Conflicts in a relationship are normal. When there is none at all, it's either the relationship is superficial or feelings and differences are being suppressed and neglected. A relationship without conflict is questionable. As long as differences are present, conflicts are imminent. However, it is not encouraged. Thus, the need for effective conflict resolution.
How does conflict arise?
When individuals oppose each other's opinions and ideas, there is a high chance for conflict to happen. Especially when the concerned parties think differently and find it difficult to accept each other's differences. Usually, conflicts are not easy to control, but if left unchecked, they can destroy peace, lower productivity, and demotivate people.
Here are some of the skills necessary for effective conflict resolution.
Develop effective communication skills
Conflicts are best resolved when ideas are presented well. Always take note of your speech and the way you speak - your tone, your gestures, and facial reactions. Never shout at anyone even if you do not agree with him. Be polite, always. Keep a tight rein of your tongue even in the heat of discussion. Do not use words that will aggravate the other person. Be precise and specific in your speech. Never resort to name-calling and ad hominem remarks.
Listen more, listen first
It is impolite to interrupt the other person while he is talking. Be a good listener. Do not give an expert opinion unless and until the point presented by the other person is clear and fully understood. Don't just jump to conclusions and assume things. Listen to the other side of the story.
Have a positive mindset
Never play the blame game. In any conflict, the goal must be resolution and not winning the argument. Avoid backbiting. If you don't agree with anyone's views, discuss your stance professionally and respectfully. Don't find faults in others and be a little adjusting and understanding. If you find out that you are in the wrong, have the courage to accept it. Always bear in mind that it is better to win the person and save the relationship than to win the argument.
Verify facts and solicit inputs
If the conflict involves a group, do not just follow the rumors blindly and take sides haphazardly. Verify facts and discuss the matter with others. If possible, encourage an open forum set up where all the participants must give their inputs. No one should be left behind and ignored. Everyone has a right to express his views and as a group, create a workaround in the situation. Usually, votation works best. But make sure that everyone gets recognized.
Be impartial
When resolving conflict, partiality is required. Just because the other party is your friend or has given you any favor in the past does it mean that you have to side with him. Stand by what is correct and never support what is wrong. Truth always hurts but it sets people free. Any individual, even if he is your friend, must be corrected if he is in the wrong. Partiality spoils good relationships and sound judgment.
Educate, not humiliate
Educate, not humiliate. Inform the person in the wrong and do not criticize him nor make fun of him. Even if the other person is not as intelligent as you are, you do not have the right to make fun of him and his arguments. People will lose respect when they see that you attack people personally and make fun of their ideas and soon they will find it difficult to trust you nor open up to you. On the contrary, they will look up to you when they see that you guide them and make them realize their mistakes in a non-condescending manner.
Be extra patient
In resolving conflicts, patience is necessary. If you lose your steam, all efforts will be in vain. The saying that patience is a virtue is not just a good proverb. It works wonders. No one wants to get acquainted with a short-tempered person. Impatient people are like ticking timebombs. There would be people at your workplace and even at home who would try to provoke you. Keep control of your emotions. Do not lose your temper only to regret it later. Be very sensible and patient.
Learn when to stay away
Conflict resolution sometimes gets too exhausting. One party gets too adamant on his end of the bargain and doesn't want to compromise. Ignore the person who is too demanding and sucks the life of everyone involved. For your sanity, learn to distance yourself from toxic people. Sometimes our best course of action in a conflict is to stay away.
Conflict resolution is an essential skill. We will never know when these will be of use. And even if there are no conflicts, these tips will be very useful in avoiding one.
Do you have other tips you can add to the list? Share in the comments below!
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Hi, I am Marts! I am a writer, and aside from my stint here in read.cash, I also have my own blog - martsvalenzuela.com. I appreciate it if you pay me a visit! I plan on growing my readership as I learn to improve my craft and journey towards my passion to write and publish books that add value to people.
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