Forgiveness is an integral role but is it possible to forgive and forget? And should you
I am sure we have all heard of the adage "forgive and forget. Sound good, but can we really forgive an offense and forget about it? the impression is to keep peace and to maintain a calm mind and because this adage has been handed out for ages, we might think it is grounded in deep wisdom.*
It might be a word of wisdom, but easy? No, definitely not. You Can forgive but is not easy to forget.
There are two types of forgiveness:
The decisional forgiveness: This is a decision you make consciously to let go of emotions that hurt you, such as anger and bitterness, taking them as the things of the past and moving on with life without letting our sensations control us.
Emotional forgiveness: Emotional forgiveness can lead to a higher level of forgetting than decisional forgiveness because it's a situation where negative emotions are being replaced with positive ones, such as showing empathy, kindness, and tenderness toward the person who wronged you
But does forgiveness requires us to forget? Not necessarily.
Forgiving an offense can be hard, " forgiving and forgetting " shows that you have moved on with life and no longer think about the painful act. But not always possible for some people in every situation because it can be difficult to forgive someone when you know how they've hurt you.
There are many reasons why you should forgive even if part of you doesn't want to.
1) Forgiveness does not permit their actions: when you forgive someone, it doesn't mean that what happened is OK, and it doesn't mean you can still welcome that person in your life, your boundaries still matter. There was a reason why meet each other and there's also a reason why you are moving part. Forgiving means you have made peace with the pain that had been made in you and that you are ready to let go.
2) Forgiveness is not for other people: When we are forgiving, we don't do it for others but for our sake.
We will be trapped in a jail cell of bitterness if we find it difficult to forgive we are doing nothing but serving time for someone else crime, and we find ourselves in anger and depression. But above all, an unforgiving act is like stagnation, it will prohibit future growth and discovery. And when you don't forgive, you're poisoning yourself slowly and secretly hoping the other person does. Dwelling in the pain caused by others without moving on is your discretion.
3) forgiveness is a sign of strength: A great man said and I quote βThe weak can never forgive. Forgiveness is an attribute of the strong.β ~Mahatma Gandhi Source
A person who forgives with the pain being faced is a strong person, the ability to forgive has little to do with what the person did. The only person who can make a shift to transpire and also be in control of your emotions, thoughts, and actions is YOU.
4) We also deserve forgiveness: The lack of acceptance for others may even cause a lack of acceptance for ourselves. Our inability to forgive others can make it so difficult to forgive ourselves too. Others deserve forgiveness just like we do.
5) forgiveness is healing: Our entire body-mind suffers when we hold on to pain, grievance, guilt, and resentment from the past. We benefit from our act of forgiveness even if the person isn't aware and this is the most beautiful form of love that gives you a sense of peace and happiness in return.
Note:
It is not always apparent to forget, but we learn, each experience we encounter teaches us something. Finding it hard to forgive has a negative effect on our health, we might have heard about the phrase " being eaten up inside". The more we hold on to resentment and anger, the more problems we created for ourselves. And those feelings can lead to an increase in blood pressure and this can lead to potential heart problems due to inflammation
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One can never go wrong by forgiving just like what you said...its about one of the few kind acts remaining in the world