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Win, Help and You - Self Therapy Part 1

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Avatar for Grecy095
Written by   107
2 months ago

The year 2014 was the downfall of my life. I lose my job because I quit. I cannot take the pressure the job is giving me and the people around me at work. The people around me do not care about my emotions, they don’t have a concern about my health too. I was diagnosed with liver problems that year too. I found out that I have a liver laceration that I got from an accident in 2012. I have serious bleeding and getting in and out of the hospital was my past time. Since my co-employee and manager do not understand what I’m going through I took a one-week leave and I gave my resignation when I came back. I felt free from all the worries they were throwing back at me. They are the worst people I’ve ever known.

All the thorns in my heart were gone after I free myself from working hard for these toxic people. I thought I will be okay because I have peace of mind. However, that peace of mind is only from the toxic people I was not seeing at that time but another problem arises and another and another. My problem was, I am one of the breadwinners, my family doesn’t know the severity of my illness, plus the hospital bills, where can I get the money? If you are in that dilemma, for sure you will lose your mind.

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What happened to me?

I kept on thinking and calculating. During those times, Bubblews is gone and I only have Humanatic to help me with earnings. I also have Forum Coin and this Monkey site and Blogjob. I know most of you that had been with Bubblews will be familiar with all the sites I had stated. They are all free money-making sites and the highest earnings I got in a day is $20 but not consistent. I am nocturnal so I schedule my working hours at night till morning. That is my online income source. The hospital bills are piling up and my earnings were never enough. There were times my online friends will hold fundraising online too. I remember the owner of the site Blogjob donated money for me when he read my blog about my illness. A lot of people are helping, but still, the bills are excessive that I decided to stop going to the hospital and just endure the pain.

I cry every night. I always talk to God. I always talk to God and ask him what is his plans for me. I ask him that I am weak so I need to be strong, I need him to be strong. One night, I was crying while listening to calls (Humanatic) and I can barely breathe. I was near of dying or having a heart attack because of the pain. I can't hold on to the pain. It is a literal sharp pain in the heart. I decided to accept the challenge but I felt I was facing it alone. I am defeated even I am starting to fight . I told God, I am defeated let me die now. Let me die now to end this. I am just a weakling.

The Dream

After a week of crying, my tears went dry. I felt demotivated. I can’t get a simple joke. I am not appreciating everything. My laughter is on the lowest energy level. I do not talk to anyone at home. I make sure that when everyone is awake, I am asleep. If everyone begins sleeping, I start working. I stop praying to God. I will just wait for the miracle to happen, or maybe I will just leave a day until I am alive.

One night, I had a dream. It was a busy street. People do not see me, as if I am not existing. I don’t know why I was there, then I don’t remember how it ends. When I woke up, there is a book in front of me. I think it's my book and I was looking at the book. I open it on a certain page, I don’t know why I did that. The only visible words are Win, Help, and You.

I was contemplating about those words I saw. I even write it in my journal. Then something flashes in my brain, the logo of Youtube, so I went to Youtube. I didn’t browse, I didn’t move the cursor. I just look at it. Then I saw from the screen the video title “I win or learn, but I never Lose” by Maria Forleo. If you read some of my articles from the past, I mentioned this statement already because this becomes my guide when I have failures. Not an excuse but this is my affirmation to get back on track again. I watched the video and there is a message that helps me there which I am applying in my daily life since then.

Below the video is the video of Tapping for 50 Thousand Dollars by Margarette Lynch. I watched it, it is weird. Then another video was there, I guess it is part of the suggestions at YouTube and it is still from Margarette Lynch, tapping for anxiety. There are lots of tapping technique videos below every video. I watched it all.

The Message

Then and there, I realized God is telling me something. Then I get back to these three words, Win Help and You. From those videos, they have a common thing and that is helping you. Helping yourself alone. Yes, I felt that I can only help myself. When QI do it, I will win. That is what God is telling me, I Help Myself which is You so that I will win. So I begin planning on how I will help myself to win. To Win is just a big word to me. There are lots of things associated with it that I found out later on. Since it is getting long, I will continue the story tomorrow. I do believe you will find inspiration in my story therefore I will share it you with step by step.

All Images are from Unsplash, except my the notes on my Journal, which is mine.

September 14, 2021

#BetterSeptember

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Written by   107
2 months ago
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Comments

Naalala ko mga time na yan Grecy. Di ko lang maalala saan mo pinost.

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2 months ago

Blog job Iyan ❤️

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2 months ago

So happy that you made it yourself. We need motivation but it's only ourselves that can truly make it work

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2 months ago

We must start what kind of changes we want in our life. It all starts in ourselves

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2 months ago

Yes, no one else but ourselves

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2 months ago

That's the spirit! If we want something to be done, if we want to win, we have to start in us. Good job!

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2 months ago

Truly indeed. All of it will start from us.

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2 months ago

Your story is very inspirational, from almost giving up until you found the reason to moved on with your life. I am very glad you didn’t give up and you can share your story to everyone who is having a bad time too. 😊

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2 months ago

I think God's message to me is to move forward and start over. I have a bad situation before but it will end and I still a life to look forward.

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2 months ago

Exactly dear, I may not know you personally, but I want you to know I am proud of you. You fought a good fight and you succeeded 😊

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2 months ago

Thank you sis!! Still fighting sis and I will not just give up easily

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2 months ago

That’s the spirit sis. labarn lang ganern!😊

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2 months ago

Sarili lang natin ang makakaresolba ng problema natin. Hindi makakatulong ang pag iyak. Iiyak ka wala naman pong nagbago. Nandun padin. Tiwala lang po at tibay ng loob. Na malalagpasan natin yang problema nayan. 😊

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2 months ago

Relate, hehe wala naman kasing makakatulong talaga satin kundi tayu lang din. Suggest lang meron sila, peru okay nadin atleast may suggestions kang naririnig. I'm glad that you overcome it by your own.

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2 months ago

I am overcoming it, but my difference from what I was before, I now have my ways to help myself. It helps

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2 months ago

It's only you yourself who can help to win your battle in life. I like the three words..

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2 months ago

Me too, I think that message is for all of us, God is willing to help us anytime

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2 months ago

Kapag umiyak ka sis sa problema mo ng magisa asahan mo pagkatapos magaan na ito sa pakiramdam. Ako ganun iiyam ko lang lahat pagkatapos ay ok na ko. Pero may iba iba nman tayong paraan.good thing na ok ka wag mo nalang masyadong isipin ang mga bagay bagay na makakasira sa health mo.

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2 months ago

Oo totoo yan sis, tama ka, saka pag madilim ang sitwasyon, wag tambayan mag move on kagad sa solution

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2 months ago

Tama ung problema hayaan mong siya mamroblema sayo hehe

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2 months ago

Such a word of affirmation to me who is struggling of anxieties. I am happy to read all of this wisdom that comes from experiences. Thank you for sharing this. It really help me. I was just rising from anxiety just last day. And this is also message from God to me through you. You are a blessings. 🥰❤️

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2 months ago

Yes, I know God will use everyone as an instrument of what they are going through that is why I able to create this one.

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2 months ago

Virtual hugs to you from me. Love2 🥰

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2 months ago

Working in an unhealthy environment wont do good. You will not grow in there, if the people that surrounds you doesn't seem to care your well being. Well, its really good to cry and talked to God for every time we may feel we are so down and uncertain. We felt so relieved and much strong after crying.

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2 months ago

You are right. When toxic people are around us, give up the fight because we will never win

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2 months ago