Unconscious

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From one moment to the next the spirit left me.
The good one, together with the good vibes. It's the moment I ask myself how to go on. Is this what I want for me? Hanging around, wasting my time by doing what I don't like. Who do I benefit if it isn't me if it is no longer me who feels enthusiastic about the things I do? I quit jobs because of the same feeling, the feeling of losing myself. It's clear, it should be clear I can't always do what I like. Not because of a lack of time or the responsibilities I have but because of my lack of everything. Energy to start with. I wish I could recharge myself as easily as the old cell phone but I can't. Even after a night rest, I am not charged for 15%. I guess my battery is nearly dead and there's nothing for sale I can replace it with.
I gave up on cooking weeks ago to save energy and while the clock ticks I continue posting stuff (cps) for the children to leave a bit behind of me. The person they might easily forget together with all the other memories I tried to create during the past years we had.
While laying on my bed I hear them laughing out loud, the joy scatters around. It's not with me but what counts is they are happy.



Device: mobile phone
Egg timer: set at 10 minutes
Prompts: written in bold


#kittywu #selfmotivation #freewriting

13
$ 0.18
$ 0.18 from @TheRandomRewarder

Comments

Nice job

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4 years ago

I've been in this situation for years. Only to find out that I am not the only person who feel this inside our workplace. I discovered a lot of people who's also struggling emotionally but the good thing is we help one another to cope up with this feeling.

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4 years ago

I think it happens to many more. The main problem is we continue, continue because it is asked from us, we are forced to. We do it without a break till the moment we discover it's no longer possible.

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4 years ago

I know how it feels. No matter how hard to tried to escape, there is always a time where it needs to be felt like we're obligated to.

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4 years ago

I can see that you know what you want

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4 years ago

It's more that I decided to give in to things I can no longer do or control. It feels good if people, my children, can still laugh no matter what. πŸ’•

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4 years ago

Okay

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4 years ago

I am back my dear frnd❀

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4 years ago

It is good to see you back. I could ask where you have been but I assume if you want to share that you would have. Welcome back dear. πŸ’•πŸ€

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4 years ago

Hmmm so much about you.

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4 years ago

I hope the drive to do things will always be with youπŸ€—

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4 years ago

My brains still work but the neck damage causing me being unconscious will not heal. The drive is back if my conscious is back. πŸ’•

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4 years ago

Then i pray for your conscious to be back!❀

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4 years ago

Make your children an inspiration to be charge 100%. Family is the drive, the reason we are, and why we strive to have a better life.

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4 years ago

Thanks for the tip but that won't work. The unconscious is unconscious. If I hit you with a big hammer on your head or your neck you are knocked down and no family will recharge you. If it only was that easy. πŸ’•

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4 years ago

Invest in your children, they are your family now, bonding with them, being close with them is your charger when being knocked down.

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4 years ago

Even if my family can recharge me the other things around me will take away the charges, so I do not think that I will ne able to be a 100% charge.

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4 years ago

This is what I felt now. If I have the option to quit my job, I have done to few.years back. I do feel like I am losing to myself, forcing myself to work things that do not give me enjoyment in doing so.

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4 years ago

It sucks when we feel like this. There are days when nothing helps and you just feel like a worm, slithering in bed. Nothing appetizes you and nothing moves you. The only thing we can do is let that feeling pass, but it may not.

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4 years ago