September 4, 2021
All of us went through the stage we call pagiging maharot. In this phase of our life, we meet several people that make our heart beat and feel the stupidity of love. However, not all of our flirting journeys became successful. Some of them last only for weeks or months, or if lucky enough it lasts for years.
As a growing individual, I can’t stop my hormones from acting crazy. Even though it is not my intention to be attracted to same and opposite sex, it is impossible to halt the feeling. As a marupok and maharot individual, I will just go with the flow. It is part of human nature and who I am to disrupt the balance, charot.
During the community lockdown, I met several people online that made my heart temporarily flutter, and today as a tribute to those wasted sleep, efforts, and time, I am sharing some of my failed flirting stories.
First on the list is the Homophobic Batangueño boy.
It is true that if you’re really into one specific person, you will disregard all of his/her red flags.
I met this person because of a person I also met online. He recommended his acquaintance saying that this person is fun to talk with and surely we will get along. So, why not? I gave it a try. Go lang nang go at minsan lang mabuhay.
I searched his name on Facebook and upon checking his pictures, I instantly got a crush on him. He looks good to be honest.
I am the one who messaged first and then it took me a while to receive a response from him. To be honest, while writing this, I was amazed with my bravery that time. I can’t believe that I was able to do that since I am an introvert and shy boy.
Anyways, I received a reply from him asking who I am and if I know him personally. I just reasoned that his profile popped out in my friend suggestion list and he caught my attention. I think he still doubted me at that time but continued to talk to me anyways.
At first the whole conversation is awkward but as time goes by the small talks become longer and comfortable. Even though he often calls me names and insults me because of my sexuality, I never saw that as a red flag and just let him do that for months.
However, even he’s homophobic towards me, I tried to understand him because I believe behind that attitude, there’s an underlying reason about it. I confront him about that issue and I found out that he was sexually abused by a gay when he was a child.
We continued to talk for several months but our communication became stale as we were busy with our own personal and academic life. Our last talk was last Christmas and New Year’s eve where we greeted each other. At the same time, he also apologized for the things he has done.
So you might think that maybe what happened to us is not flirting. You might also think that maybe this is another case of friendship that was developed where everyone is bored and isolated in their home. But trust me, when I said that I felt that there was something, I mean it.
He always sends pictures(especially his selfies) , updates me, we always talk late and discuss and share things that happened during the day, and etcetera. Those things are a little bit weird to be identified as a friendly thing. I think he also felt something towards me however, since he identify himself as straight (heterosexual) I think he’s not yet ready to explore, charot. I respect that.
This person is the most remarkable fling I had. All of the ideal traits I want in a person, he possessed it; aware of social issues, smart, and having a big... 😉 heart.
Second on the list is this vet student.
Probably this person has the most matured mindset to all of the flings I had. We talked for weeks and everything seems to be working fine but then I realize that he doesn’t deserve me and I don’t deserve him.
During this time I am mentally unstable and he’s the only person who’s ready to listen to my vents and rants, and I don’t want to be that way. I feel that I am just using him for my own needs. This is why I discussed this matter to him and decided to halt what’s between us. I explained that I am not yet ready to enter into a relationship while I am in this state of mind. Gladly, he understood it and agreed with me.
There’s no hard feeling, to be honest. We are still talking up to this day, and I am happy with the current friendship we have :))
Final remarks...
I decided to end this for a while. I still want to add more but this article will be too long and you might get bored reading it, lol. Another thing is this is only an experimental topic and I don’t know if this will catch readers attention. I might continue this series if you like so hahahaha.
To all of my failed landians, I am glad that I met you. You taught me some valuables lessons in life and helped me to be stronger than ever. I wish you all the best and I manifest for our happiness and emotional stability.
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I'm here to tell you as an ate na medj malandi, keep thy feelings at bay unless he asks you to go exclusive UwU cuz you're gonna have a long list of disappointments if you don't learn how to play the internet dating game