Life Is Tough, Be Tougher

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Avatar for Jane
Written by
2 years ago

September 9, 2022

I was reading Milly's article on another platform where she mentioned about tough life and her plan to visit her parents. All of a sudden, I felt sadness in my heart and I miss my parents so much. It's been five years that I haven't seen them personally and only through chat and video calls on Messenger are our ways of keeping connected, giving updates and news. And sometimes, I am even more busy blogging than talking with them on weekends.

I was at the age of 15 when I became independent and lived away from my family. That was when I studied in college and since my school was located in a city that is almost 50 kilometers away from home, I opted to live in the city to save for fares and to avoid traffic jams that often consumed a lot of my time in traveling. It may not be far like how you define distance, but it was my first time living alone without them and away from home.

Struggles are real in the beginning as I have to adjust to the place, as well as the people in the boarding house. I dealt with different lodgers with different personalities from different hometowns. And for an introverted person like me, it was truly tough to socialize with roommates with whom I didn't even know if could be trusted.

During my first days and nights, I wasn't comfortable and I couldn't sleep well. A lot of emotions were mixing and bothering my mind. Oftentimes, I just want the night to slip too fast so that I could go to school and be with classmates whom I was more comfortable with. The same with the day that I don't want to end too soon.

But as time went by, I started to feel a sense of real independence and freedom. Along with it was becoming more mature, not just in mind, but in all aspects. I was living in a new place with new faces so all I could trust was myself alone. I had to deal with different things, that include budgeting my money so it would last until my next allowance. Sometimes it doesn't, so I needed to go on an unanticipated diet and tighter budgeting.

At the end of the day, all I learned was about tough life, in which I need to be tougher. Those experiences were the same as when I ventured into a bigger city, the capital of my country where I experienced and perceived more about life, conquered more challenges, strengthened my faith, and learned to stand on my two feet alone when conquering the storms of life.

There were days and nights when I felt too lonely and alone. Anxiety kicked in many times and even thought of ending my life as I felt like it was a failure, and I wasn't good enough to be accepted by the companies I applied for and applications abroad have no progress. But still, my fear of God and death took over my conscience and I managed to deal with my anxiety.

As I ventured out farther and went overseas, that's when I saw another face of life, tougher than the toughest, and I became a conqueror in a foreign land where I was uncertain of what lies ahead of my journey. Life becomes more toxic here, along with the work and negative people around. It triggers my anxiety more easily and it kept going and coming, especially during the darkest hours and toughest days.

Again, there were times that I want to let go of the faith I was holding as I felt like, life is too unfair for those who sacrifice their own lives for the sake of other people. Compromising their own well-being just to see their loved ones happy and getting the support they need. But at the end of the day, all I get is exhaustion because of working for other people.

However, things get better when I learned to deal with negativity and toxic work here abroad. It seems that I have been vaccinated and become immune to life's toxicity. The good side here is that I felt real freedom and a sense of better independence that no havoc of life could turn me down again, and I was able to conquer a lot of storms.

Stronger, resilient, and persevering person, that's how I was formed by the challenges in the past. And wherever I go, I would carry them along with me so I won't fall easily. These all happened when I become independent and did not rely on my parent's pockets. Although I missed them so much, I am always grateful for them for allowing me to get the freedom I needed and experience real independent life. Apart from it is the chance to wonder and wander and see more beautiful places, experience other cultures, and become a better individual.


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Written by
2 years ago

Comments

Our experiences either make or break us. In your case, it made you :) You must be proud of yourself as you look back at how you have become :)

$ 0.00
2 years ago

Life keeps getting tougher and it is the strongest that scale through. I admired your resilient act too. It's not easy being away from home and still could fight to overcome some life's hurdles. May God continue to keep you till you finally go to visit your family again.

$ 0.02
2 years ago

Gosh you're just 15 when you started to live as an independent woman, I'm so amazed by your courage sis, I can't imagine my 15 year old self away from my family, even eating alone at my age until now makes me uncomfortable, but now I'm trying to be dependent on myself, life is tough so as we should also be.

$ 0.02
2 years ago

We need to be independent as young as possible.. We can't rely on our parents the whole life. Real challenges start when we stand on our own feet.

$ 0.00
2 years ago

Indeed. Life is tough but we have to be tougher. Resiliency, finding solutions, coping mechanism are some of the things that should be encouraged, nurtured and developed.

$ 0.01
2 years ago

Wow! You're so brave at an early age. Naging independent lang ako nung meron na akong work na may enough na sweldo.

$ 0.00
2 years ago

I love the way you see life my dear friend :). Congratulations on overcoming the 2000 followers barrier!

$ 0.00
2 years ago

You lived away from your family at the age of 15? That's very young 😮 But in a way I see it as a good thing, it is part of what made you who you are today. The tougher the journey, the stronger we become as time goes on

$ 0.01
2 years ago

Well that's because I need to study in the city.. That's how I became independent

$ 0.00
2 years ago

15? Wow. The struggles are real...life isn't getting easier my dear and we just have to keep pushing. People at early age now understand what hustle and grinding is...it shows how a lot of things have changed and they don't get easier. We just have to keep pushing. Only the tough can push through this life...

$ 0.02
2 years ago

Thank you.. It's because of past experiences that we become tougher today

$ 0.01
2 years ago

That's right...they make us stronger, wiser and tougher...

$ 0.00
2 years ago

Its sad to think that sometimes we need to setaside our life for the sake of our family.. But if am in that case maybe I can do both achieving my dreams while supporting my family. Sabi nga nila pag - gusto magagawan at magagawan ng paraan yan..

$ 0.00
2 years ago

Life is really tough, but we have to be tougher. When I am not used to a place, I feel alone. But through time, I get to familiarize with the place.

$ 0.01
2 years ago

life is too unfair for those who sacrifice their own lives for the sake of other people.

sapul na sapul ate, kamakailan ko lang rin natutunan na di ko dapat sinasacrifice self ko para sa iba, like di ko mahanap ung happiness kasi puro sila ung inuuna ko. ang sakit nun na halos ikaw uunahin mo iba tas pagdating sayo ang dami mong tanong

$ 0.02
2 years ago

No choice rin naman lalo na kung ikaw lang aasahan

$ 0.00
2 years ago

Life is indeed tough and we have no any other choice but to be tougher just to survive. I've been in the same shoe as you, however more tougher because the first country I went was a hot country but it was as cold as the bar of jail. People around me has no any kind of consideration about my feelings. I can't even talk to my family, not even allowed to see the outside. I felt that I become a prisoner because I had dreams and goals. No visiting hours and no freedom to express my self as for them they own me and they can decide everything about me. I really felt so hopeless and felt the bitterness of life, but I am grateful that God still allow me to get out and give me my freedom after all and I realized, life is tough and we have to be tougher.

$ 0.03
2 years ago

Sa Saudi ka? Mas mahirap nga buhay nun..hndi mkalabas.

$ 0.00
2 years ago

Oo, sobrang hirap dun pero madami pa din naman ang nagtatagal dun. Nasasanay nalang, tsaka depende din kasi sa amo. Yung mga amo ko sobrang estrikto kaya wala talaga akong freedom dun.

$ 0.00
2 years ago

Grabe d ko kaya yun..dto nga every week ako off..pero kulang parn

$ 0.00
2 years ago

Naging strong and independent ka sis dahil sa mga napagdaanan mo. You are brave enough to conquer all those trials and anxiety. Natry ko na din nagtrabaho when I was in my teen years at malayo sa family ko. Mahirap magkasakit Lalo na pag mag isa ka lang. Yung kahit my sakit ka need mo pa rin pumasok sa work.

$ 0.01
2 years ago

Mas mahirap yung nagwowork while studying

$ 0.00
2 years ago

Mahirap nga Yun sis

$ 0.00
2 years ago

I also experienced living far away from my parents, it difficult and I will be honest I regret it sometimes however, I think the reason for being away is thag for me to become tough and independent, being the youngest make it hard for me to live alone as I am dependent with my family but those years helped me to rely on myself. And it also helped me move closer to God which made my regrets blow away

$ 0.02
2 years ago

Naging close dn ako kay God sa mga panahon na yun.

$ 0.00
2 years ago

Omg, you are such an adventurous girl with a lot of multitasking personalities. I can feel you, it's not easy to leave your hometown, parents, and siblings but one has to do it to achieve something in their life and I am sure somewhere your parents are proud of you jane.

Love to read about your thoughts, Indeed you are a fighter in this challenging era, and Wish you will achieve more in your upcoming time. Much love, ❤️ Let's dream, live, and achieve.

$ 0.00
2 years ago

Super relate miss Jane. I am sensitive person also. Dali ko malungkot. Dali ko umiyak kaya when I was in my first year in college super hirap. Huhu iyak lang ako ng iyak sa boarding house pag wala akong class dahil sobrang nakakapanibago tas sobrang miss ko na agad family ko. Yung gusto ka umuwi.

$ 0.01
2 years ago

Ganun ako nsa Manila ako

$ 0.00
2 years ago

Sa Manila ka pala nag aral miss Jane. Super nakakalungkot talaga pag first time. Manibago ka.

$ 0.00
2 years ago

So you got independent at the age of fifteen. That's a lot. I pray that the Lord blesses your hustle. I'm glad you conquered your fears

$ 0.00
2 years ago

You are indeed a conqueror✨ Many people admire you because you've done a lot to yourselves and that is enough to prove yourself that you are a victorious.

$ 0.01
2 years ago

Thank you

$ 0.00
2 years ago

I am glad you learned to conquer your fears, seriously it wouldn't be easy for you to stay away from your family for five years.

$ 0.01
2 years ago

And counting 😉

$ 0.00
2 years ago