What's Your Point?

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2 years ago

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Everyone wants to speak but very few want to listen. We have all developed the art of speaking - wanting to be heard whereas we don't even listen. This cuts across every aspect of our lives too because we expect people to understand us whereas we are not willing to understand another person's point of view. We always want to see things from our lens while ignoring the rights of others to things.

5+4 is obviously 9, so is 8+1 and 6+3... The bottom line is, we have to be able to reach a logical conclusion with others. As long as things get done, it doesn't have to be only from our view. Learning from others help us more than we can know because it gives us diversity that can help to make a better and informed decision. Most people don't grow because they only want things done the way they want. It becomes a power tussle rather than a solution. They ignore the main course of action and make everything about them because they just want to be heard.

I understand that we all want to speak our minds to make it known that we won't have our rights trampled upon, as a sign of freedom. We have those people who feel the need to address everything and just wouldn't overlook some tiny details too. The world is wild, just as some humans would only stick to their side of the story without minding whose ox is gored.

Humans are naturally selfish and that's why we focus on ourselves regardless of how it makes others feel. It is about what we want, what we can get and I have seen a lot of people manipulate others with words just to achieve a hidden agenda. I do see between the politics in human nature and can't help but smile. They are not being mean, no, far from it but they are just being human, that's all.

In the process where we just want to be heard and stick to only our view, we most of the time fail to perfectly weigh the actions and the outcomes of things. We ignore the blind spot since we are focused on only one thing; our view. We live in a world where most people speak before they can even think and when they now realize the consequences of their actions, things must have gotten way out of control. Someone once joked that we need to be careful of those who know the answer even before a question is asked and that's the truth. It shows someone who is always willing to speak without even trying to understand the situation of things.

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It's a fragile world and as wild as humans are, words can break us. Harsh words might break no bones but you can't doubt that it can break a heart and a hundred bones with no heart means there is no life. So, when you break hearts, you are killing a lot of people, so I am going to ask you, how many people have you killed?

As people of conscience and consideration, we need to learn to give more love rather than just a piece of our mind. Many people want to give a piece of their mind without weighing the consequences. I am not against pointing things out to people but how are you doing it? There is a 'how' to talk. Most people hear more than we say sometimes because of the way we explain things. This is why most people have issues unresolved because of 'how' they went about it but I still need to say that there are times we need to overlook some things.

We have to understand which issue to address and what we need not address. We need to ask ourselves, "What point am I trying to prove and to what extent?" This would help us to know what to say, how to say it and also know what not to say - things to overlook. If it is about getting things out of your mind and without the intention of making the other person better, you can be sure you won't say it the right way because I have seen people address 'the person' rather than the issue and when we get to that point, it gets ugly because naturally, the other person would want to fight back and defend. Never attack the 'person' whenever you are addressing any issue.

We need to let the power of love override the love of power. Most people feel the need to fuel their ego and oppress others because they want to make them their subjects. We are expected to have an aura as human beings, not an odour. If you take a deep look at things, most of the things we address doesn't worth it. They are situations that don't really matter but we get entangled with them because we just want to feel right. Life should be about consideration for one another even though we know most people are naturally selfish...

We can learn to give people a piece of us rather than just a piece of our mind. We can help by cutting people some slacks and looking the other way. Yes, there are issues we must address but there are those we don't need to sweat about. We need to ask what the end goal is. What's the point you are trying to prove? If you can honestly answer this, it makes your choice of knowing what to address and what not to address easier.

Thank you for your time.

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2 years ago

Comments

This is a great article. I think everyone could do with giving themselves space to take a breath before speaking. Be truly mindful when you are listening. Hear what the person is saying to you and what they are not saying. Don't interrupt, let them flow. When they share their troubles, they are not always looking for someone to give them a solution, maybe they just need an ear lent to them for a while to vent, bat ideas off. And if we are in a more heated type of discussion with them, we do have to ask what points am I scoring? Why do I feel the need to win here? Does there have to be a winner/loser? Whatever we all choose to do, we can at least be kind.

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2 years ago

Absolutely. I enjoyed your deep understanding of the post. Thank you for this valuable input.

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2 years ago

I was just thinking about this today That we tend to judge other people's actions on our scales And if it isn't the same then they are wrong

I love your mathematical analogy - it is spot on :D

Here via @dreemport

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2 years ago

I am so glad you enjoyed it. Thank you so much. Deeply appreciated.

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2 years ago

5 + 4 is 9 in the system we’re using, but it can also equal 4 or 0 πŸ˜…πŸ˜…πŸ˜…

$ 0.02
2 years ago

Mooooo πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ€£πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ€£ don't kill me with laughter.

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2 years ago

Speaking of not listening to other but want people to listen to us human generally does that but some doesn't do it Intentionally but some does

I love listening to people but when someone is trying to take me for granted coz am listening then I give them the piece of my mind Sorry for saying it all but that's me in person

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2 years ago

I totally understand you. We've all been there. Listening is an art we all need to cultivate.

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2 years ago

😁

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2 years ago

" harsh words might not break bones, but they do break hearts, and a hundred bones without a heart is no life". This is so cool ☺

$ 0.02
2 years ago

Yaaaaaay. Thank you, my dear.

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2 years ago

Most people only know when to talk but they don't know how to talk, some persons don't even know why they talk, they just feel they should talk because others are talking

$ 0.03
2 years ago

Hahahaha that is so true.

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2 years ago

I believe that we should just not depend on ourselves. We still need others decision for us to grow and succeed. Nothings wrong with listening to others opinion.

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2 years ago

That's true...we can always learn from others.

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2 years ago

We must listen to others. They come to us with their problems. We need to listen them.

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2 years ago

Even when they want to explain...whether it makes sense or not... let's listen to them.

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2 years ago

Seek first to understand, then to be understood. Our tendency is to prepare our next comment, while the other person is talking and as a result we don't really listen. If we listen sincerely, we'll surely find the deeper issue. When trying to understand someone, the best thing we can do is to be silent and listen. It's not we are ignoring them, but we're just absorbing what they are trying to say, and were just given them the chance to express themselves without being cut off.

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2 years ago

This is brilliant and so accurate, my friend. I enjoyed this. Absolutely spot on and true.

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2 years ago

After reading your article made me think if how many people I had killed or did I? I admit i was so tactless in my younger years maybe until I reach early 20's. I just became mindful of my words when I was 25 I guess It's the time I met my husband. Well he was indeed a good influence as of now I have learned to manage to pick the right choice of words. Not only that, to weigh some things too before I react.

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2 years ago

I am so glad he was able to help and give you guidance as to when to speak and how to speak. It's a good gift to have.

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2 years ago

Whenever I feel like blurting out my thoughts to someone I disagree with, I take lots of breathing exercises πŸ˜‚ to calm myself down. Then I try to make that person finish, to say my thoughts afterwards, in still, a calm manner. πŸ˜‚

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2 years ago

Hahahaha that's really the best way to go about it hahahaha. Some had been adviced to count 1-10 if they are angry and 1-100 if they are very angry πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ€£πŸ˜‚

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2 years ago

We need not to make mere decisions based on how we see it another person might sees it better so we have to listen and learn ideas from each other. It’s true that humans are naturally selfish sure.

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2 years ago

Yes, we are. We just want to be heard forgetting the rights of the other person too.

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2 years ago

The fact that I am right does not mean the other person is wrong. That is where communication comes into play. I can see number 6 from where I'm standing and the person opposite me sees number 9. Neither of us is wrong, we just have different perceptions and way of reasoning. But not many people understands this.

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2 years ago

That's right. Not many people understand that.

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2 years ago

People words really matter and are powerful. We should listen more than we talk.

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2 years ago

Absolutely true.

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2 years ago

I give chance to the people so that they can tell me their feelings. I assure that I will listen till the end. They speak and feel the pleasure. Then I speak.

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2 years ago

I love doing that too

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2 years ago

All we ever wanted is to say what is in our mind not minding what others would want to say. We feel our idea is the best whereas, we need to give a chance to the other perhaps he or she might have something good too. We just need to listen.

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2 years ago

New Laptop owner, that's right...we need to listen too.

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2 years ago

What if someone asks me something? I'll blurt it out!😁 And blurt it out. But blurt it out with confidence! That's called a point of view.

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2 years ago

πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ€£πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚ that's why I said there are situations that requires it and some times we don't have to...depending on the situation. God knows I've blurted out many times too πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ€£

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2 years ago

Truth is people need to learn to control what they say amd how they say it. Because what they say doesn't always matter but the "how". For instance I felt like smashing the nearest object on my cousin this morning after je said something really stupid and still didn't realise he was wrong.

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2 years ago

That can really be frustrating... I totally understand... You can make him realize it when you have gotten past that anger.

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2 years ago

I wasn't angry.. I simply told him the statement he made was wrong and disrespectful yet he was asking me what was wrong in his statement. Can you imagine the audacity. I first imagined the age difference and felt like smashing his head with the nearest object.

It's not anger It's just that examples need to be set. I act based on logic not emotions..

In the end his parents complain about the same thing- the inability to think before talking, even his 15 year old ounher brother says the same thing.

If I had my way I'd register him at the psychiatric ward.

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2 years ago

πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ€£πŸ€£ it's obviously he is terrible with communication. That's why I said some people think after they have acted and he seemed to be in that bracket.

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2 years ago

Psychiatric ward is the best bet. Or maybe I should get him locked up in a cell for one week. He'd be a better person when he's back

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2 years ago

Lmaaaaaaao.

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2 years ago