Health is Wealth: Priorities
When I was surfing here in read.cash, I've seen and read an article about taking care of our health and how it is important, it was entitled **Be Careful with your Health**. This said article were published by one of the great writer here in read.cash @Ruffa. I am a fan of her articles, especially her articles about some sad short stories which excites me every time I read it. Then, when I've read this article of hers about health, it gives me idea also on what to write because I myself have an unhealthy lifestyle nowadays. https://read.cash/@Ruffa/be-careful-with-your-health-9cf30270
**So, I wanted to share also my experiences regarding health issues and to give some realizations about it.**
All of us knew that, **HEALTH is very important.** But sometimes, due to our willingness and eagerness to earn money and even to earn a lot more we tend to forget how to value our health and how to live in a healthy lifestyle.
I myself, when I was not yet working online I always sleeps early like at 7PM I'm already sleeping because I had nothing to do also. There's no internet in my area when I was still living with my parents which means I'm not distracted to cellphones where in fact before I'm just using my cellphone often or there is also a day that I'm not even using my phone or even looked at it because of course there is no internet so I don't have anything to do with my phone since I can't browse my social medias. That is why, before, I always have 7 hours to 8 hours of sleep everyday and even beyond which is a very healthy way of sleeping since our body needs at least 7 to 8 hours of sleep. But, this routine of mine change when I moved already to my partner's town especially when I already started to work online.
***March 27, 2021***
This is the day that I already started to teach online to a particular ESL company. Because of this pandemic, I don't have any choice on how I can earn money but to do some homebased works. Since, for the meantime I'm still on the process of my application in DepEd. So for me to be able to raise my kid and can provide his needs I must take this kind of work since this is the only work also that is safe from getting infected from the spreading virus. I have a partner, yes, but he's still a student a 3rd year student to be exact and also doing his online classes that is why I do the work since I already finished my studies and had a licensed too.
***So, get back with the topic...***
In my first two weeks of teaching, my schedule were very tiring the fact that on weekdays I worked 6 hours straight in the evening from **6PM to 12 midnight** since that was the peak hours of my students during weekdays ***(by the way my students were Chinese, and that is the peak hours in China)***. Then, on weekends, the peak hours is from **8AM until 12 midnight** and within that two weeks I plotted 12-13 hours every weekend. That time I realized how tiring it is especially the fact that I was also fully booked that time and it was already the starting point that I already had hard time accumulating 7 hours of sleep knowing my schedule. Well, I am the one who chooses my schedule since in my company we tutors were given opportunity to plot our own schedules in whatever time we want. But since I was very overwhelmed that I always got fully booked that is why I opened many slots within that 2 weeks of course to earn a lot more for my son's daily needs. For me also to help my family financially even just for a little amount at least I could give them some too.
***April 27, 2021***
My first month of teaching online. This time I already adjusted my time in plotting schedules during weekdays because I already felt sleepy at 10PM that is why I just end my class at 10pm so that I can sleep after that also. But this seems not helping also, because after 10pm I should have to go to sleep already but the truth is I can only sleep at 12 midnight or at 1 am already. Why? It's because after my classes, after I faced for almost 5 hours in my computer I'm also browsing again in noise cash with my cellphone and making drafts on my articles here in read.cash. These were the reasons that even I already adjusted my class schedules I still sleeps at 12 and even beyond that which already unhealthy. I always thought that I need to do this because I wanted to earn more. I need to work harder to the point that I don't even care to my health already. By this times, I already felt dizzy, I always felt the headaches but I just ignores it since I can still endure it too.
***Third week of May 2021***
I can't remember the specific date but it was 3rd week of May. After I had my class that time, it was 10:30 pm I shut down my computer and after that I'm still holding my phone and didn't sleep directly since I'm still browsing my noise cash. It was already 12 midnight that I stopped browsing with my phone and when I already attempted to go to sleep I felt very dizzy as if the room were circling and felt my head aching and felt some butterflies in my forehead. It takes long, the dizziness takes long until I vomited. I vomits many times up until there were no food left to be circulated in my tummy. Because of that I felt dehydrated, I almost lost my state that time even my partner gat panicked too. He massage my hands, my forehead , my head, up until I got okay. My dizziness was still there, but I really tried to go to sleep so that I can already rest. So, I forced myself to go to sleep even if when I laid down my head stills trembling up until I got to sleep. When I woke up that morning, I somehow felt okay but still up until now when I faced my computer for a long time I just felt my heads aching. What I did, is just closed my eyes and then worked again. Up until now it is still hard for me to have 7 hours of sleep because even if I wanted to get up by 8am to 9am, my son will just woke me up because he also wakes up early sometime 4am my son is already awake. So I had no choice but to get up early too. It was rare that I can get up at 8am, that is, if my son won't wakes up too early.
***~ Realizations ~***
When I read the article of @Ruffa, I realized one thing. That is, **to care of our health before anything worst will happen.** Because we don' t know, if we just live life unhealthy and something will happen to us unexpectedly ***(wag naman sana)***, the first question that comes to my mind is that, "WHAT WILL HAPPEN TO MY SON?", "WHAT WOULD MY FAMILY FELT IF EVER?" . . .
That is why, for my situation not to get worst I really tried my best now to rest and to sleep up to 7 hours which is for me very hard to do for now. But I'll try to change my routines and I know eventually I can manage my time already. For now, I still need to adjust to it. **This is really a matter of DISCIPLINING OURSELVES.**
Well, it's not bad to be workaholic in term or to be hardworking but in line with that we always makes our **HEALTH A PRIORITY** because this is the only asset we had in ourselves.
That is why, the saying goes **"HEALTH IS WEALTH".**
Hopefully, you'll get insights in this article. Happy reading!!!
@Janz
I just wanted to thanks again my sponsors @Eybyoung @Eunoia @Cineholic and @nheng1118 for supporting my articles.
Also to @immaryandmerry @LykeLyca @Willtravis for upvoting my previous articles. My heart warming thanks to all you.
**You may checked also my previous articles:**
~ **Losing Parents: Grief and Loss** https://read.cash/@Janz/losing-parents-grief-and-loss-2ac48239
~ **When I thought I'm Lost** https://read.cash/@Janz/when-i-thought-im-lost-eb832b43
~ **The Impact of Social Medias nowadays...** https://read.cash/@Janz/the-impact-of-social-medias-nowadays-62c64af5
~ **A Warrior Baby** https://read.cash/@Janz/a-warrior-baby-006c7474
~ **The Reality Behind an Online Teacher** https://read.cash/@Janz/the-reality-behind-an-online-teacher-8739cc45
~ **I hide my Pain with a Smile** https://read.cash/@Janz/i-hide-my-pain-with-a-smile-4104ca32
Losing Parents: Grief and Loss
I wanted to express my freedom of writing this article into TagLish (Tagalog-English) as my response to @Zhyne06 challenge in her article **Freedom to express what you feel.** https://read.cash/@Zhyne06/freedom-to-express-what-you-feel-516a9336
But this freedom of expressing self is what I wanted to do in this article which I will try to express my thoughts in TagLish. Hopefully, you will bare with me by this.
**DISCLAIMER:** This article is not really my experienced, this is my partner's experienced when he loses his parents in a consecutive months last 2017. I asked his permission and he also allows me to share in this platform his experienced.
***So, to start with......***
Ito na susubukan ko nang mag TagLish....
Nagkakakilala kami ng partner ko ngayon nung nasa 3rd year college ako at siya nasa 1st year college pa kasi nag shift siya ng kurso that time kaya 1st year pa siya nun. Naging magka boardmate kami kasi nung 3rd year college ko may compulsory summer classes kami nun, kaya't napilitan akong mag boarding house nalang imbis na everyday ako uuwi sa amin para naman makatipid din sa pamasahe ko araw-araw. Nung nag start na ang opening classes sa school, of course expected ko na dadami kami sa boarding house kasi balik classes na, during that summer tatlo lang kaming nag occupy sa boardinghouse kami ni gurl @Zhyne06 at yung isa is instructor namin sa school, actually math instructor din namin ni gurl kasi Math majors kami eh. And,yes the start of classes, marami na kami sa boarding house at ka boardmate ko pala ang magiging partner ko. At dito kami nagkakilala, pero ma tagal tagal pa bago naging kami talaga. ***(I will just make article about us, charot)***
Anyways, to make this short kasi pag itutuloy ko kwento namin baka maging 1 hour plus na reading time nito. Gagawan ko na lang ng ibang article kasi marami din kaming pagsubok na magjowa. (jems) Diba gurl @Zhyne06 witnessed ka. (haha)
Kaya ayun, nung naging kami doon ko pa lang nalaman na ulila na pala siya, at magkasunod palang nawala ang nanay at tatay niya within a year at siya at kanyang dalawang kapatid na lang ang nandyan. Syempre, nung naging kami, ***of course we open up each others stories***, kaya noong kinuwento niya sa aking yung storya na patungkol sa kanyang nararamdaman nung magkasunod kinuha sa kanila ang magulang nila batid ko talaga sa kanyang mukha at mata na labis siyang nangungulila sa mga ito. Minsan nga naging ***teary-eyed*** pa siya pero hindi niya lang pinapahalata sa akin, pa simpleng smile lang siya para hindi talaga tumulo luha niya pero syempre alam ko kahit di ako ang nasa sitwasyon alam kung sobrang sakit ang mawalan ng magulang at magkasunod pang mawawala. At itong partner ko siya lang naman yung nakakatandang kapatid sa kanilang tatlo kaya nasa kanya ngayon ang responsibilid na maging tatay at nanay sa kapatid niya.
Katunayang nga ay gumawa siya rito ng article, that was already 2 months ago kasi ngayon hindi na siya active rito. Unang article na na published niya rito ay patungkol sa kanyang magulang entitled **Ama, Ina, sa inyo ako'y nangungulila...** https://read.cash/@Junix/ama-ina-sa-inyo-akoy-nangungulila-9de6b637
*At ito yung nakasulat sa article niyang* ***Ama, Ina, sa inyo ako'y nangungulila...*** ***(Credits to*** @Junix *)* https://read.cash/@Junix/ama-ina-sa-inyo-akoy-nangungulila-9de6b637
`Ama at Ina, sila ang dalawang tao na mayroon ka, taga payo mo upang ika'y maging mabuting tao, taga bigay nang iyong gusto, ang taong gagawin lahat maibigay lang ang nararapat para sa sayo at higit sa lahat, ang taong minsan nang sinuway mo. Sa gitna nang kasiyahang ibinigay nila sayo, minsan mo na rin bang naisip Kung paano pag sila ay na wala sayo? Kaya mo na bang tumayo gamit ang sariling mga paa mo? Paano Kung sila ay kunin sayo nang dakilang taga pag-likha nang ating mundo? Kakayanin mo ba ito?`
`Alam ba ninyo na ang Araw ay mahigit 148.6 milyon kilometro ang layo nito sa planetang Earth 🌍. At ang liwanag na ibinibigay nito ay Aabot ng 8 minuto bago makarating sa planetang Earth. Kapag ang Araw mismo ang sumabog at nasira, Hindi mo ito malalaman kaagad. 8 minuto pa ang lilipas bago magdilim ng kusa mundo. Kagaya ko, August 2017 nang mamatay ang aking ina at Sept. 2017 sumunod ang aking Ama. Ang pagkawala nila ay d ko gaanong maramdaman sapagkat, ang akala ko ay isang panaginip lang at ako'y nag hahangad na magising sa panaginip na iyon. Lumipas ang mga taon unti-unti ko nang nararamdaman Ang sakit ng pagkawala nila at Hindi ko na sila makikita pa, tatayo at titindig gamit ang aking sariling mga paa. Tatanggapin at yayakapin ang na katotohanang, ako'y Wala nang Ama't Ina. Paano ko ba masasabi sa Kanila na "Ama, Ina, sa inyo ako'y nangungulila" na.`
Alam niyo ba, nang sinulat niya ang article na yan, sobrang tagal niyang pinag isipan at natapos yan at ng na published na niya yan, at binasa ko ang akala is mataas ang sinulat niya kasi matagal siyang natapos. Dito ko napagtanto na sobrang hirap ang mawalan ng magulang knowing that hindi pa masyadon matanda ang magulang niya noong mawala ang mga ito. Hinayaan ko nga lang, hindi ko muna kinukulit kasi alam kong para sa kanya mahirap itong sinulat niya at talagang tagos hanggang "bone marrow". Nung nabasa ko ito, talagang sumikip din yung dibdib ko kasi "I really felt him" kaya't niyakap ko na lang siya pagkatapos niya itong mai publish kasi ***that is the only way I can gave him to hug him*** kasi batid ko yung pain niya ehh, kahit nung time na nawala parents niya hindi pa ako yung karamay niya. Sayang nga at hindi ko naabutan ang parents niya at hindi nila naabutan ang "grandson" sana nila.
Sabi niya pa nga, sobrang sakit daw kasi magkasunod kinuha, Una yung nanay niya tapos the next month naman sumunod tatay niya. At unexpected and mga pangyayari spagkat't hindi niya raw ito ineexpect. Ito nga rin ang rason kung bakit nag shift siya ng kurso kasi hindi siya nakapasa sa 3rd year sana na level kasi may mga sabjek siyang hindi napasa. Napariwara siya sa pag aaral noon, at nung nagkakilala kami dun lang siya unti-unting umaalis sa bisyo niya. Kasi ayon sa kanya ang pag iinom daw medyo naging way niya para mailibang niya ang sarili niya and nalimutan ang sakit ng pagkamatay ng magulang which also he thought na tama. Nung naging kami, pinakita niya sa akin na may bisyo siya like smoking, pero minsan lang siya uminom nun noong kami na, yung pagsisigarilyo lang yung medyo hindi niya mawala wala that time. Pero, I told him na ayaw ko sa mga ganyang vices kasi ang usok niya ay isa sa mga maka pag trigger ng allergy ko. Well, I was happy kasi matagal na siyang hindi nagsisigarilyo at hindi umiinom up until now. ***I just felt he changed himself because of me and of course to our little one.*** Dapat lang naman kasi that is what a responsible dad is. Palagi ko siyang ni reremind nun na, I hate vices specially smoking, at nakikinig naman unti unti niyang binabawasan ang pagsisigarilyo up until natigil na niya ito.
Well, and masasabi ko lang... hindi madali ang mawalan lalo na kung mga magulang mo pa at hindi mo ini expect na mangyari iyon that time in same year. Ako nga na wala sa sitwasyon sobrang nasaktan, paano pa kaya ang nasa ganyang sitwasyon talaga just like sa partner ko. Mahirap siguro, hindi pala siguro, Mahirap talaga.
Sa ngayon nga hindi maiiwasan na mababanggit niya ang mga memories nila ng magulang niya sa akin, pinakikinggan ko lang siya at minsan nga hindi na nagsasalita at sasabihin niya lang sa akin **"GIMINGAW NAKO NILA, BENG"** (namimis na daw niya magulang niya). At sasabihin pa niya kung magiging masaya kaya daw ba magulang niya kapag nakita nila ang apo nila. Well, sagot ko naman bakit hindi? Magulang ko nga sobrang saya ehh, sayo pa kaya.
Diba? ***This were just some of the thoughts about missing someone*** na sobrang mahalaga sayo. At ang magulang natin ang pinaka mahalaga sa lahat, kasi pag wala sila ay wala rin tayo rito sa mundo.
Kaya, **Losing both parents is really an unending grief.**
***~end***
@Janz
I would like to send my regards and thanks to my sponsors @nheng1118 @Eunoia @Cineholicand to @Eybyoung. My unending thanks to all of you and more power also to all your articles.
To the upvoters of my previous article entitled **When I thought I'm Lost****, to** @OfficialGamboaLikeUs **also again to** @Cineholic and @Eunoia https://read.cash/@Janz/when-i-thought-im-lost-eb832b43
Maraming salamat!!!!
**Lead image source:** https://www.nursebuff.com/prayers-for-the-departed/
My third sponsorship of the day @Eybyoung Thank you sis for being one of my sponsors. I'm really overwhelmed. Thanks a lot.
When I thought I'm Lost
Have you experienced the feeling of being lost? Like, you were being left behind. The feeling that you don't know what to do anymore as if your carrying the world in your shoulder. **Lost,** the thought that you were enable to achieved on something and became weak.
***In this article, I wanted to share something in me and something in my experienced that I really felt and thought that I was lost.***
When I was in my teenage years or my high school days, I must say that I was very faithful serving the church. I used to be a catechists for four consecutive years in my barrio. I taught every May in our chapel to kids the so called "Flores de Mayo" event for Catholic faith. I used to be the leader of the "Youth BEC" or "Basic Ecclesial Community for Youth" in my place. I'm also the one who leads the daily rosary in our barrio every 6PM. And, I used to be a psalmist and a lector in our chapel. I even joined some Diocesan Youth Day that time.
In other words, I was very active in doing most of the activities related to church. Where in fact I was the representative in our barrio if ever there were meetings and seminars to be attended which was manifested by our Parish.
But then suddenly, when I started to go to college everything change I became inactive to all of that. Even going to church on Sunday to attend a mass were just became seldom to me and until such time that I didn't go to church anymore. The worst is I even forgot some of the prayers in the holy rosary because I stopped reciting it for the long time. I guess it was a year that I've been doing this. I became busy and committed with my studies until such time that I forgot all this things.
After such time, I got sick. Yes, I was very ill. My allergy strikes me until I can't breath properly and I had lots of red spots in my body especially in my face. And after that attacked, I guess it was two days after I got fine with my allergy attacks. I then experienced severe fever, that was one week that I suffer from that fever and I was just in our home that whole week my parents took care of me that time. I always keep vomiting and then there was some red spots that came out from my body and I thought that was just because of my allergy that is why I took my anti-allergy pill but there were no changes. Until at the 7th day that I really got dehydrated I was already pale that time and I can't even get up. My father told me, (it was midnight that time) that we were going to the hospital. I refuses that because I knew it will costs a lot again and we don't have enough. But since my father insisted, that's why the got me to hospital and to find out that what I felt was already because I had dengue already. When we got to the hospital, my lips were all violet and my skin color as well that is why the doctor in charged in the emergency room where somehow shocked when he saw me and they tested my blood, platelet and everything and yes it was confirmed that I had infected by a dengue and that my platelet that time were almost zero as what the doctor said.
One of my co-patient told me that I was still so lucky and that my immune system were very strong because he told us that he had known someone just like my age that had also infected by a dengue that wasn't able to make it for just having fever for 4 days and was being late when they go to a hospital because the patient were already dead unlike me that I stayed one week first in the house suffers from repetitive fever not knowing that it was already because of dengue.
For what my co-patient told us, I really felt lucky because I had survived that for one week. So, it was a total of two weeks that I had to get cured with that sickness.
The most worst, is that after a week of being diagnosed and already recovered by a dengue I had my breakdown also which I mentioned this in my previous articles. A **psychological breakdown which I had experienced to be crazy for one day as in the definition of crazy.** Just like what you see for other people that suffers from severe depression and had a bipolar state. Yes, I experienced to be bipolar. I even diagnosed to have a stage 1 bipolar.
That time, when I experienced consecutive illness or shall I say the dark days of my life that I experienced so far, hopefully it won't happen again. I truly asked myself, is there a God? Why did he gave me all this things?
**This was the time that I thought I was being lost because as what I've mentioned above, I somehow forgot Him. I forgot to pray and praise for Him. And then, I questioned Him? That was a very unthoughtful and unfaithful of me.**
I even realized, why did I question Him and why did I thought I was being lost? Where in fact, it was given to me as a challenged of life where I'll able to surpassed. And thought, that God won't gave us problems we can't take. That is why, when I almost died because of dengue since I almost got a zero line platelet I always thought up until now that I still have tasks to do in this world and He still have plans for me too.
That kind of thought that I was being lost, it was just a mere thought and not a reality at all. Instead, it was all happened to me because it will let me realized and reflects on different things in life and would somehow made me strong enough to face and handle life's circumstances.
"When something happens to us, for whatever it is either a hard one or not, we always remember that there were reasons for everything and that reasons would gave us reflections, learnings and realizations to what really is it's purpose."
**So, WHEN I THOUGHT I'M LOST BUT I DIDN'T.**
Happy reading.
@Janz
I just want to mention here my first two sponsors @nheng1118 and @Eunoia again my unending thanks to both of you because you supported my articles here even if I'm not that good enough in writing. Thank you, Thank you you really had a beautiful heart.
Also thanks a lot to my upvoters both to my article and to some of my comments here in read.cash @Cineholic @JonicaBradley @OfficialGamboaLikeUs Thank you so much for helping me earn here. More powers to all of you.
**Lead image source:** https://phuezo.tumblr.com/post/647113773261438976/bumbleby-reunion-again-3-b-i-thought-i-lost
New sponsor again for today.. @Eunoia thank thank you, Wow I'm so happy today I had two already. Thank you both of you
I just wanted to say my heartfelt thanks to my first ever sponsor here in read.cash. To @nheng1118 my infinite thanks to you. Your so kind.
The Impact of Social Medias nowadays...
In this article, I would like to express my opinions on the different Impacts of Social Media which I observed and seen in this challenging world and also based on what my experienced is. Because, it is very visible to all of us that nowadays social media platforms are most commonly and widely used by every individual.
*You can also shares and comment down your thoughts about this article.*
***Now, I would like to start my thoughts of this topic this way...***
In this 21st century, we all knew that technologies are somehow already dominating the world. In the workplace, in different organizations and mostly to humans. We cannot deny the fact that most of us too were into the social medias. I must say, probably out of 10 there were 9 who are already engaging to this said platforms.
Everything has it's POSITIVE and NEGATIVE impacts and more so to Social Media...
**By the definition of INVESTOPEDIA,** ***social media is a computer-based technology that facilitates the sharing of ideas, thoughts, and information through the building of virtual networks and communities. By design, social media is Internet-based and gives users quick electronic communication of content. Content includes personal information, documents, videos, and photos. Users engage with social media via a computer, tablet, or smartphone via web-based software or applications.***
Therefore, we can do everything in social media. I would like to share some of the impacts of social media based on my experienced and observations since I myself are engaging into this kind of platforms too.
We are all aware of the different kinds of social media that are commonly used nowadays. To cite some, there are Facebook, twitter, Instagram, Tiktok, YouTube and etc. But Facebook were the most common and vastly used by many since according to my research it has 2.7 billion users.
**Now, let's start with the positive impact of social media:** *(based only from my opinions and observations)*
Social media allows us to communicate with different kinds of people around the world. We can easily talked to our loved ones even if they're far from us. We can have friends from outside our country if we want to just by the power of communication through social media.
Also, we can even find our meant to be through social media. Right?
Social media enables us to raise awareness for the betterment of an individual and even to the community we live in. An awareness that we help others be mindful and to knowledge on something by posting our type of awareness we want to tell to the world.
Social media also serves as an outlet for us to express our thought and feelings too in a positive way or manner.
We also can seek some emotional support through social media.
So, what I mentioned above are just some of it's positive effects to humankind that are into it. But, they said the system to be balance the positive it must be paired to a negative one.
And this goes also to social media... it has it's positive impacts but there are also lots of negative impacts to it.
**To cite some negative impacts of social media:** *(based only from my opinions and observations)*
Social medias as what it was being defined by Investopedia it is the source also of information. And through that we can get lots of fake news from social media which became as it's negative effects. These kinds of information which are fake ones definitely can brought chaos to people.
Also, social media can increased the risks of depression and loneliness because we cannot avoid some suicidal thoughts that we may read and seen on social medias which brought the increased of anxiety. Since, in social media there were lots of people posting some unnecessary posts and negative posts which are not really helping the users to be mentally and emotionally healthy. These kind of situation I must say is the risky part of engaging to social medias.
That is why, as user to the different platforms of social medias we must be mindful and responsible for what to posts and to posts because we don't know we can be one of the contributor why there were people commits suicides. Instead, we must posts awareness, a positive awareness to all and a positive thoughts that somehow will serves as motivations and inspirations to other people and to the people around us.
Let's also be aware the different netiquettes for us to be more responsible of using and engaging to a certain kind of social media.
In the end, it's always a matter of RESPONSIBILITY at all.
This is what I can say towards the negative impacts of social media.
**"Be responsible and be mindful as well."**
Happy reading....
-Janz
Special thanks again to some users that are very supportive to my articles.... @Eunoia and @leejhen for again upvoting my article entitled "A Warrior Baby". My heartfelt and infinite thanks to both of you.
A Warrior Baby
I wanted to asked those mommies like me.
Have you experienced to have a risky pregnancy? Something like you suffers from lots of illness while you were pregnant? Even taking many tablets for you you to feel fine which was risky to do because you had a baby inside you? Well, mommies my pregnancy period was very tough and it was really a tiring moment for me to think that I almost surrender.
***Why I said so? Because this is what happen during my pregnancy period where I can say that my baby is truly a WARRIOR.***
Well, this is my story.... the time when I was pregnant with first child.
To start with, when I was in my first trimester I haven't felt anything. It was just a smooth pregnancy. I don't feel anything that time. But when the start of my second trimester, my allergy started to attacked me. Because they say, that if you were pregnant you were very vulnerable to diseases. Since I had already an allergy in the first place, during the start my second trimester as what I've mentioned above it starts to attacked me up until my last trimester. There were no weeks in that time that I wasn't visited with my allergy and that was the very tiring part for me because when my allergy strikes, I really can't breath properly and what's painful that time is that my stomach were aching as if there something inside my stomach that punch my internal organs there. It was really aching much, very painful which causes me to vomits again and again. The fact that I had carrying a baby in my womb and I can't breath properly, my stomach ached so much and I vomits and vomits until I felt that my stomach were fine already but it was going to be fine for a while and then it will aches again and I vomited again. That was so hard, I always thought of what will happen to my baby the fact that I also take medications every time my allergy attacked me.
I remembered, there was one time when my allergy attacks me. I was in my 8th month of pregnancy that time. I almost surrender that day, because it was really painful, my stomach were very painful because if the red spot doesn't came out yet my stomach won't stop from aching even if I take tablets already. I vomits many times where I almost got dehydrated. I asked myself that time, why me? of all people why me? Why I had this allergy in the first place where in fact I'm not asking for this. What I always though that time to still keep fighting from my allergy is the baby inside my womb. And I always had the feeling of being afraid of what will happen to my baby once it comes out, I was afraid if my baby isn't normal if it will be born. The fact that I had take a lots of tablets because of my allergy. I had that thought before. That is why I always talked to my tummy before, I talked to my baby that hopefully he will be fine.
Another part of my pregnancy period where I can say my baby really is a warrior is that when I'm already in my last month period I accidentally fell down from a septic tank hole and was being bitten by many bees because there was a house of the bees inside the hole. I was just lucky since my tummy wasn't hit by the cement and stones inside the hole. After that, I was really worried because my baby inside my tummy doesn't move even a single move of his butt and legs. He was really not moving that whole time until the whole night and the tomorrow comes my baby still not moving. I was already afraid that time of what worn with him why isn't he moving at all. I guess that was 24 hours the my baby isn't moving. And, of course as a mother you have that worries about what really happen. That is why, we gone to an Ob-gyne and had took an ultrasound and that was the only time I felt his already moving inside me. I was happy because the result of the ultrasound was just normal.
Lastly, is when I already had my labor.
During my labor, I had hard time to gave birth of him that is why there lots of pushed and pushed that I did for him to go out. The last, pushed I did was when the doctor already said that I need to let him out for that last pushed because if I didn't I won't be able to see him. I was afraid and was nervous already that time I don't know what to do if that would happened. Before I did my last pushed, I prayed that I should be able to do it this time. Then I take deep breath and then I did it, when my doctor said that his out already I was kind of happy but the sad thing there is that my baby did not cry, and he was very pale and his face was all violet and his not moving. I was shocked and didn't utter any words because I don't what to say. I just realized the doctor said to me that, "I was one of the witnessed that my baby wasn't crying" and then they run out with my baby toward the other room and said they need to helped my baby cry and breath because his not breathing at all. I was crying inside the labor room because I'm afraid. ***AFRAID, from the thought that what if I will lose him.*** I'm praying that they can recover my baby. And, yes they did.
When the doctor came back, I directly asked her if how was my baby and she said his crying already and was already fine.
When I heard that, I felt that I was really blessed and I was very thankful that God helped my son fought for his life. That is why I always says that my son now is truly a WARRIOR. A warrior, because he'd experienced a lot of hardship while inside my womb and even when the time he comes out.
And now, I must say that my son were very healthy and his living his life right now happy as a kid.
Now, seeing my son smiles. It really made my day complete because knowing the fact that there were lots of challenges I faced when he was still in my womb.
***My son, is definitely a living proof of a true warrior.*** **I LOVE YOU MY SON.**
I will do my best to gave my son the life that he needs and be worth of together with his "tatay" father.
-Janz
Special thanks to some users here in read.cash that supports and upvoted my previous article which is "I hide my pain with a Smile". . . to @leejhen and @sh33la. My heartfelt thanks to both of you.
I hide my Pain with a Smile
Have you experienced to smile, but it was just a fake smile? To be happy in front of everyone but deep inside your bleeding. Have you also experienced to be tough and brave but deeply your horribly afraid and the truth is you really felt nervous? And, to laugh loudly in front of everyone as if your totally fine but your not.
Well, I experienced all of this things. To be happy but the truth is I'm not really happy. To gave a smile but that was just fake. To be able to laugh with friends but the truth is I'm hiding something painful. To make others laughed because of my corny jokes but the truth is when I'm alone I'm deeply in pain. These are one of the things that made me depressed. Suddenly, when I was in my 3rd year college there were such time that I can't able to endure it anymore and that leads to my painful breakdown which I wasn't in my state of being for the whole day as if I'm really crazy that whole day where I never expected to happen.
One of the factor that I must say affects me to be in pain that time is the fact that I've seen my parents fighting when I was just a kid like my elementary days until I grow up and enters college I still witnessed my parents were fighting. That means I grow up witnessing my parents fighting over and over again and that was really painful to me. There were even a time, I was already in my first year in college my father got drunk and what I thought that time is that they were not fought each other because my mother took care of my father. That is why I left them both in our house because I also find my siblings and let them go home that time. But, what shocked me the most is that, when I was on my way home already with my siblings we heard a loud shout from our home that is we run towards our home and that sees my father and mother fighting again. I was really angry that time, because they still never stops fighting knowing the fact that their kids were already grown up. That is why when my father left the house I followed him, I was shocked with his reaction when I called him because he closed his fist and tried to punch me. Why my father did that? Because when my father get drunk he does not know anymore whose that persons in front of him even me his daughter he doesn't know that I am his daughter and he just though I'm his enemy. So, that is why that time my father grabs my shirt and tried to pull me up. I already cried that time, and our neighbors already helped us and calmed my father. But that event, brought me to nervous breakdown. I was very pale that time and I can't able to breath properly and something like my mouth deformed and I can't say clearly and utter clearly words. It's something like a stroke. But, thankfully our neighbors helped me that time they massage me until I get okay and fine. My father that time, I really felt his regrets. He hugged me and asked forgiveness of what he did. Me, I was just crying that time because I don't know what to say and don't know what to react. But after this happening, I was very thankful because that was the last time that I've seen my parents fighting and also the last time that I've seen my father drank a lot of alcohols up until now. Maybe that was their realization part because if ever there were something worst happen to me probably they won't forgave there selves because they were the one brought me to that situation. But, I'm just so thankful because that happening really brought peace to my parents. They never fought each other after that and somehow my dream for them which is to to stop fighting especially in front of us their kids came true.
I just shares that experienced because I wanted to let all of you know why there were times that I hide my pain with a smile. That pain that I mean is the pain from the fact that I always witnessed my parents fighting in front of us. But when I go out with my friends, when I'm at school I laughed a lot and sometimes I throws jokes to them for them to laughed, but all of that is just my way of letting myself forgets the happenings in my home. My friend and classmates knows me when I'm with them they really sees me like a happy go lucky girl like don't have any pains inside. Right gurl @Zhyne06 and madam @fredyzza07 you both know me and I know you sees me like I don't have problems inside because I always laughed like there is no tomorrow. But guyses, the truth is that I'm really in pain that time but my problem is I'm not that courageous enough to shares to you what my pain is and I chose to just keep it in me. Which, somehow I must not the right thing to do. Because I should opened up my pains to my friend, my close friends for me to also breath from it. But since I'm a coward girl, I didn't. Even if I told them, it's not really the whole story at all, still I have that pain insides me. That is why, when I was in my third year in college I broke down for the whole day. As I've mentioned, I wasn't in my state of being. I talked nonsense like those crazy people who roams around the streets that has their own world. I became and experienced to be one of them for the one day, it was whole Saturday.
But, I already get over this kind of things. For now, I always said my pains to my partner and just thankful that he also willing to listened to my rants about my pain and comforted for me which somehow makes me feel comfortable.
***For now, hiding pain with a smile.... is not really me at all. I'm already the other way around.***
So, for those who have the same experienced as me. All I can say is that, it's really not good for us if we keep the pain that we felt inside because there were comes a time that we cannot endure it and will lead to the worst and terrible things that may happen to us. What if we cannot control anymore the pain and we will be totally depressed? What will happen to us? and What will happen to our dreams?
Therefore, let's not be shy and instead let's be brave to tell our painful stories that hides within us to someone that are willing to listen and to someone you felt your comfortable of telling your stories.
-Janz
Special mention to some users that are very generous to me: @Eunoia , @Eybyoung for always upvoting my articles. To @leejhen and @Jane di ko ma mention, but anyways thank you too for upvoting my comments. Godbless all of you.
Lead image source:https://www.google.com/search?q=hiding+pain+with+a+smile&sxsrf=ALeKk00KMX9yGNbAeppeGE8PXfTiG-7sFA:1622687177140&source=lnms&tbm=isch&sa=X&ved=2ahUKEwjri5nmtPrwAhVEZt4KHb4uDNcQ_AUoAXoECAEQAw&biw=1366&bih=657#imgrc=MJrUFUReTS7s_M
When my parents needs me financially but I don't have enough...
Have you experienced the feeling that your parents asked something, just a little amount because they had nothing but you don't have enough to give? Well, I'm not saying that our parents will forced us to gave them what they want and what they asked for they just hoped if we could have gave a little amount since they don't have nothing though.
***It's not the responsibility of the children to provide everything to their parents if the children had already a stable work.***
Yes I believe in that, but as their sons and daughters of course it's in our mind that we somehow has responsibility for them as our parents. Of course, they were the one who always provide us everything until we became what we are. They were the one who took care of us and gave us the education that we need that's why we became educated and had finished some degree. Therefore, I must say that somehow we as their child must compensate everything what they provide us starting from the day we are born up until we became what we are now and we are already capable of working. That is why to make them happy which I must say the most goal of a child is to make their parents happy and proud at the end. That is also my goal.
But in my experience, I really wanted to help my parents financially because I knew that they had nothing. My father have an operation recently in his cataract which means none of them can provide their daily needs like their foods and other things since my father can't go to work yet because of his operation in his eyes and knowing that I had still siblings with them which are still at the age of 9 and 12 which means still needs support.
But what makes me so sad is the fact that I still don't have enough to somehow support them because I also have my own family too. I have my kid that needs my financial support too. Yes, I already graduated and even have a licensed too in teaching but due to this pandemic it's hard for me to have a job but as of now I'm still on the process for it. Yes, I had a job now which is teaching online but my service fee for it is not enough for me to support my family financially because it only sufficed my son's needs. It's very hard for me knowing that I am their oldest child and among all their children I am the one that has the degree already and yet I can't still be able to support them.
Also, one thing my father needs another financial support too because he still needs to let his other eye be operated due to cataract again since it was his two eyes that got affected with cataract. I wanted to help that but since I still don't have enough for it. This were some of the things that really made me so sad. Sometimes, I've been asking myself, why didn't I make myself stable first before I engaged to have my own family? Because, if ever I've been stable first I would have provide or support my family while providing also my own family. These kind of thoughts and realizations always comes in my mind every time my parents asked me something even just a little amount but I don't have enough to give.
Just today, because of this platform I accumulated bch and I get a little amount of that and send it to my mother. I was a little shy of them because for now I can only gave them little amount but I was just so lucky because I had a parents that are also understanding. They never confronted me from everything and that I will be forever grateful that I had a parents like them.
Thankful for this platform read.cash because I somehow earned just by writing articles aside from what I've earned by teaching online. This was a great help of me too in this time of pandemic.
I always said to myself that someday everything will be okay and I could already make my family happy and will lessen their financial stress and could give them the life there worth to have.
In God's will.
Lead image source: https://www.google.com/search?q=girl+sad+wallpaper&tbm=isch&ved=2ahUKEwjx3tn8s_jwAhUkIqYKHXcACZIQ2-cCegQIABAA&oq=girl+sad+wallpaper&gs_lcp=CgNpbWcQAzICCAAyAggAMgIIADICCAAyAggAMgIIADICCAAyAggAMgIIADICCAA6BggAEAcQHjoGCAAQCBAeUNCyBFj40QRghtUEaAJwAHgAgAGjAYgBmwiSAQMwLjeYAQCgAQGqAQtnd3Mtd2l6LWltZ8ABAQ&sclient=img&ei=fDC3YPGwGaTEmAX3gKSQCQ&bih=657&biw=1366#imgrc=JAfFjb47IM9-fM
The Reality Behind an Online Teacher
During this pandemic, there were lots of people lost their jobs and had the hardship of having a job. But, since we are human we had the strong personality in finding such things that maybe a substitute from the different effects that this outbreak brought to our lives. Just like what I've mention to my previous article, that for us to be productive and to be able to sustains our needs we always find ways for it. Like for example, as what we did with my partner we tried to do gardening while we are facing pandemic, and I myself also did a homebased job which is teaching online to Chinese students. Also, joining some platforms where we can earned money even just little by little like the noise cash and read.cash which were both legit paying platform. These were just some of the things that I may say a substitute for the lost jobs we had in this times.
In my case, since I already got my licensed as a professional teacher last September 2019 I'm already in the process of my application to the DepEd or Department of Education and while I am waiting for that application I needed to do some part-time job because that application in DepEd is not yet sure because we are in this pandemic time. I needed to seek for a home-based job since I also have a kid so it's difficult for me to be away from my kid that is why I chose to work online. Also for my son's needs too.
Last March, I applied to many companies that offers online job teaching and one of them hired me since most of the company that I applied for were very strict in the internet connection used. And since my internet connection is just powered by LTE and they mostly hired those having a wired dsl internet connection and sad thing, I don' t have that kind of connection for now. But still, I was lucky since there is this one company that isn't particular with the internet provider being used as long as the applicant meet the required downlink and uplink mbps. And yes, I passed their technical checked and I was able to start teaching online last March 27. I was teaching Chinese students both kids and adults.
In my first 15 days, I was so amazed of my service fee because I had almost 10k in my first cut off. I always had fully booked in my first 15 days. I plotted 5 hours on weekdays starting 6PM until 11PM and 12 hours on weekends. That time I was always fully booked and I was so happy because if you are fully booked means you will have bigger service fee at the end of the cut off. After that my second 15 days or cut-off were totally different. Yes, I still have lots of students who booked my class but I was somehow disappointed with the penalties since I got bigger penalties in my 2nd cut-off due to absences that I never wanted or never planned it was because of power outage which causes my absences. Since, I don't have back up battery for my computer in case there will be brownout, therefore I really can't avoid the penalties. The sad thing there is that, the ESL company that I am working now has the worst penalties because there penalties is much more bigger than the hourly rate which is very hurting. Because of my absences, my booking rate were affected from being fully booked I only had the maximum of 6-8 students per day on weekdays which also lowers my service fees. Even though I've read a lots pf negative feedbacks toward the company I'm working now, I still ignores it even if I already experienced the negative rants of my co-teacher in this said company. But since I don't have other work aside from this, that is why I still work for this company up until now. Since, I also hold onto the thought that, even I just earned little amount at least I had this amount to be able to provide the needs of my son daily. And on thing is that, I had many regular students that was always loyal in booking my class.
Well, I must say based on my experienced....
Teaching online is not easy. Some would say that it was just an easy job because were just sitting while delivering the lesson, they say just sitting while earning. Well, definitely there is no such easy job. Yes, were just sitting but the fact that were being exposed daily to radiation is not easy. It is tiring, your health is at risks in this kind of job. Yes, we can choose what time we can plot our schedules but the peaking hours were at night that is why I need to plot schedules at night. Probably, others would say that this kind of work is not tiring. Well, NO, this is really tiring but I always endure it because I wanted to earn at least a good earning were I can be able to raise a kid and be able to help my family. Also, talking with different kind of students with different personalities especially to Chinese students which doesn't really good in understanding English were very difficult because language barrier is there which may be the reason for ineffective learning.
When I started this job, I suffers already from anemic or the low blood pressure. It is because I always sleep late and it is already hard for me to sleep 7 hours to 8 hours per day. That is why, there were lots of times that I feel dizzy and sometimes vomits because of it. But still I endure it because I have a goal to achieved.
What I wanted to share is that, as an online teacher there were many things to be learned from it. One of that is how to managed time so that health won't be at risks, how to delivers the lessons wherein the students can definitely understands you, how to catch student's attention especially kids which are very hyperactive and has only a short attention span and to shift characters in the way of teaching kids to teaching adults. These were just some of its consideration. Therefore it's really not an easy job. Lastly, knowing the fact about the sad penalty where there is no considerations at all is also one of the unmotivated part.
But, despites all that.... I really tried not to feel tired and not to feel unmotivated because I need to do this not for myself but for my family and most importantly for my son.
Just keep on fighting.
-Janz
------------------------------------------------------------------
Special thanks again to the generous people who always upvoted my article @Eunoia and @Eybyoung for upvoting again my latest article which is the "Being a Neophyte Parent". My endless thanks to both of you.
Also, to my friends here in read.cash @Zhyne06 , @fredyzza07 , @ThisisGrace21 well, "mga maams laban lang gyud ta". Never quit just fight and fight towards our goals. Someday, we will be able to tastes the fruit of our labor.
Being a Neophyte Parents
We all knew that most of us wanted to have our own family. But the question is, how ready are we to have our own family? Are we financially stable to raise a kid if ever we are given a kid? Can we sustain the needs of having a family? Well, these were just some of the questions that comes to our mind when it come to the thought of having our own family.
Also, the thought of becoming a parent is not a joke. There are lost of things need to be considered before engaging to this kind of life, the parenthood. Well, in my experienced I became a parent without planning it well. Shall I say, it was unexpected for me since my plan is that I will engaged to be a parent and to have my family if I am stable financially and at the age of 25 and up. But this wasn't realized in my case. Therefore, I must say that I wasn't ready to become a mother that time because I knew that I'm not yet stable both I and my partner were not yet ready for it and not yet financially stable to raise a kid. But, since we've already doing things beyond boyfriend and girlfriend thing that is why the unexpected things happened to us and that is having a baby in a wrong time.
When we knew that I was pregnant already, that was the time of my last month in college and my boyfriend that time were still in his 2nd year of college. We were struggling that time and we always had a silent war because of what happen and the worst there is when I left him because I cannot accept of what happen to me because in the first place it wasn't my goal that time. My goal was, after I graduate I will seek immediately for a job to help my parents and that I thought I will just disappoint my parents for what happen to me that is I left my boyfriend that time. But, I was just so lucky since he never agreed for leaving him because for him he has the responsibility to take, he had already a responsibility towards me that is why he tried to change my mind and we both planned for what is the best to do. At that time were not telling everyone about our situation even my bestfriend that time @Zhyne06 I neve told her my situation because we don't want others to know about it. Until such time I graduated already, I graduated with a trophy that only myself and my boyfriend knows. Still, after I graduated I seek for a job a teaching job to some private school and yes I was still lucky because I was hired in the private school that I applied for that time. As time pass by, I've been very vulnerable wherein my allergy always attacks me and that was the reason why I decided to quit my job that time because there were no such weeks that my allergy won't attacked me and that was so hard for me because I always commits absences therefore my choice that time is to resigned from my job.
It was also the time that I and my partner decided to tell the truth to my parents and also to his. And I am just so lucky that my parents accepted my situation and I never heard any bad things that they said to me instead they help me in my pregnancy period especially my mom she always accompanied me every time I had my prenatal and even until I gave birth my parents were there beside me supported me.
And last December, me and my partner decided to stay together because we don't want to gave more hassles to my parents that's why last December we already stayed together with our son up until now. Staying together knowing that we both financially unstable were very hard especially that we had a son that needs our financial support for his needs daily. That is why the thought of becoming a parent where both of us wasn't ready in all terms for it was not a joke since it's a matter of responsibility for both of us and without money, we cannot be able to buy the needs of our son which was the sad part of being a neophyte parent without nothing said to be stable. It's hard, very hard. But we always have the positive thoughts that after this hardship is already a rainbow for us.
Still, were both so lucky despites every circumstances. Why, because my partner were still a scholar that is why he continues his studies now and he's already in 3rd year college. His stipend in his scholar somehow helped us financially and we were able to bought a computer for that and that is why I able to work online since I am already a licensed teacher that is why I have work which is to teach online to a particular ESL company and this somehow helped us in our daily needs especially we were able to gave the needs of our child daily. And a part from that my partner had his garden also which will help us financially too.
That is why, I conclude that being a neophyte parent is not easy. We must first make sure that we were ready to become a parent and that we were sure that we are financially stable so that we can give the needs of our child which is very important because we don't want our child suffers from our wrong decisions. That is why, me and my partner tried our 100% best to gave what we can to our son since this is our decision so we must bare it's consequences and one of that is not to let our son suffer from it. We never denies that sometime me and my partner argued on things but we tried not to let it affects us especially to our son.
We don't know how to be a good parent, but we tried to be one.
-Janz
Also, to sis @Eybyoung and to @Eunoia thank you both for upvoting my previous articles. You were so kind and generous. Thank you.
Gardening this pandemic is Essential
This pandemic we had experiencing right now really brought chaos to the world. There were lots of people suffers from it, many families were not able to sustained their finances and there lots of people lost this jobs and many people had the hard time of getting a job. All this were just some few effects of this pandemic that we faced today. But the good thing also is that, this pandemic opens a lot of doors towards other things, like working from home, lots of time bonds with the family, able to relaxed in some way to some stress works and mostly people nowadays as what I observed too, were so busy planting vegetables and other crops in their respective gardens.
Last February, my partner told me that he wanted to plant eggplants since they have the area to do the said planting. Definitely I agreed to his idea and we planned to plant lots of eggplants for us to also sell it to the market in order to have some money too since we have a kid that needs our financial support to his daily needs. Yes, we bought seedling of an eggplant and it has 800 pieces of seeds. And were very lucky that 90% of them germinates. My partner starts plotting first the seedlings.
We able to plant 500 plus seedlings, since we can't avoid that there were some seedlings that were wasted and we just very thankful that all of the seedling that we planted grows healthy. My partner always make sure to gave the fertilizers needed for the plant to grow healthier and there will no worms, ants and other bugs that can penetrate the plants for them not to grow well. I was just very thankful, that amidst pandemic we can still be able to do such things that helps us for living. Just recently I visited our garden, and I was so amazed that the eggplants start to bloom already. I've seen flowers in it already and aside from eggplants we also planted "ampalaya" and tomatoes.
Also, gardening I must say were very enjoying. The fact that, we can make viands fresh from the garden especially if we don't have any money to buy some foods in the market. Our garden will serves also as our source of food which is very essential since vegetables brought a lot of vitamins to our immune systems and it is good for the healthy lifestyle.
Aside from that, gardening in times of pandemic is very relevant since this may helped us survived from not going outside to buy something to eat. So instead of going out, we were going to the garden and get something to eat which is much healthier than buying from the market. Well, I'm not saying that gardening nowadays is the only essential thing to do. Well, there are lots of things that we can able to do in this time that we had right now for us to still be productive and of course for us to earn money while at home. Gardening is just one of the things that most of the people are doing it today, and knowing that fact, it was really amazing since it only reflects that we as humans, are very good in finding ways just to be productive despites the happenings in the world. We never lose hopes and still we strives for the better.
Also, it always a matter of hard work. If you were such a hardworking person then everything will just be easy for you and graces will surely comes in you.
*Sometimes, me and my partner also argued on both our time because sometimes we can't be able to managed our time properly which lead us to arguing. Since, my partner needs to go everyday in the garden to do some works there for the plants to grow healthy but sometimes our time conflicts since I also worked online. Just recently we argued on it because he had to go the garden to spray medicine for our plants because there some insects that prevents the plants to grow, and that day also I accepted a paper works to one of my student and that conflicts our time which somehow leads to arguing.*
I shared that, because I just wanted to let others know that in times of pandemic whatever things you may do to sustains living both ends if you had already a partner must always talks about the time of when the other one can works and the other will be the one to take care of the kid and vice versa to avoid such this king quarrel.
Well, planning on doing things like doing a garden must be mutual to both sides also in order to understands each others time.
Lastly, all I can say to all people out there....
"NEVER LOSE HOPES, JUST THINK SOME INITIATIVES TO BE ABLE TO BE PRODUCTIVE IN TIMES LIKE THIS AND HARD WORKING IS ALWAYS THE KEY FOR US TO DO SUCH THINGS THAT MAYBE HELPFUL FOR OUR DAILY LIVING"
Just don't let this pandemic ruins our capability to do work. NEVER!
-Janz
Enjoy your day everyone and hope in some way I'll be able to shares something that gives you inspiration and lessons in life.
Parent's Love is Unconditional
According to Elizabeth Earnshaw a certified Gottman therapist,
Our parents is the reason why we are experiencing this life we had right now since they allow us to sees how challenging the world is. I must say there are different kinds of parents in this world, some were lucky of having their parents and some also were not because of some circumstances. In my case, I should say that I was very lucky to have such parent that are very supportive, caring and of course a loving one. My parents were able to give us all their six children the right to live, right to education and gives us the needs as their children since we were born and up until now. They were such amazing parents to us because they gave us their unconditional love. The love that is limitless and no boundaries at all even though there were times that we made them headaches still, they never stops caring us and loved us.
Before, when I never knew this things and my mind isn't matured yet I always felt that my parents doesn't loved me at all especially the time when I started to engaged in "puppy love" or whatever it calls, I started to had a boyfriend thing and that time I was still 17 years old. I always keep it secret to them because every time they knew they will just scolded me especially my mom. That time I felt, that they never felt the care for me and the love itself which I was wrong in the first place and I regret that time I felt that way to my parents because I was just being selfish that time and all I cared was my end and never cared for the reason behind their rants to me. For I knew they did that just for my own good and not theirs. Also, my parents does everything for us to have better life in the future and sad thing there is such times even if they can't eat as long as we their children can, that's already a very fulfilling for them.
There were lot of times that I felt the unconditional love of my parents that's when I get sick and hospitalized due to dengue and depression they were there beside me took care of me. Every time my allergy attacks me, they both there to look for me. and whatever I asked them especially in my studies they never failed me. And even now that I had already my own my family, if ever I'm struggling in financial thing they were always there to give me even if I'm not asking for it they still gives me. That is why, I am very lucky to have them as my parents and they were one of the reason why I strives for the better and work harder to reach my goals because they were one of my goals that hopefully someday I can somehow gave back to them their unstoppable love and support for me as their daughter.
Parents will do everything they can to protect, to care and to love their children. I fully understood that kind of unconditional love when I also experienced to be a parent because yes, I am already a mother with a 1-year old son. That is why I truly reflected everything and that unconditional love is truly limitless, a love that has no condition, a pure love. Being a parent, even if I'm still a newbie parent I already know how to love unconditionally because I cannot count already the amount of love that I have for my son since its countless and limitless I said. Just like my parents, I also wanted the best for my son and I worked harder for my son for me to give his needs because in the first place my son needs that love from me, from us his dad and even he won't asked for it we already gave our 100 percent love to him.
Now, as a parent I salute those who has this unconditional love for their children.
I knew someone that also has this kind of love to their child and its my friend @Zhyne06and to madam Janiza,@fredyzza07 I cannot mention you madam I don't know why.
Let's welcome ourselves into motherhood. I knew were just a neophyte moms but I knew too that unconditional love towards our child is already present in us even at the first moment we sees our kids.
Also to mommy @Eybyoung who also shares to me one time her kid who always sleeps late at night. I'm really amazed of you were you still plays with your kid at midnight. That's what a mother is and a mother will be.
To all parents out there, I salute all of you. Let's be a good parent to them and makes them felt that kind of unconditional love.
- Janz
Letting go of Insecurities...
**Am I good enough?**
That kind of question that we always asked in ourselves is one of the sign that we suffers from insecurities. Insecurities, the fact that we were expecting the best and we failed to do it and then you will felt that you weren't that good enough. It something that , you were not contented of what you are, what you achieved and to what you do. All you feels and radiates to yourself is the negativities and of course the insecurities in life. Because of that we missed to feel the happiness that life offered us to be if ever we felt that happiness and still not letting go of insecurities then that kind will not lasts longer and knowing that, it is very sad since we only live once in this crucial and challenging world. So it's better for us to start letting go our insecurities in life if we wanted to feel that kind of happiness in this world. We must be contented.
***"Do not feed your insecurities, it will consume you." - Dodinsky***
Seeing this quote on google, I realized one thing.... We should not allow ourselves be the slaves of insecurities and negativities because if we allow it, we cannot live the life we aimed to be here in this world. That is why, letting go of negative thoughts is the starting point of everything. Instead, we must look only for the beauty of life where there is no negativities that fosters in it and that way we can live fully, happy and contented. Most of all we can live peacefully.
I, myself felt the kind of insecurities. We are just humans and I know for sure we cannot avoid such feeling as a human being. Probably most of us felt insecure in different ways.
Before, I always felt insecure in my physical appearance knowing that I am fat or shall I say chubby. I had this lots of insecurities in my body where I felt comparing myself to others because I thought if I am not like what I am, I may wear everything I want, I wasn't be bullied by my classmates when I was in my elementary days and even high school days but I learned to just smiled for it. The worst part is that when I was in my grade school where I always cried because they called my "I'm fat, I'm like a pig" and many more. That days all my insecurities came out until when I reached my first year in college. I can't stop myself comparing to others. And then, there was a time that felt sick because of it. After that time, I reflected to myself and asked myself, ***"Why am I not happy?" Why am I not contented? I'm not a rich kid that has everything so I shouldn't feel this way.***
And then, I started to learned to let go of that negative thoughts of mine instead I persevere to study hard and finished a degree which I already attained now. From time to time, I learned how to embraced myself fully, loved myself and never compare myself to others because I knew we have different individualities and we are unique in our own ways. I somehow realized all of this when my mind get matured already and everything goes differently now. I started, letting go all my insecurities and loved myself more than anything else. There is a quote that says, ***"If you want to gain love from other people, then start loving yourself first".***
This somehow, made me realized the importance of embracing myself for what I am and be contented for what I am and what I have. Well, it is not a bad thing to set goals and to dream bigger, the only thing that is not good in there if you or we set foot to other people just to lift up ourselves. That is not definitely the right to do because if ever we did that, we fool others to lift ourselves still we never let go of that insecurities and we maybe slaved for it forever. Also, we will not be happy and mostly we will not reach the success that we set for ourselves.
Therefore, letting go of insecurities is the best decisions that we made for ourselves. Since, after letting it go everything follows accordingly and we can stay happy until our last breath.
Hopefully, you'll get inspired and somehow learned something from my experiences.
Happy to share to you my life, everyone.
Also, I'm very open to any conversations and I will highly appreciates if you can suggest me some improvements I must do in my incoming articles here in read.cash.
Happy day everyone!!!
Source for my lead image : https://www.google.com/search?q=insecurities&tbm=isch&ved=2ahUKEwjogNb-n-vwAhUKxosBHTZPCZcQ2-cCegQIABAA&oq=insecurities&gs_lcp=CgNpbWcQARgCMgQIIxAnMgUIABCxAzIFCAAQsQMyAggAMgIIADICCAAyAggAMgIIADICCAAyAggAOgYIABAFEB5Qo8ABWOjFAWDk0AFoAHAAeACAAZMCiAHoBpIBBTAuNC4xmAEAoAEBqgELZ3dzLXdpei1pbWfAAQE&sclient=img&ei=s0qwYKjbDoqMr7wPtp6luAk&bih=657&biw=1366#imgrc=rNOA6mT57P2lPM&imgdii=W_hxoe1lS1GNbM
Other sources of my images in this article: https://www.google.com/search?q=insecurities+quotes&tbm=isch&ved=2ahUKEwiEp5GMoOvwAhUCdpQKHTDNC5kQ2-cCegQIABAA&oq=insecurities+&gs_lcp=CgNpbWcQARgAMgcIABCxAxBDMgQIABBDMgQIABBDMgQIABBDMgQIABBDMgQIABBDMgQIABBDMgQIABBDMgQIABBDMgQIABBDUIjktgNYiOS2A2Dl97YDaABwAHgAgAGrAYgBqwGSAQMwLjGYAQCgAQGqAQtnd3Mtd2l6LWltZ8ABAQ&sclient=img&ei=z0qwYMSDHYLs0QSwmq_ICQ&bih=657&biw=1366#imgrc=ZrNw-m2ErhDU3M
https://www.google.com/search?q=Do+not+feed+your+insecurities.+It+will+consume+you.&tbm=isch&ved=2ahUKEwiXkPrBu-vwAhWPAqYKHaJgCLoQ2-cCegQIABAA&oq=Do+not+feed+your+insecurities.+It+will+consume+you.&gs_lcp=CgNpbWcQAzoECCMQJzoECAAQQzoHCAAQsQMQQzoICAAQsQMQgwE6BQgAELEDOgIIADoECAAQGDoGCAAQCBAeULWhAViZtgJg0bwCaABwAHgBgAHDAogBl0KSAQgwLjUwLjAuMZgBAKABAaoBC2d3cy13aXotaW1nwAEB&sclient=img&ei=kGewYJeIBo-FmAWiwaHQCw&bih=657&biw=1366#imgrc=EWdw6o-nvnZRXM
Enjoying bitcoin cash/bch nowadays...
Before, all I know and heard about is bitcoin and I never heard on bch or the bitcoin cash crypto and knowing that there were lots of cryptocurrencies aside from what I know before which is the bitcoin which I also knew that it is in it's highest price now or having the highest value if I'm not mistaken.
BCH, bitcoin cash as one of the famous crypto nowadays I must say has really brought happiness to those people or individual who are accumulating this crypto by joining games and any platforms like noise cash and read.cash that truly gives bch and this makes them and of course I myself enjoyed it the most since I knew someday that bch will hikes to it's very peak that will change our lives.
I've been enjoying a lot accumulating bch recently and up until now. I've been active in noise cash and here in read.cash after I stopped it for the last two months which I regret the most now. Why? because if I weren't inactive for this platforms for 2 months and still pursuing it up until now, I would have probably many subscribers already in noise cash and read.cash which will help me accumulating more bch and I would have probably saved and hold more bch in my wallet too. It's when I realized that it really helps my friend @Zhyne06 financially and she really accumulated a lot of bch now, I really came back active to both said platforms since I was truly inspired and motivated by her knowing that cryptos like bch were dynamic and it's changes everyday and increases everyday that is why I know in the future bch will definitely changes lives to those who were hard working in saving and gaining bch and I am one of those persons now.
As I've said, I've been active to both this platforms noise cash and read.cash and I was so happy because my subscribers in both platforms increases just like in noise cash, I have there 88 subscribers and when I came back active recently I had now 124 subscribers in total which I highly appreciated the most and helps me keep going.
Also here in read.cash, I stopped this last two months with only I guess 4 subscribers and now recently when I came back I have already 10 subscribers which also makes me so happy because this 10 that was connected to me means they wanted to know my stories and I appreciate it much.
Aside from that, being interactive in both this platforms makes me more happy because I can communicates to different individuals from different places and even they don' t know me personally they were very friendly and kind which I admires a lot.
Just last night while I had my classes online, every time I had a break in my classes I've been actively interactive in noise cash and last night my set goal to accumulate $1 was being achieved and I was very happy and motivated more to set another goal.
In addition to that, I participated in the bch trivia that formulated by one of the noise cashers Mr.Trenzs, he gives 10 questions related to bch and those who can give first the answer will be given $0.1 and the 8th question was about giving 3 names of the developers team of bch. I was the second to provide answers but I won the 8th question since the first one who gave the answer weren't correct that is why I was part of the 10 winners of Mr.Trenzs game trivia.
Well, with that I was really enjoying it and felt amazing in both of this platforms because aside from browsing it, posting, commenting I can also find more friends from different places which are very kind and also hopeful and very hardworking just to reach each goals in the world of bch/bitcoin cash.
I, myself were very pleased on how this both platforms works. Here in read.cash I can express my thoughts here and shares my stories to be one of the inspiration to those who are in their downfalls which I wanted them know that not all the times we are on top because for all we knew LIFE IS LIKE A WHEEL OF FORTUNE, that is why we tried ourselves to do more just to reach our goals in life and when we reach it we should be thankful for everyday that counts in reaching it and most importantly once we are on top we should know how to share because SHARING IS CARING.
That is why, let's enjoy the thoughts and the ways were we can gain bch for now because we don't know, In the future we can already reap the fruit of our labor.
So, be HAPPY.
Teacher being a Transformer
*"A good teacher can inspire hope, ignite the imagination, and instill a love of learning." - Brad Henry*
I always believed that Teachers has the very amazing role in this world, a very noble job to be called. They put huge impact and contributes big in the minds of their students, in their student's growth socially, emotionally, physically, intellectually and spiritually. Also contributes to the future of their students which I can say, a very crucial role and job to be.
Why? because if teachers taught negativities to the student then it will radiates to them which is very painful to know, if the teachers also acts unprofessionally then still it has impact to their students there will be possibilities that students won't show respects for their selves, to the teachers and to other people since the teacher wasn't a good role model to them. That is why I can say that a teacher is very crucial, teacher must abides the code of ethics in teaching and will make sure to be the best role model towards the students so that teachers can be the good contributor towards the future lives of the students.
***TEACHER BEING A TRANSFORMER....***
Exactly. Teachers were Transformers. Transformer of lives. Transformer of the future and mostly that I can say a teacher being a transformer is that TEACHERS, transforms themselves in different characters. Teachers role is not just a teacher alone that teaches the course for the students to be learned but teachers portrays all the jobs that you can't imagine they do and beyond your imaginations. Teachers, became mother, doctor, judge, manager, assistant and many more. Definitely I must say that the teachers portrays all the roles of each job and professions. And that's one of the amazing part of being a Teacher. Another, is that a Teacher transforms inside the classroom. Teacher blends their teaching styles basing on what kind of students they are teaching and what is the age level of his/her students. Since the teacher needs to aligned the teaching strategies in every students for them to be engaged in the learning process and to have materials also that suitable for the students needs.
Based on my experienced as an online teacher for now, I've been teaching Chinese Students either kids, teens and even adults.
I just realized that being a teacher also is to be versatile the fact that I am handling or teaching different types of students and I should and must adjust my teaching style depending on what is the age level of the students. I must doing this for me to be able to delivers the lesson effectively and efficiently. And, this is the hard part of being an online teacher which based also in my experience. There is always a time that I was full of energy teaching kids just for my students not to feel bored. I acts as their level too while I'm teaching then suddenly I had this next booking after that said class and it's adult. I just felt I need to recharged my energy again and of course from being playful, cheerful and acting like kids too I suddenly turns into a serious mode teacher because of course I'm teaching adult whose age is 46. So, what do you expect I became a serious teacher within 25 minutes and then after that my next class is a kid again so therefore came back again to being playful. That is why there were times that I felt drained like my battery were totally drained after all my classes ends. But, since that's my role so I must and should bare for it.
That is why every time my class starts, beforehand I need to be ready. Ready in terms of my way of teaching or my teaching styles, ready for the materials to be used like props, visual aids and even rewards system strategies for the kids so that they won't feel bored while in the class and will have interests in the lesson and to let them engaged in the process for effectiveness as well. Because, knowing the fact that, it's very hard to catch attentions of the students especially those kids that has only a short span of attention that is why I must say being a teacher really is difficult but one is for sure is that it's very fulfilling in my part or in the teacher's part if the students appreciates your way of teaching them and they really participates well in your class. That's a very amazing feeling for me. I also felt that my efforts were paid off by the remarks of my students. And this motivates me a lot to do better and to be the best teacher I can be.
That is why, I salute to all teachers out there that doing their job to make learning effective and efficient.
Flexing my bestfriend that introduces me to this platform where I can express my thoughts and myself that I can't in person. @Zhyne06 Thanks gurlaloo ! ! !
Being the older sibling...
Have you tried to question yourself if your worth to be the ATE, or the older sister? Because they said that, when the older sibling fails to do the tasks as an ATE or fails to finished studies and became unproductive in life it will goes along to you siblings since they will look up to you and if you showed them that you were LOSER then they won't do anything or something that makes their lives different from me since they would thought about why they will strive for what is the best in them knowing that their ATE/older sibling wasn't doing it. Have you heard this kind of thoughts? Well, I always hear it from other people that is why I really tried my best to be the good role model sister to my siblings and showed them how important to finished studies and I did shown to them and I graduated college and became professional teacher. I did all of this not only for myself but for them that I may serves as their role model and they will perseveres studies and will make their lives comfortable in the future where they may somehow experience the better life or the better state of living.
I have 5 siblings 4 of them were boys .
My heart aches when I knew one of my sibling did not continue his studies where in fact he is already in his senior high school days and after he can finish that one he can somehow get better job and maybe continues to college or takes some TESDA courses for such reasonable works with reasonable salary I must say. I always convinced my siblings not to stop studying because I will help them for it as long as I can because I wanted to sees that they will live a comfortable lives knowing that we never experience that kind of life where we can get what we want and eat what we want. That is why, I really tried to be the best ATE as I can and the be able to provide them especially be able to support them in their studies because that is all I can give to them especially if I will already be working a regular as teacher. But it seems that not all of them understands me, why somehow I scolded them for not taking their studies seriously and still does not value the importance of education.
Just last year November if I'm not mistaken, our family were facing such big problem which caused by one of my brother. He was faced by a raped case. And of course as his family we tried our best not to let him be in jail his whole life because my brother is just 20 years old.
The story is like this: Why he was been charged by that kind of case? It's because ,my brother without us knowing, he had a girlfriend which is a minor I guess the girl is in it's 13 0r 14 years old. I don't really know what comes to my brother's mind why is it he had commit that kind of things like having a minor age girlfriend. Well, when it comes to love I believed also that "Age doesn't matter at all." But the sad thing there is that, my brother who is already 20 years old knows that the girl he tries to be her girlfriend and eventually became his girlfriend for almost 3 months is just our relative and my brother knows that and then he still pursued his intentions.
One evening of that in November, my mom wakes me up since I'm already sleeping that night and told me that my brother were being caught by the girl's aunt in her room and my brother was there already which means my brother enters to the girl's room by passing through the window and the one that caught them said that the girl were already no blouse and only her underwear. And yes, of course it made commotions already and my brother escapes that night, my moms said he runs and they don't know where he is. Well, just to clarify what happens was both my brother and that girl's decision since if it isn't the time my brother enters the room the girl should have shouted if she was being harassed but that doesn't happen because that girl let my brother enters her room too since they are of course girlfriend and boyfriend.
Then, to fast forward the story....
Yes, it's all a big fuss in our barrio, the parents of the girl especially the father got really angry to my brother because he points out that her daughter is just minor and also our relative too why is it my brother attempted to do such things. Of course, I understand the rants of the girl's father since me too I don't know either what's wrong with my brother's mind. With that, the side of the girl files a raped case towards my brother and their case were very strong since they had a medical certificates that says the private part of the girl has shall I say a little scratches because they've done things already that shouldn't be done like we called it, "half half sex". But there was no such intercourse happened between them only a minor scratches of the girl's private part.
That is why when the summon came, we've talked to an attorney and we asked for advice if we will make a counter affidavit of it. And the attorney said to us frankly that even if we will faced them in court we will surely fail since their affidavit were very strong and we can't do to counter it since the girl is also in her minor age. That is why the attorney advised us to just asked for forgiveness to the parents of the girl and tried to pleased them to just closed the case instead. And yes my parents did that, my brother asked for forgiveness on what he did but they will never forgiven and the parents of the girl especially the father said that he will surely let my brother be in jail for what he did to his daughter and my parents can't do anything to pleased them because every time they attempted to do so the father of the girl just ignored my parents. And with that, I felt hurt that we've done everything to just let them forgave us, forgave my brother's doing but then they can't that forgiveness. I also understand since they were the victim and that there side were a girl all I want is that at that time that they won't let the happening be just on my brother's fault just because my brother is not minor and theirs were minor since their daughter also allows everything to happen. That's all I want.
And since, my parents can't changed the mind of the girl's father to just closed the case instead. I tried to convince them myself, and as our talks goes along the father of the girl were really fixed in his decision to let my brother be in prison. That is why, I thought of money, I asked him that we will gave 100,ooopesos as counterpart of the filed case. But I was shocked with what his response, he said that the amount I said is just little and that's why I asked him how much just for him to changed his mind and then he said if we can afford to gave them 200,000 pesos the he will surely lift the case.
And with that, were thankful even if we knew that we can't afford it just to not let my brother be in jail in his whole life. That is why we lend money in return to our coconut farm or we called it "kalubian" and yes we able to let the case closed. And that 200,000pesos is now my responsibility that is why I pursues to be hired in a public school for me to be able to pay it and get the "kalubian".
I must say, that we this happening I always question myself that is it forgiveness nowadays already has value. Even we both know that we were just struggling today because of pandemic and why is it that there is no consideration where in fact I should say it's not all in my brother's fault. Why is it that they never considers that?
Also, I always asked myself, am I not a good sister for them to do such things? Why? This was a question in my mind until now. Why?
Because of what happen, our family were struggling right now that is why I'm seeking and doing every I can from home for me to somehow support my family and also my son. There were always a time that I cried in silent asking myself, Can I be able to support them also we are in the middle of pandemic too? Just recently, my father just got an operation on his eye because of cataract and I can't be able to just gave them support because my service fees in y online teaching is not that much only for my son's needs. Just so hurt, I just felt that the world is so unfair. But, I always seek and thought of positivity and tries to be strong despites problems.
I know and hoped that someday everything will be okay and God gave us problems for us to realized something and He will never gave problem that we cannot solved. Everything can be solved as long as we have faith in it and we believed in ourselves that we can do everything.
Just have FAITH.
Being immune to anti-allergy pill
I am one of those persons suffers from different kinds of allergy attacks. For you to know, I am one of those persons who has allergy. For me to avoid such allergy attacks, I maintained tablets for anti-allergy everyday and sometimes every two days. My doctor said that I should only take it for 4 months an Yes I did. But, I noticed that if I cannot take it for the maximum to 2 to 3 days I will definitely gets some attacks even if I avoided those allergens that can triggers to my attacks. And up until now, I daily take this tablet for me not to experience such attacks since when I got that attacks I felt very exhausted, I can't breath well, my whole body numbs and I can't move freely or easily since I cannot manage to do so. If you'd asked me how many times already that I had that said attacks? Well, I don't know many times but one for sure I had attacks a lot of time and every attacks is different. Different, since I noticed that every attacks I'd experienced it's getting worst every time I had it. That is why I need or it is a must for me to take the anti-allergy pill for to avoid the more worst attack if there is.
I remembered my doctor once said, that I must make sure that I'll avoid those allergens that can trigger me because the level of attacks differs and he said it's get worse every attacks and then he added, the worst part of it's attacks is that when my heartbeat stops to beat where I can't take it anymore and also the doctor added, that I should avoid that to happen since they don't have the vial injection for it if it will happen. Also, my doctor says too, that of all his patients that has allergy I am the worst one. Why? because there is not months that I'm not going to his clinic for that because once I had attacks I can't breath properly aside from that red spots that are in me whole face.
I don't know why I had this illness, where in fact I'm not rich though, and they said this kind of sickness is for rich people because they can afford it's medications if ever. But, I just thought that sickness or illness never chooses what your state of living is either rich or poor, kids or adults, boys or girls, young or old.
Why I had this? I don't know. They said my allergy is late bloomer since I started having this when I was in my 16 -17 years of age and it gets worst every time I had it's attacks.
And I must say, that I'm not ready for the very very worst attack that what my doctor said, that is when my heartbeat stops to beat. I don't know if I will still lives if that happens to me. And to be frank, I'M AFRAID OF IT.
I'M AFRAID, knowing the fact that I have a son the still needs me and I have my family that needs me too. I must say, that I will be only ready for it if I've seen family and my son stable and that maybe I will be resting peace. But as of now, I'm not that's why I make sure to maintain the anti-allergy table and even if it's hard for me to financially maintain it I always find a way of where I can have money or where can I borrow money just to buy the said pill. Since this also pill also costs a lot, and it is aching in my pocket wherein my pocket also is empty. That's why it's very hard.
Since, when I can't take the tablet even just skip it for a day, I will surely feels the symptoms of it and start attacking me. That's even if my body would feel numbed after I can take it. I'll just endure it for to avoid the worst attack.
Also, I must say that my body were already immune to this said tablet/pill since my allergy will automatically shows it's symptoms to me even just for not taking it for a day. It's symptoms will shows already the next day and in that case I started to felt bad and I felt something not good in my body which irritates me the most.
I knew, that taking medicines has side effects and I'm already ware of that and I'm ready whatever it is. I just take this since I have my son that depends in me and I need to strive and live longer in this world. Also, I still dream to see my child reaches his dreams in life and be successful. That is why I don't care if I'm immune anymore as long as I can avoid any attacks from this allergy of mine.
In addition, I always find ways to find or to earn money because of it and of course because of my son's needs. I tried to be firm or strong even sometimes I felt that I'm carrying the world in my shoulder, I still hoped for the bright future and be grateful everyday.
Since, I believed that, "God, won't give us problems that we can't solved."
So, let's be grateful everyday despites the circumstances that we had in our lives.
Everything has a reason why things happens in our lives that is why I always seek the positivity in me every time I'm in my downfall days.
Have a great day ahead!
The impact of BCH in me...
First of all, I don't know what cryptocurrency is all about. All I thought is that, it's something like a waste of time for me and it doesn't matter at all and it's only scam. That's why before, I never have the interest in knowing it, knowing how valuable is it since my mind was already firmed from the thought that it never matters and I can't earned money if I joined different platforms that gives back crypto, different kinds of crypto like bitcoin, XRP, Ethereum, lite coin, bitcoin cash and many more. I really don't appreciate all of that things at all and everything changed or shall I say my mind suddenly changed. From knowing that it doesn't matter and I can't make earnings through it, it changed from the thought of something that is very valuable and does matter at all.
**FLASHBACK...**
When I was in my 3rd year in college, I meet this friend of mine now or shall I say my bestfriend now. She's my classmate in college and we start accompanying each other when we were in 3rd year. Why did I mention this friend? Because, she told me to mention her in this article. Just kidding. Anyway, I mention this friend of mine @Zhyne06 because she's the one who introduces me the world of cryptocurrency. The value of cryptocurrency and the different platforms where I can earn crypto. She opens my mind to how valuable cryptocurrency is. Therefore, when I was 3rd year I started earning crypto even in just a little and what I appreciate her the most is she's very hardworking in terms of joining different sites, platforms and others that would give cryptos and every time she had new earning sites or anything that really is legit in giving payments, she never fails of telling me what is it. With that, I somehow understand and seen the emerging cryptocurrencies and it's value to peso.
@Zhyne06 gurl, here it is.....
**And this last two months....**
This said friend of mine again, introduces the this two platforms that gives bch. These are the noise cash and the read.cash. I'm really amazed by this two since it is very legit and I really earn bch from it. I've been active for it two months ago and suddenly my interests just worn out and I did stop posting articles here in read.cash and stop being active also in noise cash.
Then just recently, this friend of mine told me to be active again since it really gives her a lot of bch or she earned already a lot of bch from it. And what triggers me to get back again posting here in read.cash and be active in noise cash is that I've seen her earnings which somehow keep me inspired to work for it again.
And YES, I really did. I'm avtive again to both platforms and YES, it really made me realized one thing. That is, the thought that "I wish I weren't stop active to it specially here in red.cash that truly amazed me, I wish I never stop posting articles here, for I know I would have lots of subscriber now and maybe somehow I will have sponsors too already just like my friend and earn more bch already".
That was my realization until now, but still I'm very positive on things and I always believe that so called TIMING or the RIGHT TIME FOR EVERYTHING.
And also, I am very happy and pleased to getting active again in noise cash too since I received there lots of tips and that somehow inspired me to still keep going and here also in read.cash I'm more grateful that random rewarder still noticed my articles and I was in awe to know that it still upvoted my articles.
I just felt blessed everyday, despites sometimes I felt that negativities in me but I always fought for it to not dominate my whole soul so that I will only attracts the positivity in life.
And regarding BCH, I'm really into it right now because I know in the future or someday this BCH will bring changes in my state of living maybe or it will creates greater impact in my life. I just felt it and hopefully it attracts to me.
Lastly, I always believed in the thought, " God is always giving us the right time and place for everything and let's just wait for it to happen by doing the best we can to achieved our goals in life and not just to wait for it alone".
Since, every goals needs actions.
Long live BCH.
I felt exhausted... but determined
Have you experienced the thought of quitting? The thought that you can no longer continue living?
Quitting, in a way that you thought of being cursed because of the situation that happens in your life wherein in the first place you never expected it because you set the highest expectations in life which make your lives comfortable and away from any stresses and then suddenly in just a blink everything change and that expectations, or that said highest expectations that you set in your life just fall down and then unexpected happens instead of the expected ones.
And since unexpected happens, eventually I started embracing it and tried to live for it. Since, I made it to myself that's why it's my responsibility to accept whatever it's consequences.
**I am a full time mother to my very cute son. I will definitely love my own.**
And since, my partner is still a student and don't have a job. That's why I did everything I can to seek for a job for us to raise well our kid and to gave everything he needs. Since, I'm already a professional Teacher and still on my way of processing my application in a public school, I applied first to some online job and that is to teach online since there are lots of online teaching platform nowadays that you earn money while teaching at home or the so called Homebased Online Teaching.
And lucky for me, I was being hired to one of the ESL company that teaches online which somehow helped me earn money and can able to give financial support to my kid.
That is why there are lots of time that I somehow surrender since if I got fully booked I worked at night at 5-6 hours continuously on weekdays and the whole day of weekend. And, we knew that facing the whole time in a computer is very tiring and there are lots of times that I felt sleepy while doing a class and worst is I got slept while teaching to the point that I already talks nonsense and out of the blue explanations and words that I accidentally said to my students which is not in the lesson. And this happens because I'm already not in my pace since I felt very sleepy.
Then, I usually sleep late and will get up early since my son gets up early. So, I need to get up early too.
Also, there were lots of times that I cried in silent that no one knows I cried even my partner for the thought that, what I will have low bookings in my online teaching job, what should I do to give the needs of my sons, his daily needs.
That's why, up until now I'm still seeking for more works online that I somehow can make earning from it while at home.
Therefore, even there are lots of days that I felt very tired and exhausted, still I make sure to myself that I will not it to dominate in me because I have a son that needs me, my love, my care and my support.
That is why, despites that, I always think of my son every time I felt exhausted because it's the only way I felt DETERMINED and still continues FIGHTING.
#theSPIRITofBeingAmother
Hard work is what matters most...
HARD WORK ! ! !
Well, a big word and a big responsibility to take. Hard work. This is some how the beginning of everything where dreams needs to be fulfill.
Hard work. It is the tasks that we must have done in achieving our goals in life and this is the stepping stone of everything that we need to have in our life. Being a hard worker individual.
Being intelligent without hard work is just like a piece of joke. Joke? in a sense that intelligence will be left behind if there is no hard work in it. If there is no perseverance in everything you do in achieving your dreams. Everything entails hard work and everyone is need to be a hard worker person to reach the peak of everyone's dreams.
And in my case, as a MOTHER.....
I always thought of everything that can open me opportunities or give me opportunities to be sustainable in a way that I can provide the needs of my son and for everything relevant to my son. I realized that there are lots of opportunities that are open for me where I can earn money even just a little penny at least in a day I won't be zero. Therefore, in that realization I seeks different works online that I can do as homebased work. And yes, I did. I was hired in a particular ESL company and teach English online to foreign students. This kind of work is tough for me since I mostly teach at night since that was the peak hours of my students and every time I had my class at nigh starting at 6:00PM I always feel sleepy and sometimes I somehow slept while teaching ang just realized when my student calls my name. This made me thought of HARD WORK.
That I need to be awake and energized at night since I had this goal in me to provide something to my son. That is why even if I'm very sleepy, I will not let it dominates me because I need to earn and I had someone that needs my support specifically financial support. And for my son I will do everything even if I felt tired so much in my daily routine, still I always thought of my son and that would help me keep motivated in my daily battles.
Everything matters in life but HARD WORK is the one that most matters specially if there are people, family and loved ones that needs your support. And also aside from my son I have a family that needs me and it's my responsibility to give back to them what they did for me and became what I am today.
As of now, being hard worker is my first or utmost needs to still find more and more ways for me to seek the suitable work for me that can sustain my family's needs.
Along with this, is of course I always seek for guidance, enlightenment and light to our creator that He will always taught me the right way to reach the dream that I wanted not only for myself but also to my family, loved ones and most especially to my son.
Also, everything that happens in our life has purpose. Purpose that we must be grateful of and a purpose that must be taken into responsibility.
HARD WORK?
Well, that is my stepping stone and the start of fulfilment towards my goals and dreams in life.
I'm back here..... and it's good to be back.
I'm back here..... and it's good to be back.
The hardship of seeking a job...
Everyone of us wanted to have a stable job in the future where we can be able to buy what we want and need and most importantly for us to be ready in case we already planning to have a family. Also we aimed to have a job that gave us wages that is suitable for us and sometimes that is bigger wages that we expected to have.
As what I also observed, even others also continue finding a job even though they were already employed for the thought of having much higher salary rate.
But as first time job seeker, I may say there were lots of things to be consider and must be done according to what job are we applying for. And in this case, the HARDSHIP is being realized.
HARDSHIP? from the reality that there are lots of qualifications that we need to attained in order for us to be hired in such desired job we are applying for. And the sad thing there, is that if we don't have that qualification even just one of that qualification then never expect for a call from the agencies were we sent our application letter. Your application is seems to be like nothing to them. That's the sad part of being a job seeker.
One scenario is when we are applying for a government institution like applying as a teacher. There were lots of papers/documents that need for us accomplish, certificates that we need in order for us to credit some points for ranking and made to be one of the registered qualified applicants. And take note, all of this needs money for us to have all the requirements needed to be qualified. That's why this somehow hard for us as first time job seekers.
Based on my experienced, I graduated college last 2019 and still unemployed. I've been crazy finding job online but sad to say if there is an online job it needs more and more time for you to earn and that sucks since you already spent a lot for buying loads in order to have internet data and then it will not be paid back. Your effort seems to be wasted in this kind of scenario.
There is also a job hiring but its so far from my home and I can't be able to grab it since I can't leave my kid behind. Its hard, so hard the fact that you need to think more on what to prioritized and what are not. This is somehow the struggles of being a mom specially if your kid still a toddler and needs your hands on care and you cannot easily left them to someone even to your parents because it is my responsibility as a mother.
Another thing is that, the hardship of dividing your time and managing it. Since we knew that a mother is like a machine that has lots of works to be done inside and outside your peripheral.
BUT, despites all this we as jobseekers never stop seeking for what we aimed for. There must have patience in us, we must be perseverance in every aspects within us. For I know, there were just perfect time for us to meet our goals in life.
They say, "In God's perfect time."
A Mother's Endless LOVE....
MOTHER? Well, that is the word that made all of us exists in this world. We may not be able to see the beauty of nature if it isn't because of our MOTHER.
I shall say that a MOTHER is the most versatile woman since they all do works and responsibilities beyond their capacity to do work especially in terms of caring a family and mostly raising a kid to what they will to become as an individual.
A Mother's LOVE..... is the most genuine love of all and it's limitless. Even though they were being left behind, treated like they never existed in the eyes of others. The worst is that they were somehow unvalued by their own sons/daughters. But still, a Mother's Love never fades and continue to rise even by all negative circumstances they went through by the people/persons they loved.
I, as daughter, I will not deny that sometimes I argued back to my mother especially if I heard a lot of badmouthing by her and cannot control myself for not arguing back.
When I was in my teenage days, my mother always put limitations on my actions especially on going outside with friends and meeting guys. I remembered that she were very strict to me that times which irritates and annoys me. That time , I still don't understand the reason why my mom did that to me, where in fact I knew already what to do on what is right and not. Since, my mind at that time is still immature I say, I never understand of why my mother limits me on such that I had fun doing. Because of that, I thought of my mom as heartless mother where in fact its not. I thought of her as a very strict mom, when I know that she just being strict for me to be disciplined well and became a better individual. I thought that my mother were just being overacting of her actions towards me. I thought all of that towards my mother not knowing what her intentions of doing that to me. In some instance, I hated my mom. I hated her, for I thought that she never loves me instead.
But, I realized all of that when I was already in her situation, being a mother. I realized that, she were right on her actions, she were right for being strict towards me in order for me to be a better person. I also realized that I was wrong for saying that she never loves me before instead that she totally loves me because she did things that is right for me.
I feel sorry until now for what I thought of my mother before.... Because that genuine LOVE of a Mother never fades but rather boosted everyday.
When I got sick and been attacked by my allergy, my mother is there for me caring me and giving me medicine for me to get well. When I needed money for my school activities or some school fees, my mother were there ready to gave me what I want. When I got hospitalized due to dengue, my mother were the one who find ways for me to get better especially by staying with me in the hospital and not even sleeping because she just guarding me all the time. Then many more..... my MOTHER were always there in every ups and downs in my life especially when that dark day that came with me is when I got crazy the whole. My mother never stops caring and loving me ever since I came out from her and existed to this world. NEVER!!!
That's why, I was sorry for everything I thought to my mother before and I tried to compensate everything for now until my last breath I will always let my MOTHER feel the love that a daughter can gave because she gave me her genuine LOVE then I gave mine too.
Toddler's SMILE: A genuine smile
Every smile connotes meaning... We knew that not all smiles were TRUE, most of it were just FAKE. We cannot say that the person that smiled at us were true, maybe they just smile for nothing, or maybe they smile just to please us.
But, I must say the best smile that I've ever seen and I knew it was the truest smile, a genuine smile and of course the cutest smile is the smile of a toddler and a baby. It felt heaven once you see your kid smiling at you as if they made your day complete.
When we see a toddler or a baby, we cannot deny the fact that we felt happy especially if we can let them smile and chuckles. Once they did that, we were like rising towards heaven and we can definitely forget all our worries, problems and even our debt once we've seen such beautiful and lovable smile from a kid.
In my case, I am very blessed that God had already given me my own toddler's smile. I mean, He gave me already a kid, a kid that fades all away my problems once he showed smiled at me and gave chill feeling once they laughed together with me.
I know, these are somehow the dream of most woman, is to have their own kid that would makes they're day complete . Just like me, I'm already a mother with a 1 year old kid, I always let my kid smile and made him laughed because his laughter and smile can somehow eased the pain the I felt, forgets my worries and my stress reliever. That's why, I'm super blessed that I had someone in me, that will make my day complete because honestly it is hard for us mother to be separated with our kid even just for an hour. Why??? Its because, we will miss there company, their play hobbies and of course their laughter and smile.
Sometimes, if we already have a kid, we cannot take away that sometimes they weren't in their mood... not all the times that they smiles and laughed, they also cried and cried a lot. Once a kid cried for some reasons that they never get what they want, they definite cried a lot and aloud. This may annoy me, and sometimes I get angry towards my kid since I don't know how to let him stop from crying. I even sometimes prepare a stick of wood for him to listen and stop from crying but this isn't effective since he even cried loudly. Because of this, I just laugh at myself.
But after all of that, it never exceeded the happiness that I felt once my kid already in his mood and mostly while he is in mood, he makes me feel very very happy and fades all my stress out .
Again, a toddler's smile is always a genuine smile.
Allergy strikes...The tiring moment of my life...
According to ascia, Allergy occurs when a person reacts to substances in the environment that are harmless to most people. These substances are known as **allergens** and are found in dust mites, pets, pollen, insects, ticks, molds, foods and some medications.
And this kind of thing really hassled me every time I got attacked by my allergy. I guess almost all of the factors like all the allergens can definitely triggered my allergy. Why do I have this kind of disease?
Well, this starts when I was already in college. According to my doctor that I had the so called late bloomer allergy since it appears in my when I was already in my first year in college.
This all starts when I joined a training to become an ROTC officer in our school. I was hospitalized by then due to cough that lasts for a month and it end up to the point that I have the hardship in breathing. Therefore, my parents decided to brought me in a hospital.
So, few days in the hospital I noticed that there are lots of red spots in my body especially in my face. And once all of the red spots came out I feel dizzy, I had a very high fever since I felt that the res spots that came out are so hot that's why I had very high fever.
So, after that I was diagnosed already that I have allergy to to those foods like seafoods except fish, to some vegetables that are hairy, bad smells, and to dust, vehicle smokes. All of that were my allergens, and the most allergen to me is seafoods that once I eat some of it few minutes later I got attacked by my allergy.
The worst thing is that when I had the allergy, I feel tired, I can't breath properly, there's a lot of itchy things I felt in my throat, my nose, my eyes, my ears and even my nails were aching.
That's why sometimes, when I had it I can asked God, why me??? Why do I have this kind of disease that makes me feel uncomfortable and gave lots of limits to the foods that I wanted to eat. I'm not rich though, that I can buy the viand that is only necessary to me. Sometimes I asked Him, What if your just going to take me instead because there were lots of time that I get dehydrated due to vomiting and stomach ache. The worst attacked for me is when I felt my stomach were being punched and I vomit in every minute it will just stop once all the red spots came out. That's why, I will not take my medicine immediately because I wanted that all the red spots will come out first so that I will feel better. Since I will be okay once there will already red spots came out.
My doctor already gave me a medicine, an anti allergy medicine with the highest dose, and I take it daily already for now. I don't know maybe I got immune already by the medicine because even if I don't eat those foods that can trigger my allergy, still it appears once I can't take medicine for just one day. That's why, I always take it from now to avoid it from attacking.
There's one thing that my doctor told me, which scares me a lot until now....
He said, that there were such times that I will got the worst allergy attacked its when my heartbeat stops. This statement from my doctor afraid me a lot until now. I'm afraid that what if this comes, what should I do? Is this the end of my existence?
This definitely ruined my mind ever time I got attacked, I'm AFRAID.
Not afraid to die, but I'm afraid that I can't see my kid grown up as a good individual, be a professional and have also a family... I'm still not ready to leave my child behind. This is what afraid me so much.
I'm just hoping and praying that this won't come or this won't happen to me.
I always believe that God won't gave us problem, challenges and circumstances that we cannot surpass. It's a matter of faith in Him and trusting His will.
How Read.cash amazed me??
Jus WOW!!!
This is the feeling I felt right now when I've seen my account productive. Productive in a way that there's a lot of individuals who upvoted my articles.
Why I said read.cash amazed me?
It's because, I've been finding for free online platforms that gave cash and I had a lot of sites, apps and other online platforms been to and I wasn't able to get an amount that I have got here on read.cash even just for two days.
In my other sites and apps, I waited for weeks, months and worst even a year for me to get paid. Also, most of it had limited amount for you to withdraw, unlike here on read.cash that there is no limit amount to withdraw. Also it takes a lot of time for me to meet that limit amount to be withdrawn. And that makes me feel tired sometimes in waiting the time when I can withdraw the said amount. But all of this fades when I started this read. cash. I must say, I found the right online platforms that really gave cash and take note in BCH which amazed me more. Then lastly, I can express here what I really feel through writing and this will also enhance my communication skills, more so my writing skills.
Just an awe feeling when I visit my account here that there are lots of upvoters who gave payments in my articles even though I'm that really good in English maybe somehow there were some grammatical errors in my articles. But still I'm very thankful for this is such a blessing for especially now that I'm still unemployed. This kind of platform may somehow help me to have some cash for me to get if I need to buy needs for my 1 year old kid.
Well, I've been thinking to publish more but the problem is my English is just limited... hahahahahaha
Overall, this read.cash is sooooo WOOOOOOWWWWW !!!
The struggles of being a First Mom....How will I face motherhood???
MOTHERHOOD.... Well this is the thing that all women wanted to be. To be a mother.
But the question is, Are we ready to become a mother? How can we adjust from that phase of life, the motherhood? Are we stable enough to raise a kid? Those are just some questions that we may asked to ourselves before we enter motherhood. But...
In my case, all that question never appears on my mind since I promise to myself that I will only enter motherhood once everything I dreamed to become to myself and to my family will already be on the table. In other words, my dream for myself and for my family will not be only a dream but already a reality.
But then suddenly, in any circumstances everything I wanted to be and expected to become were just like a dust that fades away once cleaned. Why??? well this is it....
I was on my 4th year of college at that time, then before the graduation that was last May 2019, I found out that I was already pregnant. At first, I was nervous knowing that I will not be able to gave my family the state of living that I wanted them to have since we are just a poor family and of course I wanted everything to change at least I could let them feel the life that is somehow uplifting the poverty that we experienced. And because I don't want my parents to get disappointed in me, I did not told them my situation that time only I and my boyfriend knows until I graduated college. Then, since I wanted to show my parents that I want to have work already after I graduated, I applied for a teaching job to some private schools since I was graduated with an education course. Then, lucky for me I got a job that time...
My parents still don't know my current situation, until such time that I quitted my job for some health issues, since I have allergy and they said that once we are pregnant we are very vulnerable and my allergy that time attacked me weekly and I always get absent because of it. That's why I was forced to quit my job and that time I already have courage to tell my parents the truth and luckily my parents never said bad things to me rather they heartily accepted my situation and cared for me until I gave birth for my first baby.
All my worries about my parents that they may be get disappointed in me for what happen fades since they never let me feel that they were disappointed. That's why after I gave birth, I have lots of adjustments made like my actions were already limited because I already have a kid to take care of...
Everything changes once we already have a kid and that changes needs time for us first mom to accept and adapt it to ourselves. This time I felt hurt since I don't have work and my partner is also still a student, the hardship of raising a kid is there. The worries that I cannot gave the things that my kid wanted like their diapers, their milk and other that they need. The fear that I may not be able to gave the best for my baby. That's why for now, I'm really persevere to seek for a stable job for my kid and to continue my dream to my family to gave them a better living.
Because I wasn't equipped to become a mother since it was unexpected, I always asked myself... HOW WILL I FACE MOTHERHOOD?? despites the fact that I don't have anything specially on financial thing.
But, I still tried and strived for it. The important thing for me is that I can take good care for my kid no matter what together with my partner. We now faced the outcomes of our actions. An action that's only thinking for ourselves and not thinking of what will happen afterwards.
Therefore, my lesson for this is that.....
"THINK FIRST BEFORE ANYTHING ELSE."
@Janz
