Fire in the kitchen 2

Grab your pen and paper let's go on another cooking course with your one and only "Chef Valour". With my apron tied and my imaginary long curls wrapped in a cap, a spoon in hand and a pose of a "Messi in the kitchen", I bring to you another disaster-class in the kitchen. Today's teaching won't be done by myself alone. My partner in crime, a worse cook than I, will be supporting me. It's no other person than my big bro "Josiah"

A few years back we celebrated Christmas and my sister was the one in charge of cooking. She spent hours cooking the various delicacies with no help from me and my brother. A friend was around to help her but she was agitated that we refused to help even though we all are eating the food together.

We kept on abusing her, calling her "Lazy bone" and asking her if that's how she will complain in her husband's house when she finally ties the knot. It was time to eat and right there in the dining, she started complaining again. My Dad who doesn't condone any disrespect was agitated by the words he heard we spoke to her. He started chastising us and we were embarrassed right in front of her friend. A big spoiler. Because I've been trying so hard to catch her friend's attention.

To avenge the embarrassment, after the meal we complain that the food wasn't well cooked. I went on to start pretending as if I'm purging. We said so many nasty words just to make her sad and we got what we wanted when she started crying. We didn't know that was our biggest mistake.

On the first of January, seven days after the clash with my sister. We were outside sitting like Kings, waiting for our meal when I heard "Giddy and Jossy come to the kitchen" that was my mum calling us. With happiness, we rushed to the kitchen but saw fresh pepper, uncooked turkey, rice and other kinds of stuff on two different cabinets. My Dad came in and said we will cook our meal that day, while my Mum, my sister and other visiting ladies will cook for the whole house.

Josiah started protesting, but being the stubborn one- I said "No problem, we will surprise you all". Josiah looked at me as if I was a mad man standing in front of him and gave me one of his "you must be out of your mind" look. I shrug and got to work. Maybe this can help me score a point in front of my sister's friend.

Off to YouTube, I go. But everything looked like magic to me. My sister and her friends kept giggling and whispering to each other. "You guys will see Chef Valour at work today," I said to myself.

I don't know how to describe the cooking style I used. It isn't my fault sincerely. I followed all the procedures given by the YouTuber but the rice was burning even before it got soft. I added more water and "Assistant Chef J," asked me to add oil. According to him-oil makes it soft and also prevent burning.

I did as instructed. We went out to relax a bit while we wait for our "Italian restaurant-worthy dish" to be ready.

The shout of "Gideonnnnnnnnn" was blaring through the whole building.

"They are feeling it already. I'm sure the aroma of our meal is irresistible. They want to beg for a taste" I said within myself.

"Gideon and Josiah come here!" This sounded more serious because it was the voice of my Dad.

We ran quickly to the kitchen but we were welcomed with a smoke-filled kitchen. Everyone was coughing and covering their nose. My sister came in with the fire extinguisher but before she could use it, my mum put out the fire. I stood rooted to a spot looking at the pot of rice that is now black.

"Bon appetite Giddy et Jossy" my sister whispered laughing.

The embarrassment was too much. The whole extended family was there. My cousins, nephews, nieces, uncles and other relatives. They all started laughing and guess the most annoying part. My crush was laughing too.

"Go and clear the mess you created," my dad said in between laughter.

We poured the rice away and I tried to eat the Turkey, but a single bite was enough for me to know that we were saved from further embarrassment by the burnt rice. If it had not burned, everyone would have tasted our meal and they will know that it's total nonsense.

"This is a blessing in disguise" I whispered to Josiah and he started laughing, having understood the meaning of the statement.

What to eat was the next problem. We went to our room and I resigned to either take Cornflakes cassava flakes. At least that requires no stress. But my Lovely Mum came in and said she has pleaded on our behalf. She asked us to come to the dining to eat and be prepared to wash the dirty dishes as punishment. Also, be ready to put up with the taunts and bants we will receive from all quarters.

"If that's a price to pay to eat something nice, I don't mind" Josiah replied

We joined the other family members to eat at the table but we were subjected to various taunts and jokes. I kept a straight face all through the meal and pretended as if I didn't see the constant stare and mockery on the faces of my "ex-crush" and sister. Yes! Ex-crush because I know I can't stand asking her out with the disgrace.

We are close friends today and she constantly teases me with the event on January 1.

Thanks for reading another Disaster-class from your wonderful chef Chef Valour.

Till next time guys!🥘💚🍝

The End!

I got so many suggestions from everyone yesterday and I've been asked to give cooking another trial. Once I get back home I will start my Cooking course afresh. PG (Potential girlfriends) fear not, Chef Valour is coming back!