Am I ready?

Date: March 29,2022
Author: Sequoia

First of all, I should have already finished this article a while ago if I just didn't fell asleep this afternoon. Sometimes, I just want to punch myself right in the face because of being so careless and not disciplined enough. I still have a lot of things to accomplish before this day ends but I just choose to be slave of my own sleepiness. GRRRRR.

Be that as it may, the careless action has been done and I should just accept the reality that I will have to sleep deprive myself again this evening. On the other hand, I felt like my body is thanking me for letting it rest for almost 4 hours. The good thing about it is I feel fresh and energized. By the way, enough with all my ramblings and regrets and let's proceed directly to my topic for today.

Please fasten your seat belt and ready yourself for the take off. I will tour you to what's happening inside my brain and the things that is bugging me for these past few weeks.

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Let me disclose the questions that's been bugging;

AM I READY TO GRADUATE?

• Am I? Oh let me rephrase my question, can I really graduate? For those who are clueless, I am a graduating student and is expecting to march to the stage this coming June, year 2022. Back then, I keep on thinking on when can I graduate since I am already so tired in studying. I just want to finish this season so that, I will be free to do my wants-travel the world, get a high paying job, eat the foods that I want and spoil my family. I am so occupied with the idea of graduating that I almost forgot to really enjoy every bit of my college years. Now that we are slowly getting to the end, there's a part of me that wishes to extend this. Maybe because, I am scared with the idea that when I finished college, that'll be also the end of my care free moments.

AM I READY TO FACE THE REAL WOLRD?

• Graduating means facing the real world. This idea is making me shiver because of uncontainable fear that is slowly forming within my heart. Just imagine, I haven't graduated yet but the responsibilities that I am shouldering right now is like a full grown up woman who has promising career already. The idea of being not a student anymore somewhat gives me pressures. I don't know if I can do it right or if I am able to even start it. I've seen this world sluggishly becoming worst and I don't know if I can survive this. Needles to say that I am have already responsibilities waiting for me. Just by writing this, my mind went off somewhere and I having a hard time gathering my thoughts. Facing the real world means a lot of responsibilities to endure and expectations to meet. My heart is troubled and full of doubt. My mind is occupied with the things that I shouldn't be thinking in the first place. I wanted to cry my heart out and spill everything that's been bugging me. I don't know how to put this in words but I still have faith that the Lord will never leave me nor forsake me.

AM I EQUIP ENOUGH?

• This is somehow a very tough question. Am I equip enough. Am I knowledgeable enough with the course that I have? Is teaching really my vocation? Will I be able to deliver the right information and touch the students lives with being a teacher? Will be effective? A lot of queries going on with my head and I just don't know how to cope up with it. For now, the only thing that I can do for myself and my future students is to expand my knowledge and be the best teacher that I can be.

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Author's Viewpoint

Please bear with my negativity, rants and ramblings. I just need to let this out of my chest, to at least lessen the burden that I am carrying. I will be forever grateful with this platform and all of you. Please bear with inconsistency. I will surely try my best to make it up to you all this coming days. When I feel better and light. For now, keep safe and may the Lord bless you even more.