Fire in the kitchen 2

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Avatar for HappyBoy
2 years ago

Grab your pen and paper let's go on another cooking course with your one and only "Chef Valour". With my apron tied and my imaginary long curls wrapped in a cap, a spoon in hand and a pose of a "Messi in the kitchen", I bring to you another disaster-class in the kitchen. Today's teaching won't be done by myself alone. My partner in crime, a worse cook than I, will be supporting me. It's no other person than my big bro "Josiah"

A few years back we celebrated Christmas and my sister was the one in charge of cooking. She spent hours cooking the various delicacies with no help from me and my brother. A friend was around to help her but she was agitated that we refused to help even though we all are eating the food together.

We kept on abusing her, calling her "Lazy bone" and asking her if that's how she will complain in her husband's house when she finally ties the knot. It was time to eat and right there in the dining, she started complaining again. My Dad who doesn't condone any disrespect was agitated by the words he heard we spoke to her. He started chastising us and we were embarrassed right in front of her friend. A big spoiler. Because I've been trying so hard to catch her friend's attention.

To avenge the embarrassment, after the meal we complain that the food wasn't well cooked. I went on to start pretending as if I'm purging. We said so many nasty words just to make her sad and we got what we wanted when she started crying. We didn't know that was our biggest mistake.

On the first of January, seven days after the clash with my sister. We were outside sitting like Kings, waiting for our meal when I heard "Giddy and Jossy come to the kitchen" that was my mum calling us. With happiness, we rushed to the kitchen but saw fresh pepper, uncooked turkey, rice and other kinds of stuff on two different cabinets. My Dad came in and said we will cook our meal that day, while my Mum, my sister and other visiting ladies will cook for the whole house.

Josiah started protesting, but being the stubborn one- I said "No problem, we will surprise you all". Josiah looked at me as if I was a mad man standing in front of him and gave me one of his "you must be out of your mind" look. I shrug and got to work. Maybe this can help me score a point in front of my sister's friend.

Off to YouTube, I go. But everything looked like magic to me. My sister and her friends kept giggling and whispering to each other. "You guys will see Chef Valour at work today," I said to myself.

I don't know how to describe the cooking style I used. It isn't my fault sincerely. I followed all the procedures given by the YouTuber but the rice was burning even before it got soft. I added more water and "Assistant Chef J," asked me to add oil. According to him-oil makes it soft and also prevent burning.

I did as instructed. We went out to relax a bit while we wait for our "Italian restaurant-worthy dish" to be ready.

The shout of "Gideonnnnnnnnn" was blaring through the whole building.

"They are feeling it already. I'm sure the aroma of our meal is irresistible. They want to beg for a taste" I said within myself.

"Gideon and Josiah come here!" This sounded more serious because it was the voice of my Dad.

We ran quickly to the kitchen but we were welcomed with a smoke-filled kitchen. Everyone was coughing and covering their nose. My sister came in with the fire extinguisher but before she could use it, my mum put out the fire. I stood rooted to a spot looking at the pot of rice that is now black.

"Bon appetite Giddy et Jossy" my sister whispered laughing.

The embarrassment was too much. The whole extended family was there. My cousins, nephews, nieces, uncles and other relatives. They all started laughing and guess the most annoying part. My crush was laughing too.

"Go and clear the mess you created," my dad said in between laughter.

We poured the rice away and I tried to eat the Turkey, but a single bite was enough for me to know that we were saved from further embarrassment by the burnt rice. If it had not burned, everyone would have tasted our meal and they will know that it's total nonsense.

"This is a blessing in disguise" I whispered to Josiah and he started laughing, having understood the meaning of the statement.

What to eat was the next problem. We went to our room and I resigned to either take Cornflakes cassava flakes. At least that requires no stress. But my Lovely Mum came in and said she has pleaded on our behalf. She asked us to come to the dining to eat and be prepared to wash the dirty dishes as punishment. Also, be ready to put up with the taunts and bants we will receive from all quarters.

"If that's a price to pay to eat something nice, I don't mind" Josiah replied

We joined the other family members to eat at the table but we were subjected to various taunts and jokes. I kept a straight face all through the meal and pretended as if I didn't see the constant stare and mockery on the faces of my "ex-crush" and sister. Yes! Ex-crush because I know I can't stand asking her out with the disgrace.

We are close friends today and she constantly teases me with the event on January 1.

Thanks for reading another Disaster-class from your wonderful chef Chef Valour.

Till next time guys!๐Ÿฅ˜๐Ÿ’š๐Ÿ

The End!

I got so many suggestions from everyone yesterday and I've been asked to give cooking another trial. Once I get back home I will start my Cooking course afresh. PG (Potential girlfriends) fear not, Chef Valour is coming back!

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2 years ago

Comments

Atleast that incident made you close to each others๐Ÿ’š.. I'm smiling while reading ths one๐Ÿ˜..memories bring back memories

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2 years ago

I look forward to another adventure of Chef Valour HAHA. Hopefully the next one will go better than this!

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2 years ago

Lol. I'm so much interested in your sister's feelings after the incidence. It shows that he who laughs last laughs best.

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2 years ago

It's good that you tell this to know that you can be invited to eat but never to cook. LOL

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2 years ago

I can't help smiling while reading this. Haha, I want to taste the food that you cooked "chef"

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2 years ago

Grab your pen and paper let's go on another cooking course with your one and only "Chef Valour" indeed it was a cooking course and I could not stop laughing anyway I think there is a lesson to learn in every situation but the lesson i learnt never look down anybody and always appreciate what ever his been done for you in small quantity or in large quantity and in any situation and circumstances and allows encourage people.

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2 years ago

I guess it was really that bad๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚... I laughed so hard, my mum thought I had gone mad๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚... I'd love to taste your food๐Ÿ˜‚

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2 years ago

I'm at your service. Just place your orders๐Ÿ˜

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2 years ago

I need you in my kitchen chef, tell me your price. I have got BCH

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2 years ago

It isn't that much. 1BCH per week is enough.๐Ÿ˜„

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2 years ago

Lols, see mouth. Anyways I have got that, just dm

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2 years ago

Hahahaha youre so cool. Chef Valour๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜† can you please teach me how to cook?. ๐Ÿ˜‚

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2 years ago

I'm at your service Caroline17 ๐Ÿ‘จโ€๐Ÿณ but you will pay me with BCH ๐Ÿ˜‚

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2 years ago

Hahaha! Anyway, the motivation is, don't cook an Italian-restaurant-worthy-dish, cook something else instead, lol!

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2 years ago

Lesson learnt ๐Ÿคฃ

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2 years ago

Hahahaha....๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚ chef valour So this was the punishment given to you by God because of making your sister cry.You shouldn't find faults with the food cook by her if you were aware that you can't cook.I am glad your father decided to taught you a lesson by asking to prepare your own food....Ok Sorry ๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚BTW I can understand your embarrassment while they were mocking of you both..lol

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2 years ago

What a epic fail to impress your crush hahahha ๐Ÿ˜‚ but still in the end you get to be close with her because of it๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚

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2 years ago

You make me laugh HappyBoy.๐Ÿ˜ I remember when I was started practicing at cooking hehe I don't know I was like I'm only focusing at the kitchen then I felt nervous then end up funny.. Dad laughing at me.๐Ÿ˜

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2 years ago

Can you cook for me, chef? :D

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2 years ago

I'm at your service wickedsoul ๐Ÿ˜‰. Please what would you like to have?. By the way,the restroom isn't far away, incase you need to throw out after having a bite of the sweet delicacies on offer๐Ÿคฃ

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2 years ago

Funny boy, you are turning everywhere upside down with your cooking expertise

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2 years ago

Mr chef valour so you love to make disasters in the kitchen abi that why you are a happyboy. I hope one day you cook for us all here and we hope you don't burn down readcash kitchen

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2 years ago

Don't worry, the kitchen is safe๐Ÿคฃ

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2 years ago

"oil makes it soft" ๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚ thank God you guys didn't end up burning the entire house, that's a pretty bad way to start the year

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2 years ago

That's something I could have done when I was young and proud that I will be able to cook. ๐Ÿคฃ But I burn everything lol. Chef Valour you're a Star! ๐Ÿ˜

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2 years ago

๐Ÿ™Š i get a little comfort knowing I'm not the only one that has done that before ๐Ÿคฃ. Thanks Momma - I'm a Star indeed๐Ÿคฃ

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2 years ago

Woww haha love the energy! This is quiet interesting how much more if it was on cam๐Ÿ˜… i do really love cooking and its my pleasure if you'll make me your disciple master! ๐Ÿค—โ˜บ๏ธ

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2 years ago

You are welcome to my academy Athaliah๐Ÿ˜‚ call me "Sensei Valour"๐Ÿ˜‚

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2 years ago

Am really enjoying this article of your chef Valour ๐Ÿคฃ I hope I can taste your cooking if I visit Nigeria in the future..

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2 years ago

I will proudly prepare some exquisite and delicious meal for you ate jane ๐Ÿ™ˆ๐Ÿฅ˜

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2 years ago

Oh good story. By the way you can cook ? Honestly speaking i cant but i can proudly say that i can make egg lol. First time i wasted three eggs because i was cooking them on balech . Actually i have to put oil unfortunately i put balech. That day i got insult ftom my sister. After that interaction with kitchen is very rare lol

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2 years ago

I can imagine the result๐Ÿ˜‚. I think i can fry egg too๐Ÿ˜‚

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2 years ago

Congratulations bro yiu did ut ๐Ÿ˜ƒ๐Ÿ˜ƒ๐Ÿ˜ƒ๐Ÿ˜‚

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2 years ago

You made me laugh so hard. I have had this experience too when I had to cook for a girlfriend who was visiting. In my case, in was trying to be top notch. I was to prepare noodles. I bought lettuce and cabbage to make it look like what I saw on the advert in television. Men๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿคฃ I was a huge mess. It looked like yam porridge when I concluded the cooking.

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2 years ago

Pounded noodles๐Ÿ˜‚

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2 years ago

๐Ÿคฃ๐Ÿ˜‚๐ŸคฃIndeed, the worse was that I felt so much confidence thinking I have cooked the best meal only for my lady to turn me to a laughing stock.

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2 years ago