I am not a Christian.
I do not believe in what is preached and my doubts about religion started during my childhood. To some the stories in the Bible make sense to me they don't. I do not see God as a person who is honest, fair, and full of love. All those tales full of life lessons, it beats me. I can not find the so-called message. I hear and see something different. Something they do not want me to see, they try to talk out of my head because according to them I should see it differently which I can not. I do understand why some do but I see different words, read a different story. This story should be told and known too.
People easily believed 10,000 years ago what was told, so they did 000 years ago. If you are not that educated everything is a miracle or wrath of... I am not one of them and I have doubts I would have been 2000 years ago. People like me questioning everything always exist. They are I liked, a threat to the community but also the bringers of new insights, new ideas, and inventions that the whole society benefits from.
I am raised with the bible, by praying seven times a day, "respect your parents" and all kind of phrases which fit the teachers, the believers, and my parents. Rules they didn't live by themselves but were willing to teach by beating you to death. Is this what God stands for? The love, the goodness? I find it hard to believe and to be honest, I don't believe it. This is the reason why I left the community and unsubscribed to the group (church) as they showed up on my doorstep and dared to ask for ten percent of my income. Goodbye church I am not the cow you can milk. You have never been there for me, you never cared, you just collect. You should have known Jesus didn't like moneymakers, those sitting in front of the temple, and neither do I.
I decided to raise my children with an open mind.
They know what a Bible and Quran are. They know what God stands for and what people say or claim. They know stories because they went to Christian schools. Catholic and Reformed ones and even been at a school for mainly Muslims. To me believing is a component of human development just like history, reading, writing and so many more things which help increase knowledge and is a way to build confidence. Knowledge is power. The more you know and see the more opportunity to make an objective choice. A choice we all have to make if it comes to our own happiness. Living in fear is not the way to achieve it.
My children should be free to choose for themselves.
Choices can only be made if you know what the choice contains. God didn't bring me anything, he wasn't the one who improved moy life. If he exists he is the person who agreed with a little child starving for hunger, being molested, abused. There's not one single part of this story I am grateful for. I can't thank him for it, for my life, if I would it means I am a hypocrite.
The culture I was raised in is a sober one. We do and say things straight, we do not waste words on being polite, make things better than they are. Already in the '60s, many gave up on religion. The threat to end up in heaven if we... is not one that impresses us and that's why our churches are empty. The preacher is too old fashioned to reach out to people living in a modern time, to those who have an opinion of their own. We are not blind and saw no door is opened if we knock and the religious ones are not the ones who give to the ones in need. We learned you can only achieve by working hard and by doing what feels right.
If self-esteem is low, if you suffer from anxiety, if no one gives you a hand and life is filled with misery it's good to cling on to someone, something, something that might give enough hope to go on.
I learned I am capable of taking care of myself.
I do not need to pray and beg God to help me and I do not thank for what I or others did for me.
As a child, I had to thank God for the food which made me seriously ill. I did although it didn't make sense. These days I thank the person who gave it to me, the one who cares deserves the credit. My children do the same. They are polite, say "thank you very much" and show gratefulness and respect.
These are two things I value but do not see much back if it comes to those who say they truly believe. I am surrounded by liars, killers, scammers, thieves, rapists... I am not judging but I do wonder how you can call yourself a believer if these are the values you live by. I know I can not live under someone's thumb, live by all those rules which means I am not a believer, not a Christian. I do not see it as something wrong, it's good to know oneself.
All those experiences, thoughts, about religion, are subjects open for discussion with my children. I do not tell them what to believe. I do not force it upon their throats, I am not teaching them a lesson by molesting them, setting them at the fire, or drag them behind my car. I do not let anyone abuse my daughters, do not prostitute them for the villagers, the family, or use them as a baby factory to support the whole family. I do not look down upon them or others because of gender, age, culture, sexual preferences, or belief. I might wonder and question it but that is it.
Within my family we are equal.
I am a single mom and we need to operate as a team to make it work. We all have our freedom of speech, of opinion. We all have our responsibility and rights as well. One doesn't go without the other, it goes hand in hand. I will not rule my children's life. It's up to them how to live, what to believe, how they step into the world, and what they add to it to make it a better and more peaceful one. A more peaceful one for them in the first place.
If you like to share your experiences as a parent you can submit to the community Parenting
Articles welcome about your life as a Cristian you can submit to the community
or Share Some Thoughts (SST) - Values
It's a splendid idea to not give pressure to the child. They should be free of selecting their own ways and if parents raise them with good values they will surely choose the right path on their own.