Have You Ever Been Into A "Situationship" ?

I'm pretty sure some of you guys have ever been into this. What is "situationship" to begin with?

By google definition, situationship is an undefined romantic relationship. It is an undefined romantic relationship that exists somewhere in between a casual hookup and a committed relationship.

In other words, it is a "no label" relationship or in Filipino term, "walang label".

So, have you ever been into this? I gotta share my story about this and it just happened recently so it's still fresh and somehow, it still hurts me from time to time.

There's this guy whom I met online 2 months ago. Actually, I met him through his colleague whom I met online as well through a Facebook advertisement from our video. We promoted our videos on fb and he chatted me. These guys are seamen based in Canada. They work in a mining company near the port.

From there, he introduced himself saying he liked the song and I caught his attention. Such a player. We chatted for weeks, I kinda developed a crush on him somehow because of his charisma then another guy (my situationship) came into the picture and introduced himself, his name was Jake, as the colleague of Bull (the guy who chatted me first).

He said, he got curious of who's the singer behind that audio he heard from Bull's phone. When he chatted me the first time, I even asked him if he noticed me via cashrain. That was the time I kept on promoting our videos on cashrain via Twitter.

He then told me that he heard me singing on Bull's phone and he asked for my Facebook name and from there, he chatted me. I ain't the snub type who ignores someone who chats me especially if you're not I know of.

So we had conversations along the way, the exchange was smooth. Everything was fun. Getting to know stage is surely exciting, I should say. I found out that Jake was into music as well. He's a member of the band on guitars. He also sings a little. We shared a lot of common traits & interests, so no doubt, we felt that connection.

Our first phone talk

He suggested that we should talk for us to get to know better. Do you agree that you can somehow get a hint of someone's personality when they talk? But again, not all the time because some are just too good in deceiving people through talking.

But on his case, I felt he really was a nice person. He's sincere, he's also introverted, he's had a history of depression as well, he catches my type of humor. If you remember not long ago, I published an article about "My Non-Sexual Turn On", it was mainly about him. He has almost everything on the list and that's why I have developed feelings towards him. I felt we are building something and it's special.

The situationship has gone shaky

Since his nature of work is very physical demanding, he rarely gets time to use his phone and go online. He rarely gets enough sleep as well so whenever he has time, he maximizes that to sleep.

That's when the talking stage started to slow down. He disappears for days and apologize to me for not reaching out. I wonder why it's so hard for him to chat me when it only takes seconds to go online and update what's going on.

I am not really demanding his time. I actually respect it but I just wanna know how he's doing if he's safe or he's eating well. I can't really do it because we haven't established a formal relationship yet. We're still on a situationship. Of course, I found him important to my life already but the way he's showing me these behaviors says otherwise to me.

On February 14, Valentines Day

With our time zone difference, it's hard to catch and maintain communication. He showed up again after disappearing for a week. As gullible as I am, I welcomed he back.

He explained his disappearance was about him taking his time to think things over. He just wanna make sure about his feelings towards me and take things slow. He thought he was the only one developing that feeling so I reassured him that it's not the case.

And, he ghosted me.

I thought everything was settled already. We have made things clear to take the situation slowly but surely. Everything went out fine though. This was his last chat:

And he never chatted me anymore. It's been over a month now and he hasn't seen my messages. Maybe he uninstalled Facebook. I chatted Bull and asked what happened to Jake, he replied that he's doing well and he'll send my regards to him but after that, he deactivated his account.

To my suspicion, which I had some during the early stage of talking but I shrugged it off because I chose to trust him and gave the situationship a chance to take me where it'll be, Bull and Jake are the same person chatting me. Although they showed me pictures of them in their workplace to make it believable.

I was so into that idea of falling in love into someone whom I consider the right one for me because he has the traits I'm looking for a guy but the stupid thing that happened is that, I ignored the red flag and still trusted the situation.

So I was left hanging thinking what went wrong. Upon analyzing, maybe Jake felt overwhelmed and got scared of the commitment he'll be in? Maybe he felt a huge responsibility to himself carrying the feelings I have for him and when he found it overwhelming, he chose to run away.

I went through the stage of grief again. It hurt like I was in a breakup but it wasn't. Though, I am fine now. I have already moved on. It took me a little less a month only to be okay. The thing about me is that, I only share stuff about me when it's done. When I have already went through that situation. That's when I'm most comfortable at sharing things to people. Is it just me?

So, have you been into a situationship? Share your story and comment down below.

Thanks for reading.

Keep safe everyone!