“Integrity is doing the right thing, even when no one is watching.” - C.S. Lewis
I have this quote posted recently in noise.cash, integrity bothers my mind while I was on my way home from work.
I wonder, where is integrity when all that is left is drudgery, hardship, and tribulation. When no one checks on your mistakes, and no one acknowledges your success, when you’ll just have to do your thing on your own, can you remain honest and truthful till the end?
This evening, my memory takes me to this patient that I have been seeing for some time. I was her Physical Therapist when she got multiple fractures due to a vehicular accident. She recovered from that ordeal with me, however, she got a stroke a few months after that, so it was a never ending Physical Therapy sessions for her.
Her dilemma was overwhelming. When she got a stroke and could no longer move around, being in bed all day and having to rely on her husband’s help, I know how depressing it was, I can feel it and I saw her cry sometimes.
Unfortunately, her suffering didn’t end there. The most painful of it all was when her husband abandoned her, took her retirement money that she thought was enough for her treatments and medications.
The husband didn’t hire a caregiver for her, he would constantly assure her that he can do it. Helped her in taking a bath, changing diapers, cooking, and feeding her, it’s a cycle every single day. Anyone would understand all that is drudgery in the long run. So, anyone should hold on, but for how long?
After six months, the husband stopped PT sessions for her wife saying that they’ll be going to Manila and will be living with their son. All along, I really thought that they did.
A couple months after, I received the heartbreaking news that the wife died.
At the funeral, I found out that they didn’t leave for Manila, and a month after she stopped Physical Therapy, her husband took the money she got after retirement being a Public School Teacher. However, before that, she endured being left at home sometimes with no food, and diapers left unchanged. Her co-teacher once visited her and contacted a relative’s househelp to visit her once a day during daytime when the husband isn’t around, unfortunately there are times that she’s alone at night too.
While listening on how she went through, I felt like I had a lump in my throat holding back my tears. She must’ve held on for so long with all the pain and frustrations on her deathbed.
In sickness and in health… Sometimes, it can be a lie.
This is a sad reality, no one is sticking around when the other gets sick, and when life gets tough. Our chances of finding integrity in situations like this can be a shot in the dark.
Nothing is certain, even the weather and love.
Why out of the blue this story bugs me? Because, just this afternoon, I have heard the husband passed away in their home, in the room his wife died.
I hope he finds forgiveness from his past mistakes, from life that might've unfolded differently, and the regrets that might've haunted him till the very end.
Right now, I am listening to this song from Ben & Ben "Leaves," made me realize that, perhaps patience just fell short in sustaining love and truthfulness. And maybe, all will be all right in time, that is if there is still time.
What a melancholic Saturday night, and listening to this song makes me want to sigh...
Have an amazing weekend everyone!
Photos by me. First posted on Flickr. All Rights Reserved.
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11/13/2021
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huhhuhuh...I felt sad for the wife..and I kept on imagining the struggles she had to endure... I also felt bad for the husband , maybe he felt tired and all and only want to rest but then it's all too late