Does Forgiveness Requires Us To Forget?

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2 years ago

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Forgiveness is an integral role but is it possible to forgive and forget? And should you

I am sure we have all heard of the adage "forgive and forget. Sound good, but can we really forgive an offense and forget about it? the impression is to keep peace and to maintain a calm mind and because this adage has been handed out for ages, we might think it is grounded in deep wisdom.*

It might be a word of wisdom, but easy? No, definitely not. You Can forgive but is not easy to forget.

There are two types of forgiveness:

  • The decisional forgiveness: This is a decision you make consciously to let go of emotions that hurt you, such as anger and bitterness, taking them as the things of the past and moving on with life without letting our sensations control us.

  • Emotional forgiveness: Emotional forgiveness can lead to a higher level of forgetting than decisional forgiveness because it's a situation where negative emotions are being replaced with positive ones, such as showing empathy, kindness, and tenderness toward the person who wronged you

But does forgiveness requires us to forget? Not necessarily.

Forgiving an offense can be hard, " forgiving and forgetting " shows that you have moved on with life and no longer think about the painful act. But not always possible for some people in every situation because it can be difficult to forgive someone when you know how they've hurt you.

There are many reasons why you should forgive even if part of you doesn't want to.

1) Forgiveness does not permit their actions: when you forgive someone, it doesn't mean that what happened is OK, and it doesn't mean you can still welcome that person in your life, your boundaries still matter. There was a reason why meet each other and there's also a reason why you are moving part. Forgiving means you have made peace with the pain that had been made in you and that you are ready to let go.

2) Forgiveness is not for other people: When we are forgiving, we don't do it for others but for our sake.

We will be trapped in a jail cell of bitterness if we find it difficult to forgive we are doing nothing but serving time for someone else crime, and we find ourselves in anger and depression. But above all, an unforgiving act is like stagnation, it will prohibit future growth and discovery. And when you don't forgive, you're poisoning yourself slowly and secretly hoping the other person does. Dwelling in the pain caused by others without moving on is your discretion.

3) forgiveness is a sign of strength: A great man said and I quote β€œThe weak can never forgive. Forgiveness is an attribute of the strong.” ~Mahatma Gandhi Source

A person who forgives with the pain being faced is a strong person, the ability to forgive has little to do with what the person did. The only person who can make a shift to transpire and also be in control of your emotions, thoughts, and actions is YOU.

4) We also deserve forgiveness: The lack of acceptance for others may even cause a lack of acceptance for ourselves. Our inability to forgive others can make it so difficult to forgive ourselves too. Others deserve forgiveness just like we do.

5) forgiveness is healing: Our entire body-mind suffers when we hold on to pain, grievance, guilt, and resentment from the past. We benefit from our act of forgiveness even if the person isn't aware and this is the most beautiful form of love that gives you a sense of peace and happiness in return.

Note:

It is not always apparent to forget, but we learn, each experience we encounter teaches us something. Finding it hard to forgive has a negative effect on our health, we might have heard about the phrase " being eaten up inside". The more we hold on to resentment and anger, the more problems we created for ourselves. And those feelings can lead to an increase in blood pressure and this can lead to potential heart problems due to inflammation

Thanks for your time.
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2 years ago

Comments

One can never go wrong by forgiving just like what you said...its about one of the few kind acts remaining in the world

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2 years ago

Just like a famous saying, to err is human, but forgiving is Devine... Thanks for stopping by.

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2 years ago

Forgetting is never a easy task, the hurts will still be there just like the decisional like you mentioned above.

$ 0.02
2 years ago

You just popped out of nowhere, good to see you back.

$ 0.02
2 years ago

Lol, yeah I've been busy... Glad to be back .....

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2 years ago

maybe the most difficult thing is to forgive because honestly what happens is most people say sorry only from the mouth but in the heart continue to harbor a bitter taste. It's better to tell the truth than to have an unbearable feeling.

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2 years ago

I agree with you, it's not easy to forgive because some people don't mean it, deep down , they don't feel sorry for what they did, but we have to forgive for us to have peace.... At time the best we can do is to avoid those people.

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2 years ago

Forgetting is never part of forgiveness, cause when u forget about what the person did, the person is likely to repeat it again.

$ 0.02
2 years ago

We can forgive, but if the person keep on hurting you, it better to set your boundaries in this kind of situation, but that doesn't mean that you're still angry with the person.

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2 years ago

Forgiveness is possible but as to forgetting, that may not be totally possible. The human mind is like a computer CPU. When an information is stored in it, you cannot totally delete it.

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2 years ago

Absolutely right, one can only forget something unless one have a memory lost. We can just forgive so as to have peace of mind ....

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2 years ago