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Cancer-Crabby; Wallflower; The Shrinking Violet; Taciturn
1 month ago
Have you been into a serious relationship? How did it go for you? Did you guys end up with each other or did you guys broke up and moved on to another?
We all have different ways how we express our love to a person. A relationship always leads to misunderstanding when one can't keep up or meet the expectations with one's love language.
Sometimes, one gets judged by the people around them because he/she is not expressive at all with regards to his/her relationship in public so it appears that the relationship is only one-sided. When in fact, his/her love language is acts of service or receiving gifts. People are too quick to conclude certain situations without knowing the real story behind them.
I just recently read a book about the Five Types of Love Languages by Dr. Gary Chapman, an author, and a counselor. So I thought of sharing this with you and find out what type is yours.
This type of love language is mostly expressed by words. Writing a love letter or a cute long note to your partner would mean so much to the other. They will feel most valued and loved when one frequently assures their love even in just ordinary days.
I'm proud of you or I appreciate you.
These simple words of encouragement would make someone feel so "kilig" when you assure them with so much appreciation. A simple compliment like appreciating his/her hair, smile, overall get-up would make their day already.
Pointing out the things they do well would make them feel loved and encourage them to do more for your appreciation.
This love language is usually misinterpreted as sex. This doesn't always talk about bedrooms only. It has a deeper meaning that one would appreciate more if his/her partner expresses the love through hugging, kissing, holding hands, or even a simple tap in the back. Physical affection is what they appreciate the most.
An ideal date for someone whose love language is physical touch is to watch one's favorite movie and just cuddle on the couch. Although you would expect something more to happen after getting steamy. Yay!
People who have this type of love language express themselves through spending good quality time together. If a couple spends quality time together, I believe the other 4 love languages will follow through.
When one gives you their time and undivided attention, it's more than just spending time with each other. It's about putting down the cellphone, listening actively, and making eye contact.
As they say, you are physically present but mentally absent. I believe that paying attention to your partner while spending time with them is the sweetest. It goes to show how sincere and sure you are to them.
With this type of love language, one appreciates it more if you offer them your service. You do things that would make them feel less burdened. The little acts of service you do give them the affirmation that you really love them. Cooking breakfast for you, fetching you at work, construct a cabinet for the bedroom. These are some examples of acts of service.
I believe this mostly applies to our parents when they get older. Growing up, I could sense that the words of affirmation, physical touch, and quality time were slowly fading out but the acts of service remain.
They divide the household chores to distribute the work and make one feel less burdened and tired.
People would often label this love language as materialism. However, giving gifts doesn't only limit to make the other person happy. It's more than just a gift. As they say, it's the thought that counts. They think about you while looking for something to give you.
Something that symbolizes the love that person has put into it. It also means that you truly know the person well. You know the things they like and don't like.
If someone's love language is receiving gifts, it will surely create a big impact on them as they value the gift more because of what you did.
So what is your love language? I have taken a test to know what type of love language dominates me. Click the link to check yours:
As you can see, I'm a little bit of everything except for receiving gifts. The first four love languages are pretty much divided and balanced. Receiving gifts is not really my thing. I would appreciate someone who gives me a gift but I don't really look forward to it.
My dominant love language is Words of Affirmation.
Even if we are already almost 4 years of being in a long-distance relationship, we make sure that the communication does not miss a day. A simple good morning, I love you and good night would suffice.
It's about giving each other's assurance that we are still here for each other even if we are miles apart. Open communication is the total key.