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New Plan to Start a New Life.

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Avatar for nheng1118
Written by   167
10 months ago

Friday. March 4, 2022

When I was accepted into the Pegaxy Scholarship of Chad’s P3 Racing, I had already decided what I would do with the money I would save on my scholarships. I have already decided to go back to my home town, to start a new life there. Yeah, I wanna go home with my kids, because I'm not sure if my hubby will come with us but for me, it's up to him if he comes with us or he will stay here with his family. I just can't take the stress here in Manila anymore. Honestly, I wanted him to come to us too though because I'm still hoping that he might change when we live in the province. Maybe there, his vices will disappear or be reduced somehow. I just feel like as long as he's here in this place, he can't really avoid his vices like drinking alcohol and gambling. I told him already, that whether he will come with us or not when we returned to Baguio, we would still leave this place as soon as possible. Because I'm so tired and I can't take it anymore, because of his vices we are suffering even more and drowning in debt already. Instead of spending my earnings to buy food or essential needs, we would have had no choice budget everything just to pay off his debts. Debts that I even didn't know about because he just spending it secretly on gambling.

https://exchange.prx.org/series/33546-heartbreak-stories-the-other-side-of-valentines-d

In fact, last Valentine's that we were supposed to be celebrating, he just gave me a surprise gift of resentment. He did something silly again on the 1st week of February. He spent his cousin's border's payment on his boarding house. His cousin entrusted him the payment of his borders for the rent and all he need to do is just sent it through Gcash, because his cousin is also in the province right now. So yeah, he spent the money again instead of sending it to his cousin. He gambled the money again which is worth 3k PHP ($60). It hurts right? Another problem while he knows that until now I'm still paying for that 60kphp ($1.1k) money of my Facemask buyer last year, which he also used to gamble. I still have less than 30k PHP ($580) balance to them that I'm still paying until now. Then he caused another new headache again. So imagine how I spent my Valentine.

Just to help him pay his cousin I even accept that job as a helper to him on his courier job in Shopee. But what sad is that when we received our salary for 6days of driving, his boss took all his debt already and all left from 7kphp salary is 800plus PHP. I almost cried when I saw our payslip imagine they less away our 300php everyday allowance including all his debt which is 3k plus also. Debts that I didn't even know what he did again. That's what his gift for me on Valentine's Day, headache, sadness, and pain.

This is the message I received from his cousin, that even with me he seemed angry because I did not fulfill the date I asked him to pay for the money my husband spent. I did beg and promised to pay that money but I didn't make it on time. Honestly, it hurts me to receive such a message, because I did nothing but to work hard and make a way for us to survive. Then he still has the guts to make such things, without even thinking about all my sacrifices. It hurts me to hear such words. But I could do nothing but accept it because it was really my husband's fault. And I have no choice but to find a way to pay him as well. As of now, I have already paid the bills of the apartment and land tax that his cousin wants me to pay. I have 1kphp plus that I still need to pay him

With so much chaos and stress in my brain from what he did, I decided that we should just go home to the province in case our lives change and maybe he will change if he comes with us. My brain is really tired of all the problems here in Manila that seem to have no end. I am also tired of everything my husband does, I am tired of understanding and forgiving him for all his vices. That's why I asked my aunt in Baguio, my aunt who raised me if we could go home there. She said if it's only me and my kids we can stay in our house (Grandma's house) but if my husband is going with us too we need to find a place to rent because I have my own family already. Since I still wanted him to go with us so that he might change there, I decided and asked my aunt a favor to just find a place for us to rent temporarily, since my aunt also said that I could build even a small house next to our house there once I can manage to earn already.

After a few days, my aunt messaged me and told me that our new place is ready. My uncle (her husband) talked to one of his friends to reserve one room for us in their apartment. Since it was my first salary too in Chad's P3 Racing Guild, I just decided to use it to pay the rent. Good thing the rent is just 1k PHP ($20) it is already a cheap price to rent there so I sent 2kphp ($40) for my one-month deposit and one month advance to my aunt. It's ok with me even if we only live in a small room since my eldest daughter can live in our house, my aunt said, it's just close to us. Maybe I'll just be a little patient until I save up for building a small house there. It's better to suffer in a small house than to stay in this place, where I get nothing but problems and troubles.

Hopefully our lives there will change forever. I hope that little by little I will fulfill all my dreams there. I know that my family will not leave me there, since my Mom is no longer here, that I can run here in Manila, I can only run to my family on my Dad's side in Baguio. I know how much my Aunt loves me plus my Grandma is also there so I know that somehow someone will guide me there. Someone will help me in the new life I want to fulfill. I really want to live quietly and away from trouble.

I have already packed our things. Tomorrow I will just take my children to my stepdad's house to say goodbye to him. Then on Monday, we will travel home to Baguio. I am also excited somehow because I will finally be away from the chaotic world of Manila. I just hope that my husband will learn there and change his life forever. I know it's hard to change someone, especially in what they are used to doing but I still hope that I can really change him for the better. Even though he is like that, I still love him and I also don't want to have a broken family.

May God help me with my plans. And thanks also to my Chad's P3 Racing Guild Scholarship for making a way for me to start a new life there in my hometown.

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Written by   167
10 months ago
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Comments

Grabe sis parent same situation natin luckily nandito kami sa mga biyenan ko kung nangingupahan pa kami,baka ano na anguari samin. Ang laki din ng utang ng asawa ko till now inaayos pa niya ng sahod niya kaya hind kami mmakalitaw litaw sa peiblema. Utang na hibdi ko din alam kung saan dinala at apano nagsatos ng ganun. Mayabang kasi eh kakasita walang bisyo ang asawa ko except sa gadget. Peeo dahil nga ayoko din ng broken family inintindi ko nalang.

Sana magabago na mga mister natin. Maging mga responsable na sana sa susunod na mga plan at agagwin nila.

$ 0.00
10 months ago

I'm sorry to hear this sis, that you've gone through a lot last month that you are supposed to be happy. Pero good thing you decided finally to move out and get to the province. Hopefully there you'll get the rest you needed and the peace you deserve. 💗 Laban lang sis.

$ 0.02
10 months ago

..thank you so much sis..yes laban lang ng laban..Tayo pa bang mga girls eh papatalo sa GANITONG pagsubok hehe..💪💪💪

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10 months ago

Yes. Girls power. Lahat kaya natin, wag lang tayo susuko. 💗

$ 0.00
10 months ago

agoi.akala ko ako lang nangungunsumi sa asawa.Pero yung asawa ko eh natigil na yung bisyo niyang pag iinom at yun pagsasabong niya eh natigil na rin.Kasi sabi ko sa kanya na huwag niyang simulang maadik sa sabong kasi hirap talaga ang taong sugarol eh lakas mandaya kahit sa asawa at ayaw kong mag away kami dahil lang sa sabong.Buti naman at narealize din niya yung mali niya at tumigil sa kakasabong. Anyway,Laban lang sis.Lahat naman ng nangyayari eh may dahilan.Praying na sana tuluyan ng magbago ang asawa mo pag uwi inyo sa Baguio para na rin magkaroon na kayo ng tahimik na buhay.Wag mo lang sukuan ang asawa sis alam naman natin na lahat ngbabago. Dasal ko eh sana God will shower you more blessings para sa panibagong panimula sa buhay niyo.

$ 0.02
10 months ago

Aw buti ka pa sis, sana nga din matigil na ng Asawa ko yang sabang at online casino na yan..Ang hirap kasi Yung tipong Mahal mo lang talaga at alang alang sa mga anak mo kaya ka nagtitiis 🤧

$ 0.00
10 months ago

same lang tayo sis alang alang sa mga bata lahat kayang tiisin.God is with you sis kaya mo yan.Di ka naman bibigyan ni God trials na di mo kaya dahil alam niyang you are strong enough para malampasan ito.

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10 months ago

Thanks much sis 🙂

$ 0.00
10 months ago

you're welcome sis

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10 months ago

Relate me. Pero di sa asawa kasi waley pa ako 'nun, hehe. Pero kay Papa namin kasi ah basta, laki na ng pinagbago nya. Parang wala nang pakialam sa amin ba kasi hinahayaan na kami na kami na lang gumastos sa lahat. Di naman s'ya maluho or mabisyo pero iba ns ugali eh. Di na matanto madalas~ feeling ko nga malapit nang mapatid pasensya ni Mama eh. Pero wag naman sana, ayokong magka-broken family kahit malalaki na kami nila sibs.

Talagang sa relasyon, babae ang mas nagdadala eh. Kasi kung hindi? Karamihan siguro ng mga mag-asawa na may ganitong probs is hiwalayan agad ang gagawin.

$ 0.02
10 months ago

Baka si Daddy mo sis is sign of aging lang hehe..Asawa ko sana magbago pa talaga..nagpromise nanaman sya na magtino na hoping na this time matupad kaya mas better na ilayonkna sya Dito..Ang hirap talaga lahat ng sacrifices nasa babae..

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10 months ago

Baguio is a great place! Napakaganda doon ate and maaliwalas. Why naman ganon yung asawa mo ate? Bakit dimo nalang hiwalayan? Lagi nalang siyang ganyan kamo. Mas maganda nalang na iwan mo siya jan kung wala naman siyang magandang kinabukasan na maibibigay sa anak niyo. Baka sa huli, si baby mo din kawawa kasi may tatay siyang laging nagsusugal. 🤧

$ 0.02
10 months ago

Kung di ko lang Mahal bhe baka matagal na talaga na hiniwalayan ko sya 🤧 kaso ala eh umaasa pa din Ako na magbago sya 😔

$ 0.00
10 months ago

Naku, mas malaki talagang problema yan kapag naadik na sa sugal. Okay lang yung inom at sigarilyo eh, pero yung sugal nako. Isang taya lang, ubos isang buwan niyong budget. Sana naman magbago na siya diyan kapag umalis na kayo.

$ 0.02
10 months ago

Kaya nga Po, sobrang stress mg sugal na bisyo..panalunin ka konti ngayon taz bukas x10 na Ang babawiin Sayo Hanggang sa mabaon ka na sa utang. 😔

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10 months ago

I know marriage is supposed to be forever, but in my opinion that is an outdated belief. We need to do what’s best for us and our close ones. I wish you all the best in your new life sis. All will work out for the best eventually 💙

$ 0.02
10 months ago

Yeah marriage is supposed to be forever, forever headache 🤧🤧🤧 hahaha, hoping he would still change once we are already there in our province, still hoping he will focus on us someday and forget his vices 😔

$ 0.01
10 months ago

Hope dies the last they say ;)

$ 0.00
10 months ago

Ang dami mo palang pinagdadaanan sa buhay,sana ay magkaroon kayo ng magandang simula sa Baguio kasama ang pamilya.Hindi talaga natin kayan baguhin ang isang tao,kaya sana naisip nya mismo sa sarili nya na gawin king ano ang tama para sa mga anak nyo.

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10 months ago

..sana nga sis dumating din yung araw na marealize nya lahat ng pagkakamali nya at matuto syang magfocus sa family namin

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10 months ago

Don't lose hope sis,have faith,be strong for your kids,and I hope for your complete healing too ,dahil ikaw pa naman ay napakasipag maghanapbuhay.

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10 months ago

Ang bigat sa pakiramdam habang binabasa ko to sis. Ramdam ko ying bigat ng pasanin mo. Jusko naman yung asawa mo eh, bakit naman ganyan ginagawa sayo. Pasensya ka na to say this pero sana eh magbago nga yan asawa mo. Milagro yata ang kailangan nyan para magbago..

Good decision ginawa mo sis and good luck sa new life nyo..

$ 0.02
10 months ago

Isang malaking milagro talaga sis..sobrang bigat talaga sa dibdib, Yun bang lahat na pinapasok ko mag kaextra income lang taz ganito sinukli sa akin haizt..pero sana nga magbago pa sya..umaasa pa din Ako na magtino sya..Yung sugal lang Naman talaga Ang malaking prob ko sa kanya dahil nababaon na talaga kami dahil dun 🤧😔

$ 0.00
10 months ago

Naku isa yan sa bisyo ang magppahirap talaga sa mag asawa. Pray lang si na sana matauhan asawa mo. Baka pag nakita na nya na lumalaki mga anak mo eh mahiya na sya at magbago.

$ 0.00
10 months ago

kaya nga sis yan din sinasabi ko sa kanya na wag sana kako kalakihan ng anak nya yung gawain nya at wag na nyang antayin na anak nya mismo ang ikahiya dahil sa ganyang gawain nya :(

$ 0.00
10 months ago

Mahirap talaga sis basta involves gambling lalo na't adik na sa ganyan. Mabuti lang sana palagi mananalo ,ehhh hindi ehh most talobat minsan lang ang panalo basta ganyan.

$ 0.02
10 months ago

..true sis..Yung panalo mo pa mas Malaki pa kapalit pag nagkataon .na halos mabaon ka na talaga sa utang 🤧

$ 0.00
10 months ago

truth sis. Kaya nga before settling down sa partner ko inassure ko na wala siyang ganyang vices hehehe

$ 0.00
10 months ago

Sana all 🤧😔

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10 months ago

Haaaay! Okay sana na uminom n lang wag lang magsugal dahil walang katapusan yan hanggang sa magkautang utang na. Ingat kayo sis sa pag uwi, sana magbago n hubby mo kapag nandun n kayo.

$ 0.02
10 months ago

Kaya nga sis grabe ng sakit sa dibdib mga ginagawa nya Minsan.. 😭 ok Naman sana sya kaso pag nasamahan na ng spiritu ng alak pati spiritu ng sugal kontrolado na sya 🤦🤧 sana nga may oag asa pa magbago sya dun sa Amin 😔

$ 0.00
10 months ago

Isn't a scholarship meant for studying only?

I hope back home you will have a more peaceful life and learn from your mistakes. Don't let yourself be manipulated and scolded at!

Keep those nasty letters and let them remind you of how you put yourself and family in danger.

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10 months ago