I kid you not

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3 years ago

21st July 2021 1645 Hello Readers, I am guessing most of you will be asleep now or pretty soon. I had a day away from writing yesterday, we all need a break every so often to recharge our batteries. But I was still reading and have been drawn into doing the latest wee challenge that I saw on the awesome article from @CoquiCoin which you can read here . It is share ten facts about you as a kid. Well I have tried to share a range of ten facts or things, so here we go then Readers, ten fun and quirk facts or things I did as a kid.

  • Didn't like strawberries.

Yes when I was a child I didn't like them. They are okay now, but I never go out of my way to buy them. Strawberries are very popular in the UK, and they grow well in Scotland. I remember as a child they had pick your own farms. Then mother would make jars and jars of jam. So I would get hauled off with a plastic ice carton and told to pick only the red strawberries, I soon discovered that they also had pick your own raspberries, so I would ask to pick the raspberries instead. Now this was heaven. I would be standing there, saying one for the tub, and two for my mouth, I was a wee rascal and ate loads and loads. To this day I still love raspberries, they are my favourite fruit. Give me raspberry jam anyday of the week.

  • Met the Queen.

It was our schools 150th Anniversary and I was in Primary 6 so would have been 10. Our class teacher Mr Benson, was the arts and crafts teacher. The queen was doing a tour of the school and was due to visit our classroom to see us all making model airplanes out of balsa wood. I was charging ahead as I do, and almost finished my plane, when I decided that I wanted to give the edges of my wings a smoother curve to them. Problem sorted I would quickly use my craft knife to slice off a wee bit of wood. We heard footsteps in the corridor and it was apparent that the Queen's entourage was approaching. Quickly I thought, so I got the knife and cut the wood, unfortunately I kept going and not only cut wood but sliced a chunk out of my thumb below the fingernail (I still have a little scar to this day). Being a quick thinker, I used my handkerchief to wrap my thumb. By this time Her Majesty was in our classroom going round and taking to some of my fellow classmates. I had my back to the wall and my left hand behind my back. Smiling she walked up to me, and asked if I had started painting as she noticed the red marks on the wood. Oh yes I replied Your Majesty as I bowed my head and shook her hand. I am sure she knew it was blood, she then said she was looking forward to hearing us sing later that night.

My teacher gave me a lecture when they left, as by now he had figured out what happened and sent me to the school Nurse.

Later that night we all went to the Usher Hall in Edinburgh (the big music venue like the Albert Hall in London) and sang in a big choir various classical songs for Her Majesty. They even made a record of it!

Mural of Her Majesty the Queen in Belfast I took in 2018
  • Unwrapped all my Father's Christmas presents.

The first born male on my father's side of the family is always called Edward, I am Edward the seventh. This can make for confusing times, especially when I was a very wee bairn (bairn is Scottish for child). One Christmas I must have been 4 or 5, I got up when everyone was asleep, and snuck downstairs and went to the Christmas tree.

I collected all the presents that had Edward on them, and started to rip the paper off. I can only imagine in all my excitement that I must have been loud. So I got caught with heaps of adult socks around me by my mother, who could only laugh as I complained people had given me far too big socks!

  • Was a magicians assistant.

For my eight Birthday Party, my parents hired a magician. After many card tricks and pulling rabbits out of his hat, he asked for me to be his assistant. Fair enough I am game for a laugh, even from a young age. He got me to sit down on a chair infront of him, and asked whether I would to have a super brain. Not really knowing what he meant I said yes. The next thing he had an electric drill and started it. The other kids looked shocked as he put it over my head and started drilling. I didn't feel anything but was worried he had drilled a hole in my head. He then got a bottle and said he was pouring the super fluid into my brain and could I feel or taste anything. I said yes I feel raspberry juice coming down from my head into my mouth.

A big round of applause from kids and adults alike. He showed me the bottle and it was raspberry juice. I have no idea what he did but I still touch where he drilled and seem to visualise things, he gave me a super brain haha.

  • Put makeup all over my face.

I remember one summer we went on a road trip and went to visit a cousin of my mother. She was in her early twenties I think. Anyways I went off wandering and snuck into her bedroom, and found a desk where she had all kinds of things, apparently it was her make up table. I had a merry old time, putting red and purple lipsticks all over my face, and using foundation with the little powder puff that you use. I went downstairs after I heard my name being called. Luckily she was okay and thought it was funny.

  • Crayons in grandpa's study

I was a wee bit mischievous as a child I think! My grandmother used to call me a lovable rascal. My mothers parents lived in Fife, which is where I live now, and we often would visit them in the school holidays. I remember one day in the summer it was raining and I was bored. I was not allowed into my grandfathers sudy, never knew why not until later, but one day I went in there, and found paper and crayons, I had fun drawing on the paper, then the paper ran out, and there was this lovely white wall that was so inviting. I drew a little village on it! Boy did I get in trouble. No dinner and sent to my room. Grandma save me from a beating though, even brought me a jam sandwich when nobody was looking!

https://pixabay.com/photos/crayons-heart-love-art-colors-623067/
  • Breaking the cross.

My families are Christian, however from different sides. My mothers family is very Protestant and my fathers family is very Roman Catholic. It did make me grow up wanting to be neither especially as the troubles in Northern Ireland where I lived until the age of 5 were all down to religion. However I digress, I never knew my fathers father, but I did know his two aunts, my great aunts, Mother Superior Veronica and Sister Dorothy, they both belonged to the Convent of the Sacred Heart order. Veronica I hardly ever saw as she was always in Rome or Ireland or someplace. She was the one who wrote religious books for children. Dorothy however was much more down to earth and was a biology and nature teacher, and where I got my love for nature from I think. When I was young we were allowed to visit Dorothy in the convent on special occasions for tea and scones. I used to sit on her knee and was fascinated by the big silver crucifix she wore round her neck that drooped over her habit. One day I must have been super strong but I pulled and it broke and fell over the floor. I got into so much trouble when I got home!

  • Throwing space hopper through bedroom window.

I wonder if anyone remembers the bright orange bouncy space hoppers that you used to sit on and bounce up and down the street on. They still have them I see, but call them retro! One day as kids I was playing with my next door neighbour who was my best friend I have no idea what happened, but we got into an argument in upstairs in my bedroom, and he tried to hit me, next thing I knew I was banging this space hopper off his head, I let go and it went clean through the window. Only problem the window was closed and yes you guessed it, smash , the glass broke and space hopper landed out side with glass everywhere. Just you wait till your Father gets home said my mother. How I wished for a hole to eat me. Punishment : six bloody hard whacks of a gym shoe on my little ass, seriously sore I can tell you!

  • The case of the Blunt pencil.

First day of school and five years old. My class teacher was Mrs Landalls, I shall never forget that name ever! We shall practice our writing now children. Get out your paper and pencils she said. I get my pencil out from my pencil case, get out my paper. Now start to write your full name out as neatly as you can, and I shall come round and see your progress she said. I start to write and realise I am making a mess as my pencil lead broke.

YOU BOY what is your name? Edward I said, Edward what she said. Edward Blount I replied. Well BLOUNT she said in a high pitched screech, come here with your paper and pencil. I took them to her, she looks at me and my pencil.

Hold out you hand, palm down BLOUNT and hurry up. I do as I am told, next thing she gets her wooden ruler, and hits it over my knuckles three times. My hand is stinging and all I hear is YOU WILL NEVER BRING A BLUNT PENCIL TO MY CLASS AGAIN BLOUNT DO YOU UNDERSTAND! She was a crazy mad woman, I remember her red eyes, a bloody sadist I am convinced. But I never did bring a blunt pencil to class again.

  • Wrote my first and last journal

My favourite subject at Primary School was biology. One summer holidays we were told to keep a diary or journal of all the walks and things we did in nature over the summer holidays. It was a cool time, as I went fishing many times and caught different types of fish, went on lots of nature walks and learnt about different trees and flowers. So I wrote all this down and got a special reward for having the best holiday journal. Even though I had fun, I never did do it again, no idea why not to be honest!

So there we have it, I could do more but those ten were the first I thought of!

Thank you for reading you awesome beautiful people.

CopyrightΒ @TengoLoTodoΒ 2021 and yes All Rights Reserved. All images and words are from the author unless source mentioned.

Haste ye back.

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Comments

I can totally imagine you as a kid hehehe, stricter parents have the naughtiest kids hehehe I don't understand why you look like Professor Snape in your display picture

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3 years ago

Oh that's an interesting story! Good thing the queen did not insist on checking your hand. Lol.

Maybe I will join this new challenge too. I dunno. Haha.

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3 years ago

hehe yes that would have been even more embarrassing if I had to show here my hands.

They are fun the challenges to do from time to time.

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3 years ago

Wow, what a nice experience of yours to have met the queen at an early age. Nevermind the lecture you got from your teacher. And oh, strawberries I haven't tried eating one.

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3 years ago

Yes meeting the queen was a great honour. You haven't had a strawberry, well I am sure you will one day :)

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3 years ago

I love the image of hearts made with pencils, what a beautiful story, I would have also liked to meet the queen.

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3 years ago

Thank you, and yes an unforgettable experience meeting the Queen

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3 years ago

I don't like strawberries for they remind me of cough syrup that I used to drink when I was a kid and I hated the taste of that. I like other berries though :D

Do you have a record of that night you sang to the Queen? I hope there's a video of it online.

Mrs. Landalls sounds like a terror teacher lol!

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3 years ago

There is a record somewhere, mine got broken 🀣, and Mrs Landalls she was the worst, really! I don't know of any video as you weren't allowed phones or tape recorders or anything inside.

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3 years ago

Yeeey nice meeting you Daffy's friend HAHAHAHAHA. Anyways, when I was a kid, it was my dream to be a magician's assistant. But I never got the chance tho 😭

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3 years ago

haha the friend of Daffy, I like that! Aww you you wanted to be a magicians assistant, it is not too late you know :)

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3 years ago

Please let me know who he choose between Milly and molly πŸ˜‚

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3 years ago

Hehe you are too funny, yes I will let you know 🀣

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3 years ago

HAHAAHHA

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3 years ago

See you made me laugh again 🀣 you really are funny , and who was that dog you posted in noise, I said are they looking for Daffy 🀣🀣🀣

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3 years ago

Nice to meet you young lovable rascal! I love raspberries and strawberries yep both of them lol and you are so clever when you met the Queen... Aren't you even bothered that you did cut a chunk of your thumb and your fingernail? Doesn't it hurt at all? Lol if it was me i think I'll be honest with the Queen and show her my bleeding thumb πŸ˜‚

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3 years ago

It hurt afterwards big time but yes I was don't show her my bloody handkerchief 🀣🀣 still prefer rasps but I will eat a strawberry now and again !

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3 years ago

hahahaha i'm sure and i can imagine how you control your emotion during that time LOL

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3 years ago

Hehe oh I can be emotionless when required 😜

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3 years ago

πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚ that is something that I'm trying to master

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3 years ago

I thought that is what you are practicing when you are late opening the shop 🀣🀣🀣

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3 years ago

Whaaa you are so mean ,πŸ˜‚πŸ€£πŸ˜‚πŸ€£πŸ˜‚ hmmm think i can do that while I man the shop lol

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3 years ago

haha mean, nah just teasing you ;)

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3 years ago

Omg strawberries are favorite. Why oh why you don't like them. 😁 And about breaking the cross, oh my I can imagine how in trouble you were. Here in our country it's a very very big deal as well.

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3 years ago

I think it was the hard husk bit, I don't like , but yes the cross , oh dear that was not so good πŸ˜‚

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3 years ago

what is wee by the way? 😁 that is sad sir. not letting you eat and beat you for drawing on the wall. your grandpa must be strict hehe just a thought

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3 years ago

Yea parents and grandparents were strict ! Wee is a Scottish term of endearment for small or little

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3 years ago

Wow, performed for the Queen! That was so nice! Good old memories. It's good to be kids again, don't you think so?

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3 years ago

Yes met the Queen and then sang with her in the audience! It is great to be kids, we are all young at heart.

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3 years ago

Yeah, nailed it. ;)

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3 years ago

hehe I think for once I did, have a fantastic Friday :)

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3 years ago

The drilling thing with your brain was so cool. He's really a proffesional magician. :-) I want to see and witness that trick with my own eyes.

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3 years ago

Oo he was a real magician, it was fun, but magic is an illusion.

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3 years ago

Yes magic is an illusion so wag tayong padadala dito.

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3 years ago

haha you don't want magic there πŸ˜‚

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3 years ago

But I really wanted to see it. Curiosity sucks you know that. :-)

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3 years ago

hehe I do, and wish I could show you it.

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3 years ago

We dont know, maybe a day after tomorrow you can show it to me alreadtly. Lol

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3 years ago

haha I wish I could !

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3 years ago

Whenever know what the futures says 😊

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3 years ago

Hehe no we don't 😁

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3 years ago

Ohhhh... you're such a naughty little boy before bro!! hahaha..πŸ˜… But I'm glad to know you more in here.. I guess, you have a lot of fun memories when you were a kid..😊

God bless you..πŸ˜‡

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3 years ago

Haha naughty I guess I was πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚

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3 years ago

As you said so bro!.☺️

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3 years ago

I never tried a strawberry in my whole life sir but I want to.😁 You had a lot of childhood memories, I'm glad to know you with this article ..

God bless you sir...πŸ™β€οΈ

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3 years ago

Wow never had a strawberry, well I admit, lots of fruits you have that I have never tried as well.

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3 years ago

Hehe I want to know what's the taste of strawberry sir ..😊

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3 years ago

Hehe well it tastes like strawberry haha I don't know how to describe

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3 years ago

Hahaha how I wish..😊

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3 years ago

well I see perhaps like a cough syrup!

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3 years ago

Ah... Hehe okay sir. Thank you ..😊

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3 years ago

Well me, I love strawberries ever since, Uncle. I wish someday I can meet a Queen. About makeup, to be honest, I never tried putting some in my face! Yes, in my 21 years of existence. Hahaha.

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3 years ago

You have never work make up, really, hehe well don't start if you don't need to, women are prettier without it I think

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3 years ago

They say simplicity is beauty. Maybe when I started to work. I need to put on some makeup. Haha

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3 years ago

Simplest is best, yes delay it for as long as possible.

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3 years ago

I haven't eat raspberry yet, also any foods that is raspberry flavor hehe, i dont know to my taste maybe because im not used to eat since its hard to find raspberry here als strawberry i once taste it but didn't like it much. You had a so much memory during your childhood good and bad hehez. Im amazed with the name edward, its really confusing tho you have same name in your family.

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3 years ago

I should try to find you some raspberries. Yes was confusing with Edwards haha , but father and I always knew which Edward she would be talking to. But yes am sure we all had good and bad times in our childhood.

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3 years ago

Yes pls kindly deliver it here char. Lol thanks for that kuya Ed (can i call you that way?) hehez.

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3 years ago

Hehe deliver it, well need to find first char 🀣 of course you can call me kuya Ed, wee one

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3 years ago

Raspberry isn't growing here I think. I never did see any. I was surprised that you don't like strawberry. Those are my favourite, with whip cream on top it's delicious, the only way I can have raspberry is if I buy the imported jam and juice which isn't as good as the fresh fruit I guess. Good to read some facts about you when you were a kid.

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3 years ago

yes I think far too hot for raspberries to grow there, but yes raspberries and cream mmhmm my favourite.

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3 years ago

Youuuchie meeting the queen! I'd say you craft well, then uncle eh? All gifts for Edward - large version! I love the breaking the cross story. That was a scary teacher you got!
Ahaha fun childhood memories of uncle ed! This is cute!

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3 years ago

Hehe thank you wee pp, yes whenever I look at my I remember meeting the Queen. Oh yes breaking the cross, more trouble I got into , we actually had one scarier teacher, but I was okay with him. Fun times were had 🀣

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3 years ago

It has been awesome meeting the young rascalπŸ˜‰ You've a full memory of your childhood days, adorable! And imagining about the big socks you must have been disappointed finding themπŸ˜‚ and that beating with a shoe, ouch!

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3 years ago

I know the socks right, I wish I could have seen my face πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚

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3 years ago

I think you were cute then🀣

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3 years ago

what only then 🀣🀣🀣🀣

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3 years ago

You mean up until now? :D

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3 years ago

Hehe no comment

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3 years ago

Haha, okay hands up.πŸ˜‰

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3 years ago

i can not believe that the magician make a hole on your brain .. super lie ever

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3 years ago

Hehe that is it though, magic is an illusion or a big lie 🀣🀣🀣

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3 years ago

But how they do this πŸ€¦β€β™‚οΈ

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3 years ago

Haha we don't know, why we aren't magicians 😁

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3 years ago

Super true haha

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3 years ago

Now, we know where so many creative stories come from. Super Brain! hehe. I can't believe you didn't like strawberries. They are one of my favorites, even though I love raspberries too. Mrs. Landall was a true villain. And I can imagine the emotion when you saw so many Christmas gifts with your name under the tree, LOL. But what I liked the most was that your grandmother used to call you lovable rascal. β™‘ But I have a complaint, where is the pic?

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3 years ago

Yes Mrs Landalls scarred me from a young age, vicious she was! Hehe yes my grandmother when I was at boarding school often came to take her lovable rascal out for tea ! I need to find a pic yes. Super brain hehe yes he installed the story machine to me:)

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3 years ago

The story machine! LOL Well, your grandmother must have been incredible, you little rascal! ;) I think I have a soft spot for grandmothers. ;)

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3 years ago

I think you have a lot of soft spots 😜 , yes she was a great lady, and you will be a wonderful grand mother too !

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3 years ago

Haha, I think so too. ;)

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3 years ago

hehe have you been practicing Pacman, I can see the healines now, Pacman Grandmother goes viral ;)

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3 years ago

Hey, you're teasing me little rascal! I hope to be a grandmother one day, but I expect it to be in a few more years;) And that Pacman tournament I hope it will be before! So put your super brain to work on another headline, haha

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3 years ago

haha me teasing ;) never ! Well I had a new headline created just now, to add some more characters into the melting pot. And yes we have to play Pacman before you become a grandmother ;)

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3 years ago

haha unwrapped all dad's presents! silly lil edward 😁

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3 years ago

Haha greedy lil Edward Mrs P πŸ˜‚

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3 years ago

I know, right? But that was very cute! So what present was your favorite, uncle ed?

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3 years ago

All I remember were these bloody great big socks Mrs P, I would imagine chocolate would have been my best present

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3 years ago

oh haha

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3 years ago

ouch! mother whacks must have hurt and why would you hate him with space hoppers though? what a naughty kid you are..hahhaha

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3 years ago

Haha father's whacks much much worse, I no idea why we were fighting, the space hopper was there so I used it haha

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3 years ago

hahaha poor kid and poor window glass that gets smashed

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3 years ago

Haha an sure poor kid started it πŸ˜‚

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3 years ago

hahaha silly you hahaha

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3 years ago

Haha yes once silly, always silly πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ€£

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3 years ago

lol!!!

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3 years ago