What I Realized Being Far Away From My Parents.
I'm always trying my best during the time that I am still living to tem, I try t understand everything and anthing accordin to my own understanding and idea, but not all the time I can figure out what's the best for veryone, and what's the best for me.
They knew that i'm nt that kkind of person where I usually do m sual things juust to make me happy, yet that one is insulting me already since I knew that all of the time they can't understand my side and they will never ever listening to me. I understand that they are my parents and ofcourse I am oblidged t listen to hem and to follow themm. But there ar times where II can't anage t understand something that is from them.
I have a huge expectation that everything will change when I'm not there, but instead I am wrong. I talked to my niece last day and I opened up to her about what I think and what's on my mind. She also told me that they have another issue at my famiy because my sister caught covid for the 3rd time already, ofcourse I know they will be feel stressed again because the source of my income was only my step sister on my father's side.
There are few things that I realized when I got here to Baguio recenty, alllow me to share them.
Even if I'm away, everything wil not be change.
I realized that no matter how we tried to understand everthing, we'll be end up stuck on one thing where we knew nothing will change. I'm trying my best to be okay on thhe things that im not supposed to think enough.
Do I have a wish? Yes, we all have a wish where w think it's better than oher things. My only wish is, I'm hoping one day that my parents will changed and their mind will be open just like what am I wishing for.
They will not understand what I feel because their focus is only at their want.
My niece told me this last niight when I talk to her. She said, no matter how I tried to talk and tel them at I really feel it's so rare that they will listen r they will gonna understand my feeling. I couldn't agree more because even before, they alawys like that already.
Wanna know the reason why? They ony focus on the past, I mean, for them the past is the reflection of what you are right now and a reflection f what you be in the future, That's how they look into you without having their own bsuiness because they will going to judge you easy related on the past that they already seen.
I am their daughter but what I can hear from the is the wrong doings of my step siblings years ago, it's hard for me t understand their intention since they always like that. e, all of the new geneation of the family was strugglng because of wrong doings that was happened before. It was so hard to understand them since that always telling other people a different story.
They only believe on what they think is correct, than asking you first.
They will not allow you to make a decision because hey think it was nothing and it was the worst decision ever. Idk what's on their mind but whenever that you sharing any of your ideas and plan, they will judging you all of sudden.
imagine? having a parents who have ths kind of mindset.
Lately, I hate explaining my side to them and I hate telling more thigs if I have a plan or whatever it is. It makes me tired tryng to explain my side and trying to understand their side too.
I am planning to take a rest for a while while gaining a peace of mind. That's all I'm planning right now. My head is spinning thinking about things that's happening right now, especially the attitude of my mother.
My nice who's in the same age of me tried to borrow a mone from them but they didn't give it. tbh, I a the one who feel insulted because of their doings.
Final Thoughts.
Naiinis ako kasi ayaw ko sa lahat yung sakim sa pera, 100 lang yun eh di na kalakihan tapos pagdadamutan pa. Sobrang higpit nila sa pera nakakaasar.
OfficaialGamboaLikeUs
March26.2022
ayaw ko talaga mag comment when it comes to issues with parents kasi magkaiba tayo nang prinsipyo over that matters. i just hope langga that you find the peace of mind that you deserved.