Unique Families

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Avatar for LykeLyca
2 years ago
Topics: Society

Family, as I have known in my childhood school days, is the basic unit of society. Indeed, it is true to its definition, but nowadays, a family became a complex structure.

A few months back I have written an article about "Happiness or the best," it's about this Korean drama of a dysfunctional family where children are controlled by egocentric parents and the norm of the family's status in society. Truly a heartbreaking story of a child being born from these kind of families.

But, problematic people aren't parents only, some are the children too.

In my work I can't help notice the family of each patient I've come across. Sometimes families can be as conventional as the old days, the children are supportive, they regularly bond with their parents, and the concern is just overwhelming.

However, you may also find unique families, with super awesome to unfortunately calloused children, that often times caring for their patients and parents can be so emotionally draining. And this burden is more exhausting than the energy I have to exert physically for them.

Ironically, some elderly patients have five, six, seven children with great jobs and businesses respectively, but failed to provide the attention and financial needs of their parents. The son works as a seaman on international vessel, daughters who are nurses overseas, an architect and engineer, everyone is earning so well yet no one can pay for the CT Scan and no one can buy the medicines. Just so heartbreaking. How can someone be so insensitive to the needs of their sick and old parents?

Sometimes, I thought that having children does not guarantee that someone will be there for you on your death bed. Any mother or father can suffer and die alone and lonely. This is a sad reality as I see sometimes in elderly patients.

I have this 76 year old patient who lives with her 75 year old husband that I visit three times a week. Though they have two sons working abroad that could provide financially, but no one is around physically to support them in their needs. Thus, I have to offer some of my time to assist them in going to the hospital for bloodworks and stuffs like that. This is not part of my job, but I can't resist helping a patient who really needs help in moving around, yet only assisted by the husband who is just as old as her.

This afternoon, my inpatient was not in the mood to cooperate with his exercises. The caregiver told him in the morning that his daughter, a practicing doctor in the neighboring city was in town and might visit him. Unfortunately, she didn't come to see him and mind you it has been five years that she haven't visited them, in fact it's just a 2-hour drive away from Iligan City. Obviously, the father was upset and of course I can't help to feel bad for him. Sometimes, our financial support isn't enough, a little of our time might be a great help emotionally and psychologically for this sick and frail loved one.

"The best use of life is love. The best expression of love is time." - Rick Warren

As someone who can see the need, we just have to walk an extra mile for these patients who badly needed a "family," not by blood but through kindness and love.

My last words for tonight is not mine,

“Honor your father and your mother, so that you may live long in the land the LORD your God is giving you." - Exodus 20:12

Spread the love, in your family first.


Thanks for reading!


All photos from Pixabay (free to use images)

All Original Content (unless specified otherwise)

03/15/2022

©️ LykeLyca


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Avatar for LykeLyca
2 years ago
Topics: Society

Comments

There are many children who apparently do not love their parents, it is unfortunate, because our parents have done everything for us and have sacrificed throughout their lives so that we as children are well and enjoy good health, it is sad to see that there are children with very good jobs who do not care about their parents, maybe they have a lot of money and a good job, but I feel that they do not have a good heart, because if they had it they would help their parents.

$ 0.00
1 year ago

It is unfortunate to hear stories like this, here there are also many elderly people who suffer on the streets, they have no one to look after them.

$ 0.00
2 years ago

this is the reality sis... we can't judge the children, we can't judge the parents as well, we only know the surface... as for us, these situations are visible in our time for us to reflect and see what we are doing for our parents.

indeed, financial support is not enough. At the end of the day, our children are not ours to control, we are merely caretakers, soon, they'll leave us and we can only hope for them to visit, give us attention but not expect too much because worldly promises will surely break our hearts.

We can only hope that in the afterlife, we will see each other.

$ 0.01
2 years ago

Sad reality jud sis. And, yes seeing each other in the afterlife is all that matters.

$ 0.00
2 years ago

yes sis

$ 0.00
2 years ago

My heart breaks reading this :(

$ 0.01
2 years ago

yes madam, nasasaktan ako para sa ibang patients ko...

$ 0.00
2 years ago

Truly heartbreaking to see children who treats their parents like that. They might have their reasons but for me, family should come first..

$ 0.01
2 years ago

We all have reasons indeed, if we can't forget the pain we should at least forgive them on their time of reckoning.

$ 0.00
2 years ago

It's really sad that some people can't take care of their loved ones and then feel guilty in the end when it's too late.

$ 0.01
2 years ago

Ayy totoo yan...

$ 0.00
2 years ago

Ganun kasi minsan e dami regrets pag wala n un tao.

$ 0.00
2 years ago

I have been born to a family with a father who has made us felt emotionally damaged all these years, he does not consider the words that comes from his mouth, however I really commend my siblings because they are still kind to our father despite all of our experiences in life.

$ 0.01
2 years ago

When our parents get old and sick, the only best thing we can do for them is to forgive, show some love might be their last.

$ 0.00
2 years ago

The parents mistreating children ratio is very low than the children treating parents. I personally have seen so many families while growing up as a kid . I thought back then these old people of my grandparents age are so fun to be with but why their adult kids leave them alone. I will never settle for something like that and wish that I never have to go away from my family. Also there maybe a hidden conflict story between the parents and children which we don't know maybe the case for behaviours like this but majority of them are for no reason.

$ 0.01
2 years ago

It's sad not to forgive our parents when they're old and sick, we might only have days to see them.

$ 0.00
2 years ago

I have known parents who behaved very badly with their children. They kicked them out of the house, took away any help and just when they are old they just say that their children abandoned them and it turns out that they have been alone for more than 50 years but they don't tell the whole story.

$ 0.01
2 years ago

Well, that's an interesting case too my friend. We can't blame the children indeed.

$ 0.00
2 years ago

that is the case, that we only heard the older man say and complain that he was abandoned. Before judging I want to hear another version of why that man is lonely.

$ 0.00
2 years ago

Grabe ang sakit nito maam Lyca. Agree ako ma'am Lyca na hindi guarantee na meron kang children merong mag aalaga sayo lalo na sa pagtanda. May alam din akong ganito ma'am Lyca tas mapapatanong na lang bat nakaya gawin yung ng mga anak sa parents nila. Sobrang napakalaking question talaga ma'am Lyca.

$ 0.01
2 years ago

Yah mao pud na akong na huna hunaan pero for my patient na halos professionals na mga anak niya,I'm sure good provider pud ilang parents as they grow up bisan kana nlng unta huna-hunaon sa mga anak.

$ 0.00
2 years ago

Mao gayud ma'am Lyca pero ang uban dili gayud mag pakabana maam. Malooy ka nalang sa uban na mga parents.

$ 0.00
2 years ago

Nakakalungkot naman yan, yan din ang isa pang ano ng oldies pagdating ng panahon na matanda na sila re. Kahiy may anak kapa, pag nakahanap na ng kanya kanyang buhay maiiwanan din sila na mag isa. Support, yun lang ang maibibigya nila. How about their presence? Well it's not really their responsibility, sabihin na ganon nga pero kahit manlang sana oncr a week magkaroon ng bonding time diba. Kaya ako ayaw kong tumanda ee. I mean, I want nto die at y 50.

$ 0.01
2 years ago

Kahit once a year na lang sis, or di kaya kahit tawag nlng... masakit talaga para sa magulang..

$ 0.00
2 years ago

Yan sana ano, ano naman kasing gagawin ng mga oldies sa pera diba. Buti mo sana if makakagala pa sila nag isa. Sana manlang talaga tsk

$ 0.00
2 years ago

Kahit anong effort, support at sacrifices talaga ang bigay ng isang magulang sa mga anak nila may mga anak pa rin talaga na nakakalimut magpasalamat manlang o bigyan atensyon ang magulang nila kapag nagkaroon na ng trabaho

$ 0.01
2 years ago

If walang pera kahit sa oras man lang dba, at if may pera kahit mn lang 5 mins sana magpakita sa mga magulang kahit hi o hello mn lang... haayyyss kawawa mga matatanda...

$ 0.00
2 years ago

Totoo po di man talaga pati pera ang hinihingi ng mga magulang kung hindi kalinga sa mga anak nila

$ 0.00
2 years ago

Though my parents weren't that good to me during my childhood days, they are still my parents. So if I could help them in any way, I still contribute and that made a way for us to reconcile.

$ 0.01
2 years ago

That's really true, and thank you for looking back at them..

$ 0.00
2 years ago

May kilala din akong mga anak na ganyan sa parents nila. Like wala silang pake. Never man lang nilang naisip how their parents sacrificed and worked hard to raise them. So sad but they really exist.

$ 0.01
2 years ago

Dba grabe kahit na sabihin natin sobra din mag disiplina parents nila dati pero ung sacrifice nila para mapaaral ka hindi biro un, kahit un nlng isipin nila.

$ 0.00
2 years ago

It sad that they don't get cared for when they needed assistance... I pray we'd have the heart to assist them not with money but by our presence.

$ 0.00
2 years ago

It sad that they don't get cared for when they needed assistance... I pray we'd have the heart to assist them not with money but by our presence.

$ 0.01
2 years ago

All I can do is to pray for them indeed.

$ 0.00
2 years ago

There is lot of people who are earn well but not take care their parents. There is many people who are earn well and given parents money but not not given time for them.It's the reality.

$ 0.01
2 years ago

True. We can't give everything but at least we should try.

$ 0.00
2 years ago