Be Careful About What You Are Learning.

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I shared a post yesterday about the importance of learning and the various ways in which we learn. You can read the post here: "Learning Never Stops"

In as much as we are learning, we should be careful about the things we learn. There is wisdom in learning and also the application of what you are learning. Not everything you learned can be applied and that's the truth especially when you think about where you are from in terms of location, religion, environment and culture too. There are a lot of factors that would determine whether you can apply some of the things you learnt or not.

Often timing is very important when we want to apply what we have learnt. What's the essence of learning a thing and yet the application is wrong? We need to consider various factors before we apply our learnings.

Learning is wonderful, don't get me wrong but we should be more intentional about the things we are learning and how applicable it would be for our setting. There are so many things that teach you things that go against the 'norms' depending on where you are from. What are you learning? Are you learning the things that go against your culture or you are learning about things that can advance you? Are you putting others into consideration because what's the essence of learning if you cannot teach it? How you teach is dependent on the lessons you have learnt sometimes.

The effect or let me say the benefits of what we are learning should always play in our minds and we shouldn't just jump at just anything all because we want to do things the way others are doing them.

I watched this foreign movie many years ago when I was just fresh out of Secondary School (College). A child was accused of something and I think he didn't do it so his parents called him and asked him if he did it. He told them he didn't do it but still, he saw doubts on the faces of his parents. He was a bit disappointed and blurted out "It's hard enough that everyone thought I did it but it's worse having even my parents doubt and question me" and he walked away and told them he would be fine and slammed his door.

I was impressed with his choice of words and I was waiting for the opportunity to use it. You know when the only thing you have is a nail, every problem would appear to you as though it needed a nail to fix it. That was what happened to me. I was waiting for the opportunity to use it so I picked a very wrong time to do that and yet it was still a wrong application of what I "learnt".

I love words and that's why when I read people's posts, it might be just a particular word that struck me that I would pick and talk on. The same way when I read a book or watch a movie or even listen to a song, I love it when people play with words and that was why I picked up that statement in that movie. I can't even remember what happened in that movie anymore 😂😂😂🤣🤣.

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Fast forward to when I entered the University. My dad sent me some money and precisely it was around 2 weeks so I exhausted that money. I was in my 3rd year then. As usual, I messaged him and told him I needed more money because I have exhausted it. I am good with words so I knew I composed the best of text without any insult or being rude. I saw his response and told me how I exhausted the money in just two weeks and I told him the line of what I learnt in the movie above 🤣🤣🤣😂😂.  Can you see what I meant when I said when the only thing you have is a nail, every problem would appear as though they required a nail? I shouldn't have even used that line even though I tweaked it for him a little.

So, I replied to him and told him "I had so many things to buy especially with our demanding lecturers and it wasn't last week dad, it was two weeks ago. Having to go through the stress of school is bad enough but having my dad doubt me on how I spent the money is worse. Don't worry about me, I will be fine." 😂😂🤣🤣😂😂😂 That was what I sent to him and I noticed he didn't reply. He called my two brothers to tell them what I sent and I noticed my phone was ringing with calls from left and right.

My first brother called me and told me I have no sense for sending that 😂😂😂🤣😂 and the second one perfectly and calmly told me that he said I should pack my things and leave school because he is not willing to continue paying for my school again since I said I will be fine. We later squashed it out and I apologized and he sent me some money. I picked the wrong lesson and applied it without respect for my culture because we don't do that here nor ever try that with an African parent. Apart from my wrong application, my timing was terrible because I know him to be very jovial neither did I know he was in pain at that time as he was sick but no one told me because they didn't want me to worry while I was close to writing my exams.

It wasn't long after, I felt uneasy and I demanded to go home from the school authorities. We take "exeat" once a month and since I hardly go home, I requested for it on a Friday but I should have applied since Wednesday but I didn't. I started feeling uneasy on Friday and tried my luck. I even went to meet our Chaplain then to beg him to consider me and check that I hardly travel and in all fairness he gave me.

I was at the gate signing out when the Chaplain told my best friend in school to ask me to come back to his office. I was scared because I thought he wanted to take it back. My best friend found me at the gate in time and relayed his message to me. I got to his office and my best friend was there and they asked me to sit down it was there and then I knew something terrible must have happened. Writing this is making me have goosebumps and yes, I just shed some tears.

My girlfriend back then that I used to send love notes to through my dad has the number of my best friend when he visited me that time. She was the one that called my best friend who quickly ran to the Chaplain before I was called back into his office. They volunteered to take me home that day. They drove me down and my brothers and uncle still didn't know I had known when they saw me alighting from the car. They were still teasing me for being rich to have booked an Uber but how could it be an Uber when my best friend was there with two Chaplains (even though they didn't know they were my chaplains).

Okay, I can't go further with this story because I didn't want to cry all over again but I know it's okay to cry but still, I will just stop the story right here.

The bottom line of what I was trying to say is that you don't have to apply everything you think you've "learnt". Timing is important and I didn't know he was sick that time that I blurted out my words. I am glad we settled it afterwards and we laughed even about it but that's humans - we feel we can do what we like without thinking about what the other person is going through. This is why timings being calm and considerate is important. We should be more sensitive and considerate to others, even in the things we learn.

Thank you for your time.