good to us, so let's face and overcome it. If you're like me who don't have much confidence within myself then let's together build back our confidence.

Let us cast the fears away from our lives!!!

That's all for today! Thanks for reading!

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