Hide until I Could
Date: February 27, 2022Blessed Sunday read.cash citizen❣️ I am literally a flash today as I woke up at 7:36 am as what Mama said when I asked the time. Knowing the time, I am totally late for the service and I decided not to attend the mass and go back to sleep. I really need to fall asleep at 2 in the morning today. However, before coming back into dreamland my cousin arrived to ask if I was at the church already and Mama woke me up again and told me to prepare and dress up as my cousin waits for me. Imagine, taking a bath for 5 minutes and dressing up and mixing myself for another 5 minutes. In 10 minutes, I am ready to go and walk like a zombie. Thank God, I never felt sleepy during the service but in our department I really felt my head and eyes shut down any minute. Still I survived and was knocked out after I took my meal.
Mr. Sunny was not in the mood to show up to witness and expose his brightening and shimmering hotness. These past few days I've noticed the rainy and gloomy weather together with a cold breeze which I assume is low pressure. Together with it, yesterday afternoon an earthquake happened at the magnitude of 5.3 at Davao Occidental according to NDRRMC. Thank God no damage has been reported.
The market also has a gloomy environment which I seldomly visit nor monitor ang sakit sa puso when I see red, red and more red. Even my tokens were in the dipped situation, especially the MILK token which I am eyeing above all but sadly the price breaks my heart still having faith for more MILK and the pump moments.
Honestly, I've observed when I was at the moment of breaking down and loneliness the weather dwells in me like saying "let me cry to ease your pain". Many times when I am at the peak of crying the raindrops also fall which makes me cry for more. One thing about me, I am really softhearted and it's easy to cry even when I am watching or reading a touching moment when my tears fall. Being like this sometimes makes me weak as I can't speak up and dep3nf myself and there are times it makes me strong by letting my tears speak to my feelings and emotions but afterwards I felt stronger and ready to face the world again.
I am very transparent on this platform, especially expressing my love to Mama, as I always say "I could trade everything for her '' just to protect her at all cost. In spite of our bond and close relationship I always make sure she will not know any breaking moment of my life. It seems impossible but I made it through the years for the reason I can't afford to see her tears. No matter how I hide it she can still figure it out and feel it because she is my mother. I believe all mothers have this instinct that their child has, considering that they carried us for nine months, which creates an unbreakable connection. I didn't tell her but her actions say that she's with me and I am not alone in my battle by staying with me late at night.
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Langga pray always. I understand what you feel right now. 🥺 Sometimes ganyan din ako then iniiyak ko lang para mapalabas then mag pipray ako at after nun okay na ako. God is with us Langga. He will listen our prayers always. 🙏 Be brave Langga. Ma okay lang ang lahat. 🙏