What Do We Say To This?
It's hard to understand humans sometimes and it's scary to see how people would act just to be controlling. See, it's not a crime if you feel marriage isn't for you because there are so many people hoping and willing to get out of it if they know better before now. I always say that there is no need to rush it and while waiting, what are you doing with your life?
So many people are waiting for marriage and they are not developing themselves. They are not even doing their best to be a better version of themselves, so how do you want them to do better when they have another life to care for? You need to be a better human before you invite another human into your life. A lot of people still have character flaws and they want to go into marriage with them hoping the other person would accept them the way they are. The truth is, can you even accept yourself the way you are?
We pile up so much pressure on our significant half all because we want them to be understanding. We want to push them sometimes to see if they truly care. If you truly care you wouldn't put another person in a position where you would have to see if they care or not because there are so many things you could have watched out for to know and see they care.
I've read stories and situations where a guy would pack plates or clothes for a lady to see if she is the "wife material". What nonsense! Who determines these kinds of nonsense? I've also seen situations where the lady would keep asking the guy for money because she wanted to "test" him to see if he is capable. This boils down to the fact that most people going into marriages or relationships of whatever kind are going for selfish reasons; what they stand to gain at the end of everything.
If someone cares about you, you will know without having to test the person. If someone is a giver, you would know without having to conjure up a situation to see whether he or she would give or not. Most people waste away the time they are to use to get to know someone with activities that don't make sense. Just because two lips met doesn't mean two hearts joined. A night full of passion can turn out to be a night full of pain. There are so many things to watch out for to get your answers but no, they are busy wasting time away rather than getting to know that person.
I read a very annoying story online and I couldn't help but get pissed by it. That's the story I shared up there and you would agree with me that that husband is nothing but selfish, self centered and plain evil. What he did was sheer wickedness with total disregard for consequences. How can you trigger your symptoms intentionally on your wife's off day just because you want to provoke a reaction of care from her? She's going through a lot already by footing the bills and getting things done for you. Just one off-day in a matter of weeks where she should relax so she won't burn out and yet you decided to add more to an already existing pressure?
I call these types of people manipulators. It's not gendered specific but just about the kind of human they are. They will act the part where they paint the picture to others that they are the victim whereas they are the ones who is evil. They play on the emotions of others just because they want to be controlling and have things their way. They don't care about anyone else but what they want. They use the emotion card and gather sympathy so they can blame others for their shortfalls and unsuspecting people would fall for it and blame the person who has been putting his or her neck on the line the whole time.
A lot of people won't see the efforts you are putting in and sadly, some partners would want you to kill yourself all for them and still tell you that you haven't done anything. That's the way with so many people and this is why we need to watch out for people's content before feeling our souls with them. Some people are incapable of growth and when you see the red flag, please dust your sandals and run. I can't believe that the husband would be that evil and inconsiderate when he is utterly useless. You are Pizza intentionally to provoke a reaction after you have been warned and you have the right to complain to people that you were not cared for? Are you 5 years old?
They used to say in my language that when the fly is perching on someone with wounds, the world would not see it but when that wounded person decided to kill the fly, everyone would turn around and call that person wicked. There are some evil things that people do behind the scene that others won't see and most people would not want to believe it because they are judging the situation based on how they used to know the person.
Before you take a further step in the kind of person to marry, please, focus on learning more about the person. Not just what they say but the things they are saying when they are not talking.
Thank you for your time.
My pen doesn't bleed, it speaks. I am love's chemical content in human form and that's why I advise people to take a dose of "Olawalium" daily. π
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Selfish people don't deserve to be in a relationship