No. 20

June 29,2022

I bumped into a post of a young lad here @Janleo my appreciation to you son for being brave, you need loads of it in the coming days . I was shocked at the same time amazed on how he introduced himself . He's 16 years old and already a father. What's the ideal age to be a father anyway? Heck ,i don't know if there's one. Too young to be a father huh? I guess he is. Based on what i have read. He is man and brave enough to face the consequences of what he did. At his age , not all young lad will do the same of acknowledging his fault and be man and strong willed enough to face the truth that he is now a father. Running away from his responsibility was not an option to him.

Some may actually vanish and hide into their mom's skirt or even deny that the baby is his. Or some will say " I am not yet ready to be a Father" and blame the girl for being pregnant or worse ask the girl to abort the baby. For not doing such act young lad , i salute you. You pass the first stage.

He is now in conflict with his mom which is truly understandable. So why am i writing this? I'm writing this in reply to his post coz i want to say more but it would be too long if i write it in the comment section,hahaha! So this one is for you my dear @Janleo.

Why am i triggered? It's because , i'm also a Mother of a 16 year old. But mine is a girl , though we are teaching our child little by little to be independent but still she's still our baby. That's how we see her still. Not a baby with her milk bottle of course but a baby in a sense that ... In a complicated world that we are living in , she's still a baby knowing little about the real world.

We are preparing her to face the outside world. Though pandemic hampers a child's social development nowadays. It plays a big factor for teens not to experience the outside and the real actual world. That actual world is totally different from what they are seeing in the virtual world of social media. Living a life outside their comfort zones are way complicated and requires a lot of patience , diligence ,hardwork etc etc.. That life is not always about what we feel alone , not always about ourselves but on how we are going to deal with different God's creation in the outside world.

My daughter is a nice and sweet girl ,We are not strict to her but of course we have house rules. She's aware that " As long as your living with us , we are feeding you and everything you need is coming from us ...you should follow the rules. When time comes that you finished your studies and your earning your own money and you can live on your own then we will lessen and change our rules."We will support you all the way, on whatever path you want to take as long as it'll be for your own good. Our constant reminder to her that is now printed in her mind and heart that she knows how to say it without a fuss. lol!

Going back , So what we parents have to do to handle such struggle in our life? How are we going to help our child to deal with problems like that at a young age. How are we going to correct the mistakes? I guess it's a call for awareness for us parents. So how are we going to deal with it just in case it happen to us?

More or less , i've heard you @Janleo at your post. Understanding his situation as a mother and probably as a friend na rin. But i want him too , to understand his mother , his mother's side and point of view in general.

As a Mother

As a mom of two. My eldest is 16 year old girl and the youngest , a boy turning 6 this July. Though mine is a 16 year old girl and yet in our heart she is still our baby. So i will definitely be broken , devastated and horrified if she'll get pregnant at her age. It will break me into pieces for sure coz i know how hard it is to conceive a baby for nine months, give birth and most of all.. to raise a child into this world.

I know it won't be easy at her age of 16 to face and understand life of being a mother. Her state of mind and emotional status are not yet ready to handle things a mother is normally facing. In our present time wherein we are facing difficulties due to high rise of basic commodities , cost of living and other important things for us to live ... how a parent would not worry if your child got pregnant or impregnated his girlfriend at an early age? Gee , i don't know but i would probably faint or get crazy.

But just in case ( crossing my fingers) it happen. Well , getting furious is a normal reaction. I will freak out and vent my anger for sure. But...as a Mother or as parents , i will help to find solution to the problem. I will help my child to learn something from his mistake. I will help him to be strong to face the circumstances of his acts.

I will talk to my child and try my best to help them to come up with the fairest set up for them. Marriage of course is out of the option coz they are minors. Tell them that it won't be easy for sure but reaching their goals in life should not stop just because they are having a baby. They should work double time for their baby.

A mistake should not be corrected by another mistake. Face the consequences of what they did. If possible , i will encourage my son to finish school for him to give a better life to his family in the future. I may be shattered as a mother but i will help my son to accept his new role as a father and husband.

May you find in your heart to give your mom some time to cried out her pain. To understand and to wait for her to accept the situation. Maybe right now she's asking herself " where did i go wrong as a mother?" .While waiting for that to happen , be STRONG , PRAY hard , and armed yourself to face your battle. This is just the beginning of your journey. Goodluck to you young lad. May the Almighty blesses and guide you along the way. May your mom's embrace to happen the soonest.

That's all for now. Thank you guys for reading.

To my sweet sponsors @Talecharm and @Micontingsabit salamuch always.

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