Thursday, 8th of July 2021
My friend Tina could be my mother if she really tried. Very young mother, as there is 15 years between the two of us. As I mentioned before, I am an old soul though, so having much older friends have always been a thing in my life.
Out of all places we could have met, we met on the dance floor! Me, on the floor, doing splits with another girl after the salsa party has just finished and Tina, laughing out loudly and expressing her gratitude for the best birthday ever with us crazy salsa folk. There is something about people who laugh really loud that always gets me. They laugh from the bottom of their heart, just like me I guess.
I saw her briefly at a few parties since then and a few months later I was looking for a roomie for a yearly salsa congress in London. Someone pointed out that Tina was also looking for a roomie, so that’s where our paths crossed again. I got in touch with her and we sorted out the booking, but we totally missed each other on agreeing how to get there!
Unbeknowlingly to me, she made travelling arrangements with our other friends and we haven’t exchanged phone numbers by then. She was trying to duck someone and when I called, she didn’t pick up, thinking it was the person she didn’t want to hear from. For once I was ready to get to the hotel early, as I wasn’t working that day and not being able to get in touch with Tina was driving me mad. I didn’t want to leave without her in case she didn’t make other arrangements.
It was early evening when I sent her an angry text after many unsuccessful phone calls. She replied immediately with explanations and saying she’s there already. I was fuming! I even considered not going, as my mood was completely spoiled, but I also promised to work for the organisers of the congress and I couldn’t not keep my promised, so I got in the car and drove on my own. Luckily there was no traffic and it was a smooth ride. Back then I didn’t realise the importance of Divine Time and I was still trying to make things go my way, not knowing that they always happen just at the right time.
Next part I didn’t remember clearly, but only recently, when Tina and I had a few glasses of wine in her hot tub one full moon evening she told me she remembers it vividly. I stormed into the room, threw my bag on the bed I preferred and said ‘I take this bed!’.
‘Who the hell does SHE think she is?’ Tina thought to herself, but politely moved herself to another bed. We proceeded to clear the air by exchanging our versions of what happened and afterwards we started getting ready for the party and drinking loads! I guess that’s another part which I instantly loved about Tina. There was no beating around the bush and no hurt feelings were left without discussing it. Over the course of these last 5 years since I’ve met her this has always been the case and I value this in any relationship.
I think it was 2am when we finally got to the party, after hours of chatting about our past relationships. Time was of no issue though, as parties at Mambo City 5 Star Congress last till 6 am and the biggest party animals make sure to stay till the end and go to breakfast together. This particular year I had breakfast with newly met guy and his friend. Patrick turned out to be my life partner for the coming 5 years! Tina has been witnessing our love sprouting and growing over these years and became inseparable part of it in many ways.
Tina is one of kind friend that we all need in our lives. She’s been through a lot, but this never closed her heart from loving and giving her best to everyone. Sometimes I get asked how is it possible that the two of us are friends. She is the craziest of all my friends and there is always some kind of drama going on. She can also be flaky with her timing and trying to arrange travels with her is one heck of a challenge! So what? I can be flaky too. These days I just add a specific amount of time on top of the scheduled time and sometimes I even manage to make her wait 😅
Why do I love Tina?
She’s one of the most loyal people I known in my life. Our friendship is not without challenges, but as mentioned above, there always comes a time when we sit down and talk it all through and even though circumstances tear as apart at times, we always come back together, like old lovers.
You can count on her when your house is on fire! Call her in the middle of the night and if you manage to wake her up after the busy day she had, she’ll open her door and let you sleep in her bed and will feed you in the morning too!
Fancy a crazy adventure in our out of town/country? She’s your girl. No party can ever be boring with Tina.
She has a heart of gold, which she tries to share between her 3 grown up children, probably 9 or 10 grandchildren, 2 cats, 3 dogs, foster child and many, many friends.
She is a kind of friend which will show up unexpectedly on your doorstep with a bunch of flowers and screaming they are for her suicidal friend loud enough that the whole neighbourhood can hear it. There have been really dark patches in my life even since I’ve met her, although most people have no idea, as I don’t share it with many. She will always make time in her busy life to make sure I am ok.
She has a jacuzzi in her garden! Nothing beats the night spent basking in the light of full moon on a summer night with a glass of wine and heaps of laughter.
I’m sure I am missing many more reasons here, but I try to make the article not overly long, so it doesn’t become a book. In fact I could write a book about Tina alone!
When pandemic hit us all last year Tina suddenly had more time due to lack of clients in her beauty salon. She took some of that time to ponder about her life and decided to become a foster parent. I was a bit concerned how she will manage with another person to care for, but if you have a friend like Tina in your life you will know that once they set their mind into doing something, nothing can stop them!
‘Tina, my love!’
Of course fostering brought more challenges into Tina’s life, but seeing Grace’s (name changed for security reasons) journey in the past few months it is definitely worth the struggle. When I met Grace for the first time she was very uneasy and she wouldn’t leave Tina’s side for a second. She would follow her even to the toilet and wait behind closed door for her to finish. Just a few more months later she's settled in, feels much more secure and starts to behave like a happy child.
One thing you can hear the most in Tina’s house these days is Grace shouting ‘Tina, my love!’. Trust me, she can do this all day long.
My fostering journey started thanks to Tina.
From the first day I met Grace, Tina insisted I should apply to the be a foster parent myself. Grace really likes spending time with me and if I don’t show up for a while, she asks ‘When is that Monika coming?’. It truly warms my heart and eventually I decided to take my first step (but this you know already from my previous articles). By now I have completed my application and had 3 meetings with lovely ladies from the fostering agency Tina referred me to. Within the next 1-2 weeks I will be matched with an assessor/social worker to embark on 4-6 months journey throughout my life. I am sure it will be emotional, but also very healing and I promise to update you on my journey as much as possible.
By now I am sure you realise that everyone needs a friend like Tina in their life. I for one could not imagine my life without her!
Until next time 💙
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Wow! What a treasure Tina is. I could use a friend like Tina. Yes, I have circle of friends but not as close as your friendship with Tina. And Grace, she is adorable. Hope your foster child will be one too and will call you "Monika, my love". 🧡🧡🧡