"I tried so hard...in the end, it doesn't even matter"
'90s kids would know where the title came from.
Music is the escape for most of us, if not all.
You will come to a point in your life where you are with the world or against it. There is no in between. Mostly, that is during your teenage years. You are old enough but not enough to do what you want to do. You feel restricted and confined.
You want to challenge everything and everyone. I know you can all relate. Maybe some of you have come to that point sooner or later.
With so much angst, anger and lots of emotions that you can't express, you find ways to release those.
For me, it was through music.
Back then, radio is still the thing. There was internet but boy, oh boy, how pricey they were. It was dial up then, not fiber, not as quick and fast as they are now. It was more or less PHP60.00 per hour back then (around USD1.50). As a student, that is really expensive. There were no smartphones although we do have ipods and other players back then. Cassette tapes are still a thing too. CDs are pricey.
Because we couldn't acquire music as easily as now with just a click of a button, we get to enjoy music more.
That's when I came across Linkin Park. I first heard them on the radio. They were new. They were fresh. They are a combination of everything which was refreshing. I instantly fell in love with their music. The voice of one of the lead vocals, Chester, was easy to listen to and his range is incredible!
Plus, the lyrics of their songs echo the emotions I am bottling inside me.
I bought song hits (those magazines with lyrics and chords of the latest hits and some info about some artists) just to get to learn more about their songs.
I did collect some of their albums in cassette tapes and played those over and over again. I find comfort in a way knowing that I was not the only one feeling what I felt then. Someone understands. Someone relates to me. I am not alone.
So in a sense, Linkin Park became a part of my life. It helped me out of my darkest episodes.
It was a big blow when Chester took his like in 2017. It felt like a part of me died with him.
I playing some songs in YouTube the other day when when this video was played. This is a tribute to Chester. Artists from different bands came to sing Linkin Park songs.
While it was a nice tribute, you get to appreciate more the voice of Chester for only he can give justice to the songs of LP. I'm not saying the artists who sang in his place where that bad but it was cringey at times. There were still some good ones.
What hit me the most was the crowd singing along. That created such an impact. I wish I was there singing along with them.
When I have learned about Chester's death, there was a whole new meaning to all the songs and they way he sang them. It's like a personal cry for help from him.
We really don't know how others suffer and struggle. Please check on your loved ones and friends. Be kind to others all the time. Be more understanding and be more patient. Empathize with them. Mental health is as important as physical health.
Also, don't be afraid to reach out and talk to others. Hey, you can talk to me, too. Just buy me unlimited coffee :D