Hello People!
Good day to you all, hope you're doing good?
Monday has been tough for me that's why you haven't seen me around, I've been battling with stubborn catarrh (running noise) and I took medicine to counter it but you know the end product... drowsiness. I'll try my best to cover up the space I've missed.
Thank you sponsors ✌️My today's blog is all about a young guy that was ready to do all manners of things just to succeed in life.
The story is fictional. Read and laugh along🙌
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Reminiscing on the paths have toured in life, I remembered an event that occurred in the year 2016.
I have guys who are making it real big in yahoo(fraud) and I joined them but mine refused to be successful. I was spending money on airtime, data and as well was having sleepless nights, there were nights I didn't sleep at all.
There is this scenerio where I met two women online, one was like our Alison madueke to USA and the other one was a manager of Honda group of companies.
These women are very smart and they can even tell from your typing the country you came from.
My guys suggested to use vodoo powers
One of my friends told me, that there is this baba that all you need to bring is your hard earned N15,000(about $30) that you labored for, he said he could have given it to me but it has to be my sweat. I was ready to follow him to see the BABA, but I had no dime on me, no job, nothing nothing so I couldn't meet up with the money so I let it slide.
So there is this my landlord's son that we happened to be age mates. I told him, then he took me to another BABA in a nearby city. When we got there, he said we should go to Yoruba Road and get a very stubborn catfish and bring it alive to him. We did as he asked, he collected N5,000($10) for work and told us to come back on the Friday, we went there on a Tuesday.
I couldn't sleep well, I was imagining the Lexus or Venza I was going to buy after billing these women, same goes for my friend.. We've already spent 20million of the money we haven't collected hahah🤣🤣. We will first lodge in a 5 star hotel, eat all the meats in this world (yeah I love meat so much) and look for somebody's daughter to spoil.
My mind was racing against time and it even seems Friday will never come because the days began to slow down. 4-5pm will seem like 2months, I couldn't sleep well but finally, Friday came.
Friday came
Before we gave him the money and the fish, I had gone to print both their pictures. so stubborn fish, N5,000 and pictures were what we are to give him and least I forget, the BABA is learned, he usually show his certificates to his clients to gaurantee them that he's not local and for sure that boosted our confidence in him.
I called him very early on Friday and he told us to come by twelve noon. We got there around 10:30am and hung around till 12noon. We went in to meet him exactly 12noon and he was like, "una blood dey hot o"(you guys are desperate oo), I said baba, you won't understand.
He gave me this calabash wrapped in thorough white wool so whatever is inside the calabash is not visible. The instruction was, go to Waterview side and bury the calabash. Not inside water but atleast where water can touch it occasionally and that on the second day at around 12pm, I should bill my clients.
I have done yahoo for almost 2years though ON & OFF and I have never collected a dime from it so I was already giving up when this my friend brought the idea of visiting this BABA to me.
When I got home, I was laughing sheepishly and my babe was wondering what was going on. Then, I was living in a "face me I face you apartment" so my plan was, Get a three bedroom apartment, furnish it, get 65inch led TV, a washing machine, soundbar, dstv explora, gas cooker, oven, etc. Mind you, I had gone to price all these things🤦🤦, I even planned a 5kva solar system.
Around 1pm the second day, I billed my clients and the result was devastating, I almost collapsed.
The Honda woman told me, "I know you are a Nigerian scammer, I kept you till this time because I like the way you talk and being a lonely woman, I like the way you always keep me company, It keeps me busy. Bye bye scammer and please get something doing. The money you aimed to get from me is my sweat so sorry, can't give you my sweat".
The Alison madueke type woman wasted no time, even for the fact that I used a VPN and all, she already has my picture, my real name, my address, Infact almost everything about me. She said, "I really wanna go deep with you though I suspect you to be a scammer but there is something about you I like so I paid someone to dig into you using your IP and so many factors".
I just jejely called my friend and handed him the phone, my liver almost failed me, my BP was extremely high, my legs were shaking, I couldn't walk straight anymore, my eyes were darkened so I couldn't explain anything so I just handed him the phone.
I became frustrated with the fact of things have planned, even the way I have been carrying myself on the street cussioned with the fact that the car dealer I met and gave hope lives very close to me and I always tell him, don't worry next week we gonna ball hard. All these gave birth to the BLOOD MONEY SAGA.
The biggest shock
And let me shock you, we went back to where we buried the Calabash, opened the calabash, no fish, no picture only cow dung and sand. Baba used our fish for peppersoup🤣🤣🤣.
The story continues...
Lead image source: Freepik
Thank you for reading
30th May 2022
Lol what a bummer!