Good day everyone I've been so busy this day because I am trying to find another topic for my another research paper. The reason behind this is that my first one that I've is rejected by my teacher because she said that the research was too broad and she is not sure if I am able to do it.

I sent that paper for consultation a few weeks ago and she just replied yesterday that's why I am now and panic to think of the new research topic and title because I am already done with the Chapter 1 and 2 of my first research because she didn't reply and I thought it was already all right. But she praised about the interesting topic that I want to research with she just said that is too broad to conduct right now especially it is still a pandemic. I just don't know where to start right now because I spent a lot of my time in my first research I read a lot journal and articles related to that topic. I even watched a lot videos that explains that topics and I also reads a lot for that topic. I've been doing that for almost 3-4 weeks now. I don't know if I am able to pass it because I only have less than 5 days for me to submit that and at this point I am in still in the blank state. Plus I also have plans this following Saturday and Sunday I don't know if I am able to finish this but I will try.

Supposedly a Group Report

This morning I experienced a pretty embarrassing I guess and nerve wracking hour. This morning we are supposedly going to report about our topic in that one subject. We are all divided into groups a long time ago and we are going to present the topic given to us at certain time. We are the last group that will be presenting because the grouping is based on Surname. My group is actually a pretty nice because our leader just give us the topic and we will submit a contents of the power point to her then we will report each topic invididually.

The part that was given to me is the 2nd to the last part of our topic. We are 5 in the group that's why we have around 10-15 minutes each to explain our own part. I was expecting the it will go smoothly because we are the last group among our class and it's the last week of reporting already. But this kind of event happened our leader chat in our group chat that she won't be able to present this morning because of some personal reason that I don't want to disclose because of her personal privacy.

But I didn't really think of this much because I thought one of us can just cover her topic and if anyone won't do it I will just do it for myself. Then this morning I just joined the class and I saw that only me and my other group mate is present into the meeting. He must also noticed that's why he also left immediately I was in panic that time because I am the only member of the group that is present. And my teacher said when the first reporting happened no matter what how many are you,the reporting must happened because it's a waste of time if there's reporting happened and she won't give another chance for us to report.

When my teacher gave a sign that the reporting can start already I inform her that I am the only one present and she asked me if I still want to present because she won't give another chance next week. That's why I just said yes and I am very nervous at that time because I am scared of this kind of activities like speaking in class then this kind of thing also happened I don't know what to do anymore. Good thing she agreed to my request that I won't open my camera because I am very nervous that time and if I am open cam I will feel more pressured.

Good thing is that I studied all of this topic even though it wasn't assign to me to that's why I know we what I am talking about. I talked about the topics for almost 40-50 minutes by myself I even give some examples and facts about it. While I am presenting I am seeing a lot of chat of my classmates mentioning my group mates because I am reporting all alone. That's why I mute my notifications because I am more distracted by it. I am very nervous at that time while I was reporting that my English speaking starting to fail while I am talking. I really want to just leave the meeting but I can't I have to finish all of this topics by myself.

After a long period of talking and explaining our topic I finally finished it. Then my teacher praised me a little because I managed to "explain it well" according to her and even though she sense that I was nervous the whole time she said that I done a pretty good job. Then the this question happened and the is if I will include my teammates into the grade of the report. This question is being asked every after a report when there's a group member that wasn't present during the presentation but my situation is different because I am the only one present. I just said yes to her question which she looks pretty surprised when I answered it because I think she is thinking that I might say no.

Then my teacher asked me why I just said my group mates might have some personal reasons that's why there aren't able to attend but personally I feel kinda hurt that I am the only one that present it all but I didn't say it to my teacher. Since I am a special case this is the thing that my teacher do she gave a mark according to my presentation which is 94 while the rest of my members will get the grade of 85 because I said yes to her question.

After this class I feel so tired and my energy ran out that's why when the noon comes I just fall asleep then eat my lunch at 3 pm.

Lead image is from @ Surface in Unsplash

Author's Note:

Thank you for reading this article. I just want to inform you that I might be not able to online or active that much this past few days because I need to finish my research paper. That's why I am apologising in advance I hope you understand. Have fun and stay safe everyone.

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