If only I could...

Some things happened in the past that the words "what if" keep running through my mind.

I know I cannot turn back for what has been done, and I never get back what I lost, but these words "If only I could" keeps hunting me to my present.

Here are things that if could only turn my life back and change in my life:

• If only I could turn back time, I want to change myself from being soft-hearted and easily attached to people.

For the past few years, I've been soft-hearted, and easy to get attached to the people surrounding me. I quickly build trust with the people I always talk to, and I'm not too fond of goodbyes. So to please them not to go and not to go away, I make things that favor them,  especially my time and efforts, to show them that I'm grateful that they are there and I'm so dependent on the things that they want to make our relationship that I guess is worth it. And when the times that they will leave, it hurts me like hell, and it leaves scars on my heart that I cannot get rid of quickly.

These things are what I change about me, for being so soft-hearted that somebody will quickly take advantage of me and abuse my emotions, until such, nothing is lefts in me but pain.

• If only I could turn back time, I would take the opportunity to use the days I wasted for nothing.

There are a lot of days in my life that were wasted for nothing. I roamed a lot and wondered without vision, which led me to nothing but regrets. If I could only turn back time, how I wish I had used that time to hustle and work hard, I would not suffer financially.

• If only I could return time, I would never waste my money on material things and pleasure.

This is one thing that I regret most of the time, wasting my money on nothing and investing in something that doesn't last long. The reason why I suffer financially now is the decisions that I made without considering the future. If I could turn back time, how I wish I saved all the money I can now use for better things and valuable investments.

• If only I could turn back time, I learned to say No.

There are a lot of situations I regret the most now for always saying yes to everyone. I wasted all the time instead of making those moments for me to grow up individually. Saying yes consumes all my time and efforts to blend with them and never be out of place.

These are things that keep me wishing how I wish that I could turn back time, and if only I could.

Despite all of these regrets in my life, I'm still grateful that I have learned something that makes me stronger and wiser now. These mistakes have taught me to be better and never repeat everything that breaks me down.

Now, I'm surviving from the past mistakes I encountered in my journey; I am building up myself now to be the best version of my life and be the woman I want to be and want o to become for the following years of my life.

Now that I have learned so much, I will never return to my old self. I will do everything to improve my life, whatever happens, and whatever it takes.

 So for everyone struggling from the past, move on and look forward to the things you have right now. Keep going and never come back. Use the things that happened in the past to motivate you. And be the best version of who you are now.

Trust yourself; you can do it if you believe!

Hello everyone! 🙂 Happy Wednesday to all! Keep safe and be happy! 🙂