It's another Sunday. A special day for everyone, both the churchgoers and Non-Church goers. I've been privileged to converse with few people that are choristers and workers in their various churches back home. But in school they hardly attend Sunday service talk less of being a worker.
"I'm a Christian because my parents are Christians " is the popular line you'd hear them say.
They are right in some ways, a Muslim brother could have been a Christian if born into a Christian home and a Christian- Muslim if born into an Islam home or even any other religion. But one thing I noticed is that while at home, they attend church services and actively engage in church activities all because they want to please their parents. The true meaning of salvation is lost to them.
The most affected ones are the Minister's children. The devil constantly looks for a way to attack them, hence you see pastor sons and daughters turning into something else while in school. Is it that their parents didn't teach them the right thing? Or should we blame the devil as usual?.
In the Bible, God sent a message to Eli through Samuel. He asked him to speak to his children who were recalcitrant and were doing things that shouldn't be done by someone like them. But did Eli act on it?. No, he said "...he is the Lord, let him do what is good in his eyes" 1 Samuel 3 vs 18. Instead of calling them to order, he chose to remain silent. We all know how it ended for him and his children.
Be your child's best friend
This isn't just to the Christians here. Every parent should try to be close to their children. Be approachable. Don't be the type that your children will be afraid of walking up to when they have one or two challenges. If your child can't seek advice from you, he/she will look for a place to get the advice. And trust me, the advice he receives outside won't be nice at all.
Mothers should be their daughters' confidants and fathers their sons' buddies. Don't be a Lion that cannot be walked up to. And when they tell you things that you find unreasonable or liable to disaster, tell them with love. Chastise them when need be, but be wise with it.
If your 12-year-old daughter says she is planning to go back to her 2nd ex. I'm sure what comes to mind is "The second ex?. How many does she even have?." Your reaction at that stage matters a lot. Do you hit her, slap her and give her some punishment?. If this is what you will do, be rest assured that next time when a 90-year-old man asks her out she won't bother to tell you.
Another reaction can be -you sitting her down and advising her on the danger of the part she's heading. Let her know how disappointed you are, show this with your words, not fist. Words have more effect than fist. I'm not totalling against the act of punishing a disobedient child, but it gets to a stage where punishment birth no changes in a child again.
Pray for them constantly
Prayer is important. Never stop praying for your children. Constantly put them into God's hands, call them and pray for them. It works -Prayer works. Also, teach them how to pray. When things get tough for them in school, instead of joining the public in panicking and indulging in some unpleasant endeavours, they should go on their knees and put everything into God's hands. Don't let them view going to church or being a Christian as a burden. No, let them know how wonderful it is to be.
Conclusion
There is little we can do once our kids are out there in the real world. With their peers and people from different backgrounds. Teach them how to be tolerant and accommodating. How to shine their light wherever they are and how to be a good ambassador of Christ.
Constantly pray for them and check on them. The world we are in today is one filled with various Social vices and peer pressure. A kid with the best behaviour at home can be a monster in school. Monitor them without them feeling caged.
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I could only imagine that parenting is real hard. I only get gist of it from colleagues who are already parents and their kids are barely teenagers. I am a product of praying parents. Prayer plays a vital role at any point in a relationship specially when a parent is just starting to make up for times they were not the ideal parents.
I admire parents who can glide smoothly between being a parent and then being a best friend to their kids.